


Electrostatic Naïveté

by A_Llama_Called_Frizz



Category: Inazuma Eleven, Inazuma Eleven: Orion no Kokuin
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Electrocution, Everyone is probably ooc, Gen, Heavy Angst, I am a firm believer in the 'Shinjou Takuma is Asuto's father' theory, I feel like this is too many tags, I'm being more realistic than canon with how certain things go, In which Asuto is Asuto and gets kidnapped by Orion because of it, Inazuma Eleven Spoilers, Kidnapping, Orion being Orion, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Recovery, Shinjou Takuma is Inamori Asuto's Father, Solitary Confinement, also physical torture but hey, can you tell I've only watched like 7 eps of Orion and nothing else, nobody is happy in this but especially Asuto, so get ready for Actually Traumatised Hikaru and the joys of due process, takes place right after Japan's match with Spain, the japanese embassy gets involved at some point i think, there may be a slight buzzfeed unsolved cameo at some point, whoops I accidentally made Ichihoshi the deuteragonist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2020-02-16 08:37:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 42,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18687952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Llama_Called_Frizz/pseuds/A_Llama_Called_Frizz
Summary: When dealing with an organisation as powerful and morally bankrupt as the Orion Foundation, the potential consequences of misplaced trust can quickly spiral into something rather unfortunate.Enter Inamori Asuto, who has yet to learn that lesson, up until Shinjou Takuma exploits his desire for finding his father to lead him right into a trap, and Asuto pays a very high price for his naivety.He goes missing the same day, apparently having been disappeared by Orion. Until Asuto's unconscious body is eventually unceremoniously dumped on the Japan team's residence, and now the team has to deal with the fact that Asuto is fundamentally not the same person as before.(Or alternatively, because I suck at summaries: Asuto gets tricked into walking straight into a trap laid by Orion, and gets tortured for it.)





	1. The steep, steep price for naivety

**Author's Note:**

> An organisation with as much power and so few morals as the Orion Foundation is not something to be all too trusting with. 
> 
> Enter Inamori Asuto, who doesn't quite know the meaning of the word 'distrustful'.
> 
> \---
> 
> Hope you have fun!! I'm very sleep deprived right now and this is purely self-indulgent.

It’s after a training session at roughly 5pm that Asuto gets a message from Shinjou Takuma.

 

**[Shinjou Takuma] 5:03pm**

**Inamori-kun, I’ve finally found your father. He wants to meet you here:**

And right below that first message is the address. Asuto doesn’t recognise it, but plugging it into his phone reveals that it’s a mere fifteen minute walk from his current location. He sends a message to Shinjou that he’ll be there shortly and gets ready to head off.

 

However, it’s when he gets to the door to leave when Nosaka spots him. “Asuto, where are you going?” He asks, looking vaguely curious, by Nosaka standards.

 

“Oh, I’ve finally managed to find my dad! We’re just going to meet up now!” Asuto answers, unable to contain his excitement and slightly vibrating on the spot. His dad! Asuto’s finally going to get to meet his dad!

 

It then occurs to Asuto that Nosaka probably doesn’t know all of the intricacies of Asuto’s familial drama, and Asuto rushes to get a bare-boned rundown out of his mouth so he can leave quicker. Nosaka doesn’t need to know every little detail of Asuto’s family life, and Asuto kinda wants it to stay that way. He also pointedly doesn’t mention that the man who offered to look for his dad was the Chairman’s Aide, because while Shinjou has only good intentions for reuniting Asuto with his dad, chances are nobody else will think so and he’ll be unofficially locked in, and then he won’t ever get to meet his dad!

 

“What’s the address?” Nosaka finally asks after a pause, in a tone that Asuto has learnt to mean that he’s thinking of something important. Asuto pays it no mind and recited the address. Given how he declined Nosaka’s offer to accompany him roughly five consecutive times in a row, it’s only fair that _someone_ knows where Asuto’s gone. Just in case. It’s a bit overdramatic given how plain old _nice_ Shinjou is, but within the context of the mysterious second spy it’s no wonder Nosaka is taking all precautions.

 

“Welp gotta go!” Asuto yells at nobody in particular as he dashes out the door, leaving the training grounds and towards a fated meeting with his father.

 

* * *

 

 

Fifteen minutes pass after Asuto’s departure, and Nosaka takes the lack of any distressed phonecalls as a good sign.

 

Nosaka doesn’t quite know what’s happening with Asuto behind the scenes, but sorta wants to; For someone who’s only parent succumbed to illness the day their soccer team got disbanded, Asuto really does give the appearance that he’s never suffered in his life. He’s even more dumbfounded that this is pretty common knowledge within Asuto’s friends at Inakuni and – in a surreal twist of fate – _Haizaki of all people._

 

Regardless, Nosaka has a bad feeling about this chance meeting between Asuto and his father – the dodging around the question when Nosaka asked who offered to search was telling enough that something much more sinister is happening behind the scenes. Although, while Asuto may be naïve to a fault and easy to take advantage of because of it, he’s the last person Nosaka would ever think was the second traitor within InaJapan. At least _willingly._

 

When Nosaka voiced his concerns to Mansaku and the others on the Inakuni team a couple minutes after Asuto’s departure, he got a similar reaction. “Please, look after him.” Mansaku asks Nosaka, “Asuto may be sunshine incarnate, but he’s also so naïve it would be child’s play for someone to take advantage of him, so we all look out for him – especially me and Kirina.” Mansaku finishes, gripping his hat in anxiety. Nosaka just nods, returning to the front room, unable to shake the feeling that he’s made a grave error in letting Asuto leave.

 

And just like a vague portent of doom, Hikaru walks into the room where Nosaka and Nishikage are sitting, with Nosaka looking nervous, head in his hands and eyes distant.

 

Hikaru, bless his analytical mind, seems to notice the tension in the room. “What’s up?” He asks as nonchalantly as he dares. Nosaka and Nishikage may be easy-going people, but the tension in the room is palpable.

 

“Asuto went to meet up with his long-lost father just now.” Nishikage answers, arms crossed on the table. While he doesn’t seem as anxious as Nosaka, his eyebrows are still furrowed in concern.

 

“Hikaru, do you recognise this address?” Nosaka asks, having perked up at the obvious idea.

 

Nosaka recites the address, and Hikaru _pales,_ and Nosaka’s anxiety increases tenfold.

 

“That’s,” Hikaru barely manages to croak, clearly shaking, “ _that’s Orion’s headquarters.”_ He forces out through clenched teeth.

 

Nosaka realises the connection between the location and the supposedly touching reunion seconds later, and his eyes blow wide in panic and he stands up so forcefully the chair goes flying backwards, “Shit!” he exclaims, already about to sprint off when Hikaru’s voice stops him.

 

“it’s a fifteen minute walk from here.” He adds, barely a whisper, eyes wide in fear and voice high with what may be hope that it’s _not too late._

 

“it’s _been_ fifteen minutes.” Nishikage seethes to no-one but himself. Whatever hope Hikaru may have had of saving Asuto gets dashed and he feels vaguely like the earth has given out under him.

 

“Coach!” Nosaka practically yells at full volume as he sprints towards where Coach is, Hikaru and Nishikage following close behind. A distant part of Hikaru notes that this is the most emotion he’s seen Nosaka express, but that gets buried in a box labelled ‘inappropriately timed thoughts.’

 

They reach the room where Coach Zhao Jinyun is currently in alongside the rest of InaJapan in record time, and Nishikage kicks open the door with enough force for it to slam into the wall behind it. They’ll worry about any potential property damage later, once Asuto is safe. Everyone else turns to stare at the three's dramatic entrance, all previous conversation having died.

 

“Asuto’s been kidnapped by Orion!” Hikaru yells out after a moment to catch his breath, words tripping over themselves to tumble out of his mouth in his panic.

 

The words finally process a second later, and all hell breaks loose.

 

* * *

 

In his excitement to meet his father, Asuto arrives to the rendezvous in twelve minutes time.

 

It was a bit difficult trying to find the location, specifically because the navigation system on his phone is incredibly confusing disregarding Asuto’s complete lack of knowledge of Russia. Plus, the image of the location is of a nondescript building that blends into the surroundings, leaving Asuto nothing to use as an identifier.

 

The meetup area is a company building complex, with the centre being a rather fancy but otherwise plain looking high-rise building, with modern looking grey buildings with polished glass windows. The buildings are all within a wide open concrete area, guarded by a wire fence and guards and a wide entrance to allow for cars. The guards at the gate seem to have been informed of Asuto arriving, because one of them recognises him and waves him over to let him in. Him being on InaJapan must make him recognisable, because the guards don’t even ask him for ID and open the door to the side of the drive-through entrance. Asuto practically powerwalks through the threshold towards where his father is.

 

He really can’t contain his excitement – Asuto knows nothing about his dad other than him being a pro soccer player at the height of his career when Asuto was born, and he was skilled enough to be scouted for an overseas team. And while anyone else would probably count that as parental abandonment – especially in the context of how ill Asuto’s mom was – Asuto is determined to have a good relationship with his dad, reconnecting and making up for all the lost years.

 

One of the staff members – a smart looking secretary woman in a clean business suit and glasses – leads Asuto into a spacious meeting area on the third floor and tells him to wait for Shinjou Takuma, and that he’ll be here in a few minutes. Asuto obliges, sitting down in one of the chairs by the coffee table in the middle of the room and lets his imagination run wild with ideas on who his father could be. He’s obviously a pro soccer player, but the look and feel of this complex has the telltale signs of a massively successful company, and that merely adds fuel to the fire of speculation. In the few minutes it takes for Takuma to arrive, heralded by the turning of the doorknob, Asuto’s leg is already bouncing in anticipation, and he stands up straight in greeting when Takuma enters, chest bubbling in thrill to the point where Asuto can’t talk.

 

That thrill turns to confusion and then _fear_ once Chairman Girikanan walks in, accompanied by two men in black suits and sunglasses.

 

“Asuto Inamori, what a pleasure to meet you.” he says, with the air of a man whose plan has worked perfectly and he knows it.

 

Confused and oh so very afraid, Asuto croaks out a “You said my dad would be here.” It wasn’t supposed to come out vaguely like a question, but Asuto’s heart slamming against his ribcage makes being steady with his voice almost impossible.

 

At that, Girkikanan’s smile turns _sadistic_ “Oh, your father _is_ here, and he was the one to lead you here in the first place.”

 

Asuto suddenly can’t breathe, and the walls are closing in around him. He turns to look at Takuma – the person who lead him right into a trap, his _father_ – and sees him with his shoulders hunched down, defeated. His face is carefully blank, but his eyebrows are ever-so-slightly pinched, and his eyes are burning with pain as he stares at the floor, suddenly enraptured with the carpet as he avoids looking everywhere _but_ at Asuto. His _son,_ who he just tricked into walking straight into the enemy’s turf.

 

“It’s a shame you brought your phone with you. That was a valuable bugged device we can’t use anymore,” Mr. Girikanan laments to nobody in particular but himself, and Asuto’s world stops more at the realisation that _he was the second spy and he didn’t know it, oh god **he was the one leaking the data-**_

****

“Oh well, it’ll be worth it.” The Chairman continues, bringing Asuto out of his spiralling thoughts, and he snaps his fingers, “bring him to the cell.” He finishes, and the suited men make their way over to Asuto, grabbing him on either side.

 

It’s at that moment that Asuto realises that this was a kidnapping. An incredibly elaborate kidnapping lead by his father under the innocent guise of helping Asuto find his father. Although, Asuto was fully aware of who _Shinjou Takuma_ was before all this, so he really has no-one to blame but himself for trusting him.

 

The second the guards lift him and his feet leave the floor, his panic increases tenfold and he can’t think of anything else other than _get out get out GET OUT._ Asuto kicks and thrashes and screams with all the strength he can muster, hopped up on adrenaline and fear, but it’s ultimately useless. Asuto is a mere child of small stature and no outstanding muscle mass to speak of, and these are grown adults with height and strength and probably combat experience up to their teeth, so Asuto never stood a chance to begin with. Once the reality of that fact fully sinks in, he thrashes in a desperate last attempt at freedom as his tears blur his vision and his screams morph into pleads for _anyone_ to help him.

 

To the surprise of absolutely no-one, nobody comes to his aid, and he’s dragged out the room and down the hallway, kicking and thrashing all the while. His eyes glance upon Girikanan and Takuma as he’s dragged out, and something about the way Takuma – his _dad_ – faces away from Asuto with his hands in his pockets, seemingly not having moved, must break whatever part of Asuto’s mind was still under the pretence that he’d be alright, because his screams and yells dissolve into broken sobs that wrack his entire frame, and the borrowed energy he was running on leaves him.

 

He lets the guards drag him to wherever they’re keeping him, and he lets them slap a bulky metal gauntlet that wraps across his entire forearm on each arm without incident. It’s heavy, and obviously has something like a battery in it given the way a small rectangle juts out. The bracelet is the least of his worries however, as they reach his holding cell and the guards shove him in there with enough force to push him on the floor, slamming the door behind them.

 

The room is small, almost claustrophobic, and it’s also sparse; there’s no exciting or even noticeable decoration, all concrete walls and a steel door and the only furniture is a single bed pushed against the far corner of the left wall, a toilet and sink by the corner, and a giant tv built into the wall, currently displaying the Orion Foundation logo on the screen. A single bright ceiling light is the only illumination, given the lack of windows letting in natural light.

 

The words ‘solitary confinement’ floats through Asuto’s mind, and he brings his knees to his face as softly cries, gently rocking back and forth, with no-one to blame for this but himself.


	2. 240 Volts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having just been ever so slightly too late, InaJapan now has to pay the heavy toll of assuming all was right with Inamori Asuto, and deal with the consequences thereafter.
> 
> Meanwhile, Asuto suffers, as someone in Orion's clutches is wont to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen I KNOW this chap took forever to come out but work and school has been kicking my ass and chapter 2 is a bajillion times longer than it has any right to be, so I'm splitting it into smaller parts, so sorry for any pacing issues that happen because of that!!
> 
> (also can you tell I have no idea how anyone acts. This is what I get for only watching Orion huh)

It takes a good minute for Zhao to wrestle back some form of order from everyone, and a good thirty seconds after that to get everyone to be silent enough to listen.

 

“Explain.” He demands, eyes gazing intently at Hikaru, uncharacteristically serious.

 

“We’re not entirely sure it _is_ a kidnapping, _but,_ ” Nosaka starts when Hikaru can’t find enough of his voice to talk, “Asuto said that someone was searching for his father and that they’d finally found him. He left fifteen minutes ago to the location given.” He finishes, swallowing around the lump in his throat.

 

“And that location was Orion.” Coach doesn’t even bother making it sound like a question, already having pieced it together.

 

“The headquarters, to be exact.” Hikaru pipes up, having somehow kicked his mouth into working. If at all possible, the panicked atmosphere in the room increases tenfold.

 

“Then what the fuck are we doing here? We need to go find him! Or at least call the police!” Haizaki yells, fists slamming against the table as he stands up. For all his aloof nature, the protective rage and fear he’s feeling is practically palpable.

 

“We can’t,” Atsuya interjects, and he hurries to explain himself once the entire room snaps their heads to look at him in disbelief, “if we file a missing person’s report now, then Orion _will_ know that we know what’s happened, and there’s no telling what they’d do then.” He clarifies, and the unspoken ‘they might even kill him’ hovers in the air.

 

“Atsuya is right; we need to make it seem like we don’t know what’s going on,” Coach Zhao says, standing up and entering serious coach mode, “we’ll give it until nightfall and if Asuto doesn’t return by then, I’ll file a missing person’s report.” He says with a note of finality.

 

“So what are we supposed to do until then? Sit around as our panic eats us alive?” Kirina demands, voice heavy with anger. Beside him, Mansaku is trying to call Asuto’s phone for the nth time, and once again it goes straight to voicemail as Mansaku’s eyes glaze over in despair. Hikaru recalls Asuto telling him that Mansaku and Kirina are always looking out for him, since he’s naïve to a fault, and Hikaru feels even more pathetic than before.

 

“I’m afraid so. But,” Nosaka says, turning to Hikaru, “Hikaru, you’re the only one here who actually knows how Orion operates, is there anything you can tell us about what they might do?” He asks, and Hikaru can feel the entire room bore holes into him with their hopeful staring.

 

“Well, uh,” He starts, kicking his good-for-nothing analytical mind into overdrive, “it depends on a lot of factors, and I don’t know _why_ Orion would kidnap Asuto specifically, unless it was for convenience with him in contact with Orion, or if maybe- _maybe_ that whole father thing wasn’t a lie, and they’re gonna try to turn him into a Disciple.” He finishes, saying the words so fast that he has to stop for breath at the end.

 

“So what you’re saying is that they’re going to _blackmail_ him?” Mansaku finally interjects, clutching his phone in a deathgrip. Hikaru can see the caller ID being Asuto, and can see it go once again straight to voicemail. The nod Hikaru gives in response collectively deflates the team, and that’s the exact moment a more sinister possibility enters his mind.

 

“Although,” Hikaru starts, but his throat chokes up at the thought of it, and it takes a very demanding nod from Mansaku for him to continue, “there’s always the possibility that they’ll use Asuto as blackmail, o-or use him as a proxy punishment?” he finishes, and it gets so progressively uncertain that the last part is barely a whisper. Regardless, it has the effect that Hikaru was specifically hoping not to happen.

 

“So what, he’s dead?!” Haizaki explodes, standing up with enough force to knock the chair backwards.

 

At Haizaki’s outburst, the entire team explodes into a frenzy of heated arguments, all based on Asuto being alive, all as Hikaru’s optimism crumbles. If Asuto’s dad really _is_ working for Orion and he failed in whatever mission he had or he’s perhaps a traitor, then there’s every chance in the world that they’ll use Asuto to punish him, which will _definitely_ involve the same methods Orion uses to ‘eliminate’ any Disciples that fail, _which means-_

“He’s probably dead.” Hikaru whispers quietly to himself, but the others must have heard him, because the entire room stops and looks at him, tension laid so thick in the air Hikaru can’t breathe.

 

“If his dad works for Orion, and he’s somehow upset them, then they’ll do this ‘elimination’ thing they do to disciples that fail their mission, but they might’ve done it to Asuto instead to teach his dad a lesson especially if his dad is high ranking and they can’t replace him easily and I don’t _really_ know what the elimination process entails but everyone I’ve seen it happen to has never came back and _oh god he’s really dead isn’t he?“_ Hikaru starts rambling to nobody in particular. He’s staring at the floor but his eyes aren’t registering anything, and all the words he’s saying float over his ears as his voice gets increasingly more panicked and his eyes start filling with tears and a distant part of him goes ‘oh, a panic attack.’

 

He falls to the floor as he starts hyperventilating, and he can’t really see anything past the blur his tears are causing. Someone that Hikaru thinks is Nishikage but can’t tell through the panic rushes over to him and starts whispering _in, out, in, out, repeat_ as painful sobs wrack his body and he curls into himself, all the other members of InaJapan forgotten.

 

“It’s been a long day – go try and rest up, and I’ll wait until nightfall and file a missing person’s report if I need to.” Coach Zhao finally steps in with a finality that makes all of InaJapan break off to their respective haunts, the days events heavy on everyone’s minds.

 

And eventually nightfall arrives, with a pointed lack of Asuto. Not that anyone was expecting it, but the finality of it breaks what little composure the team had. Kirina’s sobs can be heard even from the hallways as Coach talks to the police on the phone, and Hikaru’s never felt more pathetic in his life.

 

* * *

 

Asuto eventually wakes up, neither knowing the day nor the time.

 

The bed is pretty uncomfortable, and his back aches from sleeping on it. His head pounds and his eyes feel stuffy with all the sobbing, and last night’s(?) events drained him to the point of him crashing into the bed, problems left for when he wakes up.

 

And now he’s here. He has all the time in the world, and there’s nothing in his room to entertain him other than the idle wall-mounted tv. It’s a room of boredom and isolation, and Asuto’s only got himself to blame for being in it.

 

Suddenly, after what feels like hours of staring at the same part of the ceiling, the tv blares on, and a replay of the Japan vs Spain match they just had starts playing. Asuto has no idea what Orion is doing and why, but it’s the only form of stimulation he has, and he greedily soaks up every second of it, and only cries a little when he sees himself with his team on the pitch, dreaming of being just a day in the past, far and away from here.

 

The match is at the point where Endou is trying to stop Clario’s Diamond Ray and fails, making Spain score the first goal. When the goal is scored, the clunky bracelets on Asuto’s arm start beeping, and it’s the only warning he gets before a high-voltage current of electricity courses through his body and he falls to the floor, muscles seizing up due to the current. He can practically _feel_ the electricity throughout his body, and it’s hot and it’s searing and it’s _agony_. Asuto is pretty certain that the animalistic noises of pain are his own screams, but he's unaware of anything past the white hot agony.

 

And just like it began, it ends. Asuto’s body crumples, having just been released from its electric prison, while his screams that have ruined his throat devolve into whimpers and sobs. He’s sore all over and his throat feels like sandpaper and the room is starting to spin, and a quick glance at the TV shows that it’s been _at most_ ten seconds, even though it feels like an eternity and _oh god they’re gonna keep doing this, aren’t they?_

And sure enough, they do; when Clario scores again, the exact same thing happens, with the only difference being that Asuto can at least try to brace for it. It doesn’t help, or maybe it does, or maybe it was a fruitless endeavour anyway, since the first shock left him sore to the point where the second is _so much worse._ Asuto remembers that Japan tied with Spain at 3-3, which means four more shocks, and despair seeps into Asuto’s bones at the prospect of enduring four more shocks like that.

 

Of course, Orion apparently isn’t content enough to leave it there, because when Atsuya and Shirou score, it’s two shocks instead of the one, one right after the other. It leaves Asuto once again on the floor, arms tingling at the epicentre of the shocks. The idea that Asuto could legitimately die from this enters his mind, and he entertains the thought, if only just to pass the time until the next inevitable shock.

 

And on and on it goes. It’s one shock when Spain scores, two shocks when Japan scores – it’s a steady rhythm that Asuto quickly gets the hang of, which is of course why it all gets thrown out the window when it’s the – for lack of a better term – ‘winning’ goal by Asuto.

 

Asuto braces himself for two shocks, and instead gets _three._ By the time the match is over, Asuto has been electrocuted a grand total of ten times, and his body is sore and he’s numb all over.

 

The TV clicks off for who knows how long, and Asuto slowly, ever so slowly, starts to lose his mind.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, episode 28 and 29 huh. Those are episodes that exist. Episodes that heavily imply that Asuto is about to get Orion'd (especially given how episode 33 is literally called 'Asuto's Disappearance'). Can't believe I accidentally predicted the entire plot I'm dying.
> 
> I'm completely ignoring Inamori 'Real Man' Masato because let's be real here, that's a fake dad to lure Asuto into joining Orion. TakuDad supporters sound off in the chat.


	3. A Question With No Answer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first 72 hours of a missing person's case are crucial, as leads start to go cold and hope for ever finding the missing person in any good state become naught to nothing. 
> 
> Inamori Asuto went missing at 5pm, while the phone was picked up at 10pm, and the clock is ticking for InaJapan, at the curious intersection of knowing the culprit and unable to save the victim.
> 
> All the while Hikaru, in the throes of despair and guilt, tries to answer the one question that started this whole mess: Who is Asuto's dad?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay listen I know it's been like 2 or 3 months but i c a n e x p l a i n
> 
> a) school is kicking my ass  
> b) life is kicking my ass  
> c) This Chapter Is Somehow 26 Pages On My Word Document. Granted I'm using size 14 font but it's still /10067 words long/
> 
> I know that's an INCREDIBLE balance issue but!! I didn't feel like splitting it up into chunks and posting the chunks at once because I sorta wrote it to work best as one whole chapter since it's covering a considerable timespan's worth of content, and also I imagine it's more wild for y'all to get a 10k chap rather than 5 2k chaps?? Especially after how long I made y'all wait!! I like to add an element of chaos to everything I do I guess. I've also been reading your comments last chapter and!! Thank
> 
> Also!! Some important things to bear in mind!!
> 
> 1) I alternate between 'Ichihoshi' and 'Hikaru' - the former is for more generalised 3rd person pov, but the latter is when I'm focusing more on Hikaru himself!! That makes no sense sHIT  
> 2) I've decided to call Golem Iwato because, uh, actually idk why I just did.  
> 3) I'VE ALSO STARTED CALLING HIURA KIRINA INSTEAD BECAUSE FUCK ME I'M INCONSISTENT JIEFAKRG I'LL HOPEFULLY GO CHANGE THAT  
> 4) Since I've been writing this over the months since I last updated, a lot of shit doesn't fit now with what the new eps have released (*laughs in skinny Kozoumaru*). I tried to work around it but I've tweaked some things  
> 5) I have no idea what I'm doing
> 
> I hope you enjoy!! I'm so sorry for making you wait so long!! If you really want it to be in bitesized chunks instead just holler in the comments and I'll try to rework it!! 
> 
> HAVE FUN I'M SO SORRY

The story breaks the next morning, and it’s the only thing anyone will talk about.

 

At least not InaJapan, who instead sit around the table eating breakfast in an oppressive silence, the weight of last night’s events heavy on their minds. Haizaki looks one bad look away from a hefty amount of murder charges, Mansaku, Kirina and the rest of the Inakuni part of the team looks about ten years older, and Ichihoshi’s eyes are red-rimmed with long dried tears, eating his cereal on autopilot. Even with Endou trying to remain as positive as one can in this situation, an air of misery floods the room.

 

Regardless, Coach filed the missing person’s report sometime around ten o’clock local time, and in the eight hours between then and now the case has snowballed into an international frenzy and a media circus. All the while the InaJapan members slept as well as they can given the circumstances – all the Inakuni players look like they got roughly three hours sleep each. Which, uh, _fair._

 

The story reached the Japanese speaking portion of the world roughly four hours in, and due to the magic of timezones, the rest of the Inakuni team heard the news at 8am their time. It was a fitful sleep for the Inakuni members in Russia, and only partially because of the barrage of 2am phone calls.

 

Whilst at breakfast the notification for the Inakuni group chat alerts to a group call, and all the Inakuni players excuse themselves from the table to take the call in a more private area. The second Hiura accepts the call on his phone Michinari’s face fills the screen, with everyone else over at Japan crowding around, including Kozoumaru, who’s finally free from one of his elusive private training sessions.

 

“We saw the news.” He opens with, voice at the direct midpoint between despair and the kind of numbness one feels after a tragedy. It’s fitting, especially given his eyes are red from apparent crying.

 

“Yeah.” Kirina sighs, deflating even more than he was before.

 

“How are you guys holding up? Have there been any updates? Do you know what happened? The latest story says they still haven’t found him and I know we’re behind on the news and all given how they have to translate it to Japanese but-“ Norika cuts in, getting progressively more emotional with every word. She eventually pauses and turns her heard to the ground, before snapping it back up to the screen, tears in her eyes, “ _Please_ , tell me you know _something!”_ she pleads, and there’s a chorus of agreement between the other members on the line.

 

“We know what happened at least,” Goujin ventures, “Asuto got a message from someone he was apparently talking to about his dad, and he went out to meet his dad yesterday and, uh, yeah.” He finishes lamely, with a vague gesture to convey what exactly went down.

 

Turns out, the media has yet to find out Asuto went missing on a doomed meetup with his ‘dad,’ and the Inakuni members on the other side of the screen all look white as a sheet as they take in the information, silent until the boiling point is reached.

 

“And you let him?!” Kozoumaru explodes. The sudden outburst goes as quickly as it came, and his face falls in guilt, but it’s just enough to push the InaJapan players over the edge.

 

“It’s not like we knew! He didn’t mention anything about his dad or someone offering to find his dad – _nothing! He didn’t fucking say ANYTHING!_ ” Mansaku screams back, the raised voice and uncharacteristic swearing enough to cause silence and tension to fill the room in droves.

 

The fight leaves Mansaku too, and his shoulders sag in defeat as he presses the palm of his hands up to his eyes, “I-I was trying to _look out for him_. He’s too naïve and trusting and I wanted to make sure he wasn’t getting taken advantage of and- and I _failed.”_ He sobs, and the last word comes out as a keening wail as he tries his very hardest not to break into sobs. Iwato places his hand on Mansaku’s shoulder and gently guides him to a corner of the room away from the screen.

 

“It’s been a long night on our end.” Kirina says, sounding about ten years older, “We just woke up and it’s what, 12 over there?” he asks, and Hattori chips in to confirm that yes, it is 12pm over in Japan, and he also reveals that school’s given them all the day off should they need it.

 

“It’s all anyone will talk about at school. We’re constantly getting people coming up and going ‘you’re Inamori-kun’s friends right?’ this and ‘I’m so sorry, this must be hard’ that – it’s frustrating, but it’s what happens I guess.” Hattori concludes, and everyone else nods their head wearily.

 

“Yeah, this whole thing is a mess.” Kirina says, running his hand through his hair, letting the stress of everything finally seep into his body.

 

They hang up the call shortly after, with a vague promise to call eachother at some point in the future. The Inakuni members make their way back to the breakfast table to find it pretty much the same as they left. Ichihoshi still has that aura of despair around him, eyes glassy and distant whilst he robotically eats breakfast, with Nosaka beside him mirroring the same distant look with the notable exception of not having even touched his breakfast.

 

Suddenly, Coach returns from some important call he had regarding this whole disaster, informing the team that the police are coming over to take statements in a couple hours. He also mentions that the Football Association has put the entire tournament on hold for a week whilst the search for Asuto continues, with the America v Russia match to be the last one to play, and he adds that the police have placed the team on house arrest. Everyone half-heartedly nods, but a few people raise concerns about not being able to scope out the competition. Coach just says it’s out of his hands but he’ll try his best.

 

With that, Sekiya tells them that training’s been cancelled for today but he’ll be in the training grounds if people feel up for it, and breakfast finishes with just as much melancholy as it started.

 

Not knowing what to do, each member of InaJapan disperses to their own thing, not feeling up to anything.

 

* * *

 

Two hours pass, and true to Coach Zhao’s word, the police arrive for their interviews. It’s a lengthy and emotionally draining affair with the barrage of the usual questions, and to the surprise of nobody, it seems as if Asuto didn’t tell a soul about his contact with this obviously dubious person, for obvious reasons.

 

The police leave with the typical ‘we’ll do our best’ spiel and leave InaJapan to their torturous existence. Everyone’s on edge, and hours later, when everyone’s had something approaching enough time to emotionally recuperate, Coach gets news of a surprise visit from some of the Spain team. Not even five minutes later, Clario practically rips the door off its hinges to get inside InaJapan’s lobby, almost killing Gouenji in the process, and Endou officially enters ‘damage control’ mode.

 

“Endou.” Clario says, standing straight and eyes burning with the same intensity as when that one Spain member was revealed to work for Orion, with a not-so-subtle undercurrent of panic.

 

“Clario! I take it you saw the news?” Endou returns, standing up from his chair and walking over to Clario casually, as if Clario didn’t almost just commit manslaughter via projectile door.

 

From there, it’s a terse conversation between Clario and Endou, with Clario’s natural stoicism making the team wince with some of his remarks. He apologizes as usual, before diving right back into the conversation-turned-interrogation.

 

“While we appreciate the sentiment, what, pray tell, the fuck are you doing here, Mr. Diamond Ray?” Hiroto snaps from somewhere near the back of the room, looking just as pissed as Haizaki.

 

For a couple seconds, Clario looks genuinely surprised, until his face schools into something even more serious than ever. “Asuto went missing the same day we had our match, that isn’t a coincidence.” Clario finally drops with all the subtlety of a freight train, “may I also remind you that it was _Asuto_ who scored the goal that made you draw with us. Given how this reeks of Orion’s doing, I’d rather not take any chances.” He adds.

 

At that connection the room seems to be more distraught than before, with Ichihoshi spitting out his drink at the revelation. Endou gets out a small “Oh.” before quietly excusing himself from the room, eyes wide and white as a sheet. Roughly a minute later, what sounds like Endou’s screams can be heard from the general direction of his room, and Kazemaru runs off to check up on him.

 

“Of _course_ Orion would time it like this.” Ichihoshi finally splutters out between coughs. It causes Clario to direct his laser focus onto Ichihoshi, and that’s when Ichihoshi mentally goes ‘fuck it’ and gives a _very_ whistle-stop tour of his past with Orion. Clario vaguely looks like he’s going to throttle someone, and Ichihoshi’s money is on Asuto’s mysterious dad, if they ever do find the bastard.

 

At that, Clario takes his leave - complete with a “sorry about the door, Gouenji.” Which earns him an ‘it’s forgiven’ thumbs up from Gouenji, still rubbing his throat at the near decapitation. 

 

Once more at a loss for what to do, InaJapan hums and hems and haws on the matter.

 

* * *

 

It’s some point around midday when the America v Russia match is over that the world seems to collectively speed up.

 

It starts with Ichinose and his gaggle of friends appearing at the doorstep of the Kazan Soccer Centre apropos of nothing, looking frazzled in the typical post-game adrenaline. They address the team with a polite greeting before promptly whisking Endou away to have a more personal talk about more Asuto-related events.

 

The impromptu Ichinose-Endou therapy session finally kicks the team awake somewhat, and Hikaru has decided that he’s fucking _had it_ with all the waiting with no clear objective, picking up his laptop and power-walking to his room.

 

An hour into Hikaru’s search, his phone rings, and Hikaru doesn’t even need to look at the phone to tell it’s Froy.

 

“Unless this is about Asuto, _I don’t want to hear it.”_ Hikaru immediately says with more venom than he was intending, and he can practically feel Froy flinch on the other side.

 

“Aha, yeah, I figured.” Froy replies lamely, his usual chatterbox style gone, “I’ve, uh, seen the news?” He tries, and it only makes Hikaru want to crush his phone in his grip.

 

Sensing Hikaru’s frayed nerves, Froy continues on, “I mean I don’t need to have seen the news since it was, y’know, _Orion_ and all, but,” and here, a deep breath, “how are you holding up?” Froy asks, and the fact that he says it in Japanese is already a bad sign.

 

(Some point into their friendship, once Ichihoshi had a solid grasp of Russian, they decided they’d switch languages as a primitive attempt of a secret code – Froy would speak Japanese, and Ichihoshi would speak Russian. It’s kept a lot of their conversations secret from prying ears.)

 

“Terribly,” Hikaru answers in Russian, and it’s the truth, “No Mr.Shinjou? He’s pretty much the only one apart from me who really speaks Japanese.”

 

“Nah, he’s off doing some press conference on behalf of the FA about, y’know, _the thing._ Nobody here to know what I’m saying. Also no offence but your Russian is _terrible_.” Froy answers, the last part a poor attempt at a joke, which Hikaru plays along with if only to keep his mind distracted.

 

“Well good thing you can include me on the list of people who can’t understand your Japanese, eh?” Hikaru retorts, and the overdramatic fake noise of shock Froy makes in response bubbles a quiet laugh out of Hikaru.

 

“Listen here young man _me and the Duolingo owl would like to have some words with you-“_ Froy says, and he rambles on and on about the Duolingo owl until Hikaru is quietly laughing, and it grounds him a little bit more.

 

“But in all seriousness, are you really okay? I know I’ve asked like five times but I just want to be sure. Also listen I _know_ we’re technically enemies given the tournament but dude, your teammate got kidnapped.” Froy probes, suddenly serious, and it sours Hikaru’s mood a bit.

 

“Yeah, I guess I’m doing as best as I can be?” He answers, and Froy doesn’t respond verbally, instead giving _The Non-committal Hum_. It’s the hum that Froy uses whenever he wants to desperately say something heavy but doesn’t know how, and it sets Hikaru on edge.

 

“Froy. _What is it.”_ He whispers into the phone, and the shaky, anxious laugh Froy makes in response makes Hikaru hold his breath.

 

“Yeah it’s just, I-I was thinking of the whole thing – the Asuto thing – and, and I was in the building at the time.” He finally forces out, and Hikaru can imagine Froy running his hand through his hair in stress, “I didn’t _see_ anyone but I _heard_ someone that sounded like him sobbing. You’d think they’d chloroform him if only to keep the noise down, b-but they didn’t! Whatever they’re doing to him, they want him to feel all of it.” He finally finishes his rant, breathless and voice high-pitched towards the end.

 

A full ten seconds pass in silence, and Hikaru is trying desperately hard not to break down.

 

“Hey Hikaru? Are you okay- oh shit I really shouldn’t have said that.” Froy starts, and promptly panics once he hears Hikaru’s sobs come out in sharp gasps. Froy starts rambling about nothing in particular in an attempt to distract and ground Hikaru as the latter slowly comes undone, sobs bursting out of his chest in staccato stabs.

 

After who knows how long, the torrent of emotions has left Hikaru, leaving him emotionally drained and face itchy with tears. Froy’s endless rambling about the state of his houseplants pitters off to an anticlimactic end, leaving an atmosphere charged with numbness and a silence that stretches out between the two.

 

“I hate this.” Hikaru finally croaks, “I hate everything about this.”

 

“Yeah, me too,” Froy whispers back, “Whenever I try to pull up any information about it I get shut out, it’s weird; I had no trouble getting info on you.”

 

“This is my fault,” Hikaru blurts out on impulse, and he takes Froy’s confused pause as an opportunity to press on, “I betray Orion, and then they kidnap Asuto? That’s not a coincidence. Even if it has nothing to do with me, I didn’t learn where he was going until it was too late. If I’d caught him in time he’d be safe.”

 

“Maybe so,” Froy responds, “Maybe he would’ve been okay, but it’s too late to dwell on the past I guess. Besides, while I can’t get anything concrete, the rumours floating about aren’t exactly pretty, but they at least exonerate you.” He adds, and gives a quick rundown on what the rumours contain.

 

The rumours are just that – rumours. They range from the incredibly bizarre to the horrifyingly graphic, encompassing the spectrum of Asuto’s dad whisking him off to Cuba all the way to Asuto having been used as fertiliser for the Chairman’s perennials. They’re all ridiculous and with no hint of truth, but maybe thoughtless gossip is what the two need.

 

“Alright, I’m gonna leave you to rest now since you need it. You look after yourself, okay? I’m gonna try to get more info but I’m gonna have to get it from Shinjou and that’s like prying teeth from someone with no teeth. Speak soon!” Froy finally says, and hangs up the call shortly thereafter.

 

Now left to his own devices, Hikaru continues his search, Froy’s words echoing around his mind.

 

* * *

 

The next time they’re all in the same room is at dinnertime, and even that’s a subdued affair, giant appetites be damned. Nobody really strikes up a full conversation, too scared to break the fragile peace while it lasts. The second something even looks like it could rabbit-hole down to Asuto, everyone slams the breaks on the conversation and kills it then, inavertedly creating a landmine of conversation topics – the only safe topic seems to be the weather, and that died roughly two minutes in when Ichihoshi pointed out how sunny it was today, and everyone collectively remembered just who had gone missing. Either through not noticing or not wanting to ask, nobody questions Ichihoshi and his more red-rimmed eyes.

 

Once dinner is finished the team is herded off to the field for a meeting. Contrary to the team’s belief, it’s _not_ about Asuto, but instead about the new member, Afuro “Aphrodi” Terumi. He descends from the heavens with elegance, and introduces himself. He’s met with enthusiasm from Endou, and the team offers greetings and welcomings with varying enthusiasm, too drained from everything to put their heart into it. Aphrodi doesn’t mind, having already heard the news a thousand times over by now, instead saying he’ll help in any way he can.

 

Once Aphrodi gets properly inducted and the meeting ends, everyone breaks off to their respective haunts. Except for Ichihoshi, who instead grabs his laptop, charger and a couple notebooks from his dorm and walks downstairs to the living room area, plugs his laptop into a socket near the coffee table, and starts typing like his life depends on it.

 

“Ichihoshi.” Nosaka ventures from the doorway, not even bothering to make it sound like a question; he knows _exactly_ what Ichihoshi is doing. 

 

“The first 72 hours in a missing person’s case are crucial.” Is how Ichihoshi starts the conversation, already on the offensive. 

 

“It’s out of our hands, Ichihoshi. We need to leave it to the police.” Nosaka says, gently coaxing Ichihoshi’s hands away from the laptop only to have

Ichihoshi almost break his wrist in retaliation.

“The police aren’t going to do anything; Orion’s capable of evading police detection for a _reason._ ” Ichihoshi answers, shaking his head in defeat. It takes all of two seconds for Nosaka to understand what he’s saying.

 

“The police are owned by Orion, huh?” for fuck’s sake, this whole disaster gets worse the more they uncover.

 

“Wouldn’t be surprised if they owned half the Kremlin.” Is Ichihoshi’s answer, mumbled whilst he takes a swig of apple juice. 

 

The conversation has seemingly taken a dead end, and Nosaka is thinking of something to convince Ichihoshi to not over-exert himself, when he looks at Ichihoshi’s laptop screen and sees a wall of Russian, and that’s the exact moment it clicks.

 

“You know Russian.” Nosaka says completely deadpan, blinking.

 

“I’ve lived in Russia since I was like five, what the _fuck_ did you expect Nosaka?” is Ichihoshi’s response, at the curious midpoint of ‘convinced Nosaka has completely lost the plot” and “absolutely done with everything.”

 

“Uh.” Is the incredibly eloquent response from Nosaka Yuuma, causing Ichihoshi to continue his rabbit-hole down the internet. “What does it say?” he asks, diverting the conversation.

 

“Just the usual biased tabloid gossip, but there’s gotta be something. Someone’s had to have seen him somewhere.” Ichihoshi replies, not even taking his eyes from the screen.

 

Nosaka knows a losing battle when he sees one; Ichihoshi feels at least partially responsible for Asuto’s kidnapping given his past with Orion, and as the one with the most knowledge and authority on the matter, he’s taken it upon himself to find out what just happened. Trying to convince Ichihoshi to maybe take a break from the constant worrying and research has roughly the same success rate of a dead twig turning into a forest, and Nosaka knows it. Still doesn’t mean he has to be happy about it however, and Nosaka leaves lets Ichihoshi be with a part-request part-demand for him to _please_ get some sleep.

 

Briefly, Froy’s _‘Whatever they’re doing to him, they want him to feel all of it.’_ floats into Ichihoshi’s mind.

“I’ll try.” Is his response, and it’s a complete lie.

 

* * *

 

Another day passes since the kidnapping, and InaJapan has nothing of anything to show for it.

 

It’s weird, while the one week break has caused life to slow to a crawl inside the InaJapan team, the rest of the world has done the opposite. It feels as if every five minutes there’s a new article or a new outlandish theory, and Hikaru is at his wits end trying to parse between what’s tabloid gossip and what’s an actual fact.

 

By far the most realistic theories have to do with Asuto’s dad. The internet has collectively decided that his dad had a hand in it, and the idea of mob connections gets thrown about willy-nilly between both the mainstream media and social media. The current consensus is that whoever Mr. Inamori was, he incurred the wrath of his mob boss and that Asuto payed the price for it, and Hikaru feels nauseous at how close it is to the truth – replace ‘the mob’ with ‘Orion’ and they’re probably spot-on.

 

It’s in his eighth hour of clicking between Russian and Japanese articles and forums when everyone starts to gather in the dining hall for breakfast. It’s at that moment when Nosaka finds Hikaru unmoved from the spot he last saw him, glaring at his laptop screen as if it’s personally offended him. With all the bullshit Hikaru’s had to read, it basically has.

 

“Did you even sleep?” Is all Nosaka asks in the most deadpan tone possible as he makes a beeline to the watermelon slices, Nishikage following behind him.

 

“I closed my eyes at one point.” Is Hikaru’s equally deadpan response. Just like Hikaru expected, it makes Nosaka practically materialise in front of Hikaru, watermelon slice in hand, as he fixes Hikaru with the most disappointed glare possible. “Just kidding. I got like, three hours maybe.”

 

“We have training today.”

 

“I’ll be fine.” Oh boy, isn’t _that_ the biggest lie Hikaru’s ever told. The glaringly obvious eyebags aren’t really helping either.

 

Sure enough, Hikaru is basically falling asleep into his cereal when he gets dragged away from the laptop screen for breakfast. The team keep asking him why he didn’t sleep and if he’s okay and up for training today, and his sleep deprived death glare shuts them up enough.

 

However, it’s after breakfast that things finally start to look up. Hiroto of all people calls a team meeting in the common room, in front of a whiteboard with ‘Inamori Asuto’ scribbled on the top currently being wheeled in by Haizaki. Hikaru, and Nishikage sit on the couch at the front with Mansaku and Kirina on the edges and Nosaka demonstrating his weird sitting habits near the middle. The rest of the Inakunis fan out from there, with everyone else sitting wherever is closest to them. Endou and Gouenji are on a table by the side, next to a tablet in a video call with Kidou, who looks furious at nobody in particular.

 

“Alright, it’s been a day and I’m done moping,” is how Hiroto starts the meeting, “does anybody have any theories? Any idea what’s happened?” he asks the room at large.

 

“Asuto said he was meeting up with his father after this mysterious third party got in contact with him, and the rest is history.” Nosaka pipes up, reciting the facts everybody knows by now.

 

“Of course, there’s always the question of what Orion actually wants with him, and if this father thing is even real.” Haizaki interjects, writing ‘Possibilities’ on the whiteboard.

 

“It’s probably real; I can’t see Orion doing all this with the knowledge about Asuto’s family unless his dad was involved or this third party was getting it from Asuto.” Ichihoshi says, rubbing his eyes in a vain attempt to stay alert, “I also doubt they’re turning him into an Orion Disciple either - if they wanted to do that, then they would have just sent someone to pretend to be his father and groomed him from there.” He adds as an afterthought, seeing Mansaku wince at the implications.

 

 “Ah, so the ex-Orion member knows how they tick, huh?” Hiroto says, attention to Ichihoshi, “What about you, Mr. All Nighter? Find anything useful?” he asks, leaning down to Hikaru’s reclaimed spot on the couch.

 

“Not a lot actually, I’m afraid,” Hikaru starts with a shake of his head, “The most I could find was a Wikipedia article about a soccer player who shared the same surname.” He adds, about to recount his internet deep-dive until Kirina cuts him off.

 

“Asuto’s mom left him a letter explaining that his dad was a soccer player that’s playing abroad!” Kirina reveals, “Asuto never got a name or anything, but it still narrows down the possibilities considerably.”

 

The room collectively perks up at the new lead, up until Ichihoshi shakes his head, “The only person I could find was this dude called ‘Inamori Takuma’ on Wikipedia, and the article barely had anything on Asuto or his mom, just a footnote about how his child was born around the same time Asuto was.” He sighs while sinking into his seat, rubbing his eyes.

 

Suddenly, the door knocks, and in steps Kazeaki Yone, looking tired and haggard, face worn with pain.

 

“I’m afraid you’re not going to find a lot there, dearie.” She says softly, with eye bags under her eyes. Her hair’s a mess and her clothes are wrinkled, clearly stressed about Asuto, “Asuto’s father tried his best to keep out of the public eye.”

 

“I hope I’m not intruding,” she starts, walking over to the couch to plop herself next to Ichihoshi, Nosaka having left the couch to make room for her, “I just thought I’d have some useful information on Asuto’s dad, given how I knew the man.” She explains, and the room collectively jumps at the revelation.

 

“I’m sorry it’s taken me until now to come forward, I’ve just been so frazzled with everything that’s happened.” She apologises, and her eyes become glazed over with memory before adding a quiet “where do I even begin?”

 

After taking a while to compose herself, she starts, “Him and Yuriko met sometime in Tokyo when he was at the height of his career, playing for Dawn Risers. Yuriko used to be a journalist – a damned good one too – and she noticed how much he hated the press conference and approached him to bond over their shared hatred of the media, and things somehow snowballed from there. About four years later, they were married and Asuto was on the way.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Ichihoshi suddenly interjects, looking paler, “Did you say the _Dawn Risers?”_ He asks, and his eyes glaze over in despair at Yone’s nod, “my dad was on that team.” He chokes out, and Yone frowns in sympathy as the words sink in.

 

“I knew you looked familiar. Takuma was best friends with your father, if I recall correctly.” She sighs, and then spots the tears starting to gather in Ichihoshi’s eyes, “Do you want to step out?” she asks, and at Ichihoshi’s nod she continues her story, with a soft little ‘just say the word if you need to leave dearie.’

 

“Right, where was I? Takuma was an endlessly private man, he always hated the fame and status that came with being a professional soccer player, and he just wanted to play for the fun of it. Honestly, the only similarities between him and Asuto is their love of soccer, everything else is entirely different. Just a while after Asuto was born, he got scouted by an overseas team in Russia.

Takuma wanted more than anything to continue his career, but Yuriko was already worn down from life in Tokyo and couldn’t follow him overseas, so they parted ways and Yuriko took Asuto to her home island of Inakunijima. By that point there wasn’t really any love in the relationship, at least on Yuriko’s side, but they still kept in contact online, mostly by sharing cute pictures of Asuto.

 

“It all seemed to be okay, but then.” Yone suddenly stops, gulping, “When Asuto was around six, Takuma left a frantic voicemail about how it was too dangerous for Yuriko to keep in contact with him, and just vanished. Blocked Yuriko’s number and changed his, changed his name and just disappeared. Yuriko didn’t understand why until she got the notification about Ichihoshi’s accident, and pieced things together from there.

 

At first she went to the police with her concerns, but it never went far. Eventually she got fed up and put her journalism skills to use and did some research on Takuma.” Yone finally explains, fidgeting with her cardigan sleeves out of nerves.

 

“And that lead her to Orion.” Nosaka says quietly, and Yone simply nods in response.

 

“She found him on their employee list, using his mother’s maiden name, Shinjou. The stress of what she found – and what she couldn’t – made her health worse and she had to stop.” She adds, “It ate at her, I think. The knowing but not knowing.”

 

Once all the truth is out, the room is silent, despondent, with everyone taking the history of Asuto’s family in their own little way. The Inakuni portion of the team in particular appear to be at the curious intersection of shock and rage, with Mansaku and Kirina at the former end and Haizaki very much at the latter. For the next couple minutes, the team at large bounce back half-hearted ideas and poorly thought possibilities about Asuto’s father and Asuto’s fate, weighed down with the knowledge that they now bear. Once it’s clear that they’re getting nowhere Coach calls an end to the meeting, and everyone disperses to their own means. Now it’s just Hikaru, Nosaka and Nishikage left, and Nosaka is about to ask Ichihoshi if he’s okay before Ichihoshi beats him to it.

 

“I always thought it was odd, Orion whisking off a random injured kid like me all the way to Russia just to make me one of their Disciples,” he says monotonously, “But I guess I wasn’t as much of a random kid as I thought I was. Fuck, Orion probably staged the crash and everything.” He breathes out, covering his hand with his mouth as the breakdown he was repressing throughout Yone’s story finally rises to the surface, sobs halting through his breathes as Nosaka rubs his back in an awkward attempt at sympathy and Nishikage once again gently coaches him through a meltdown.

 

Misery hangs in the air, and Shinjou Takuma is the cause of it.

 

* * *

 

Shinjou Takuma is trying _oh so very hard_ not to think about certain things. It's not working all that well.

  
  
He can't help it; whenever he can grab a spare moment to pause, his brain wanders to the solitary confinement cell way underground where his son is and he makes a pained noise. Sometimes, when his mind is really in a mood, it'll instead wander to Asuto's sobs as he was being dragged away, and it takes everything Shinjou has not to scream right then and there.

  
  
He doesn't want to know the exact particulars of what they're doing to Asuto, instead preferring the bliss of ignorance, but Bernard Girikanan is a psychopath, and a sadistic one at that. He keeps offhandedly mentioning it to Shinjou whenever they have a spare moment together, and Shinjou can tell the bastard's sorely enjoying the visible tension in his body as he does it.

  
  
"His hissatsus are mostly electric-based," Bernard mentions a day into the whole shitfest, "I thought it'd be pretty funny, don't you think?" he asks, even though both of them know he is neither expecting nor wanting an answer.

  
  
And really, that's the big problem here: Bernard Girikanan. This whole ordeal started because he somehow found out about the family Shinjou had taken painstaking care to hide, to _protect_ , and was - for lack of a better word - _pissed_. Bernard expects full loyalty from all his employees, and that includes Mr. Right Hand Man Shinjou Takuma. He knows he shouldn't, but Shinjou thanks anyone that might be listening that he had the hindsight to bug his son's phone as a failsafe; if Bernard was to ever find his family, then the blatant display of Orion-aligned morality would act as a sort of peace offering in the hopes that Bernard would at least go slightly easier on his family. It worked, surprisingly - Bernard was actually pleased at Shinjou blatantly going against his moral code that it's now 'just' torture. Torture that Bernard says is also the logical conclusion of Orion’s usual tactics not working against Inazuma Japan.

 

"You know, you can always visit him. We still have a few hours before the next round." Bernard offers as casually as if he was talking about the weather and not torturing a thirteen year old. As far as Bernard is concerned, they might as well be the same thing. 

  
  
Regardless, Shinjou takes him up on the offer, going down to Asuto's cell twenty minutes later. Unlike all the other times he's been forced to walk past the cell - courtesy of Bernard - there's been the sound of faint sobbing coming from it, but now it's dead quiet, and Shinjou doesn't quite know what to make of it. 

  
  
For all Shinjou knows, Asuto finally succumbed to the injuries and died. Shinjou makes a loud, pained noise at the thought. 

  
Steeling himself, Shinjou enters the room, holding his breath. The first thing he notices is how _small_ the room is, and how bare it is, with the fancy-looking TV providing no comfort now that Shinjou knows what it's for. The second thing he notices is Asuto himself, asleep on the bed, face rested in pain and despair and slightly curled in on himself. Shinjou makes his way over to Asuto and sits himself onto the bed and gets a good look at the son he hasn't seen in more than a decade. 

  
  
Looking closer, Shinjou can see the still wet tear tracks that run down Asuto's cheeks and how puffy his eyelids are in the telltale signs of recent crying. Asuto's hair is a mess, unwashed and dishevelled, and his clothes are wrinkled and the same ones he stepped through Orion's doors in. Even in sleep Asuto doesn't look okay, eyebrows pinched and face contorted in pain. Looking at it now, the full reality of it hits Shinjou, and tears start welling in his eyes before he can stop them.

  
  
"I'm so sorry. You don't deserve any of this." Shinjou whispers to his sleeping son as he gently starts to run his fingers through Asuto's hair the same way Yuriko did for him whenever he was ill, hoping it's anywhere near as comforting now as it was then. The most reaction Asuto gives is a slight twitch of his eyebrows and an unconscious lean into the movement. 

  
  
Completely on impulse, Shinjou leans in and plants a soft kiss on Asuto's forehead, holding it for a few seconds. It causes Asuto to stir and wake up slightly, and the quiet, tired "Mom?" he slurs out breaks Shinjou's heart all over again. It breaks even more when Asuto reaches out to Shinjou with one arm like the scared, small child he is, and the tears in Shinjou's eyes finally spill over. 

  
  
Asuto simply mumbles something that sounds like "don't cry, Mom." and that's the exact moment the last tatters of Shinjou's composure evaporate, and he knows he needs to leave _right now,_ before Asuto - his own ray of sunshine - wakes up more. 

  
With a slight edge of panic, Shinjou quickly gets up and leaves the room, abruptly stopping the comforting motions he was making. It makes Asuto, still in the barely-awake haze, whimper as he blindly reaches out for the warm body offering comfort, and start to cry out when nothing but empty air meets him. Shinjou has to clamp down on every impulse to run back in and never let his son go as he closes the door with more force than was probably necessary, leaving Asuto once again all alone in his misery, with Asuto's desperate pleads faintly bleeding through the door. 

  
  
He fucked up. He _more_ than fucked up. He fucked up the moment he accepted the offer from the overseas team, and on some level he knew it back then but was too hopped up on excitement to stop and think. And now he's here, learning his wife is dead months after the fact and his son - a _child_ \- kidnapped and tortured by Orion, and now he has to live with the hole he dug for himself.

  
  
Misery hangs in the air, and Shinjou Takuma is the cause of it.

 

* * *

 

The next time Hikaru wakes up – after yet another all nighter – the world is completely different.

 

The media somehow got their hands on the fact that Asuto’s mom died quite a while back and that he was on a rendezvous with his dad when he went missing, and one unlucky redditor discovered the link between Asuto’s dad and Ichihoshi’s dad. All those new details made the already massive story on Asuto’s disappearance blow up to new heights, and now news outlets are openly debating on whether Ichihoshi’s tragedy was caused by Asuto’s dad too. The media also pounces on the obvious bureaucratic headache that was Asuto’s entire legal guardianship limbo, and Coach mentions something about a representative from the Japanese Embassy being on their way to discuss the finer details with InaJapan, but Hikaru can hardly hear it over the static in his ears as him and InaJapan eat their breakfast in silence.

 

It’s after breakfast that shit really hits the fan, when the Inakunis, Nosaka and Hikaru – the ‘Protect Inamori Asuto Squad’ – are all gathered on the pitch for some half-hearted training. Having one of your members kidnapped by Orion still means that you have a match with America in a couple days.

 

“Hey, Ichihoshi,” Mansaku says apropos of nothing, walking over to where Ichihoshi is doing some stretches, “I know this is pretty mean to ask, but what do you think’s happened to Asuto? You know Orion best after all.” he asks, and the question also attracts Kirina, who’s within earshot.

 

“He got kidnapped.” Hikaru snips back, still messed up from the news this morning. The answer makes Mansaku’s eyelid twitch in irritation as he tries to rephrase his question.

 

“No I mean- what I’m trying to say is-“ he starts, and he continues with the false starts until he just gives up and sighs, and Kirina takes over.

 

“You know Orion best, so we’re just thinking that you might have an idea of what they’re currently doing to him.” Kirina says, and it’s clear in the way that both Kirina and Mansaku look at Hikaru with uncertain hope that _maybe_ Asuto is okay.

 

“We’re approaching the 72 hour mark. After 72 hours in a missing person’s case, the chances of finding someone – let alone alive – tend to plummet. It’s 10am now and he went missing at 5pm. Unless Orion dump his body at our doorstep in the next seven hours, I can’t see them doing it at all.” Hikaru replies, voice empty and cold with the knowledge. It makes Kirina and Mansaku freeze up, eyes blowing up, and everyone else on the pitch goes dead silent. Everyone except Haizaki, who’s face twists in rage before he promptly snaps.

 

“Well then what the fuck are we waiting for?! We need to start doing more! Orion is doing who knows what to Asuto and we’re just sitting here!” Haizaki roars, the sheer volume he uses makes everyone jump.

 

“We can’t do anything-“ Kirina starts before getting interrupted by Haizaki yet again.

 

“Like hell we can’t! We know about his dad and we know about Orion, so why aren’t we fucking doing anything with that!” Haizaki screams, and something – probably the last threads of Hikaru’s composure – finally snaps.

 

_‘Whatever they’re doing to him, they want him to feel all of it.’_

 

 _“If you want to go look for his body, be my guest.”_ Hikaru bites, voice dripping with venom. “We weren’t going to get him back unless Orion wanted us to, and he’s probably been used as fertiliser for the Chairman’s perennials by now.” He spits out, glaring intensely at Haizaki as if he’s the source of all his suffering. Haizaki’s face goes blank for a brief second before morphing into something well past the point of unimaginable rage, and Hikaru barely has time to blink before Haizaki punches him square in the face at full power with a pained scream. He falls to the floor, holding a hand to his now bloodied nose as Mansaku physically restrains Haizaki from pummelling Hikaru into the dirt.

 

The commotion gets the attention of the others, and Sekiya is by Hikaru’s side soon enough as Gouenji drags Haizaki aside and gives him the yelling of a lifetime. Hikaru gets sent to the infirmary as Haizaki is dragged to Coach Zhao’s office, with a tangible sense of bitterness in the air.

 

* * *

 

After that entire disaster, the team is collectively on edge. News of what Hikaru said spread like wildfire, and now the team is trying to process it, to varying results. Haizaki is now on a hair-trigger temper and one bad comment away from a murder spree, and Mansaku is trying very hard to keep his crying fits in Kirina’s presence only. Hikaru is just existing in a dissociative haze, constantly looking at the clock and counting down the hours until the dreaded 72 hour mark.

 

At around lunchtime, a postman delivers a package specifically addressed to Hikaru, and he worries that it’s a bomb of some sort until he sees the ‘ichi’ kanji of his name written as if it was more of a forward slash, and immediately knows it’s Froy. Still has some reservations about it being a bomb though.

 

It’s not, however – it’s instead a steel baseball bat, with ‘Omae Wa Mou Shindeiru’ engraved on it. The only explanation is a note from Froy asking Hikaru to ‘please beat the bastard’s teeth in, okay?’ Froy never specified which bastard, but it’s not that hard to guess all things considered.

 

“So, Froy, eh?” Hiroto ‘casually’ brings up once Hikaru’s observed the bat, and the way he tries to sound as incurious as possible has Hikaru shoot him a deadpan look.

 

“Yeah, Froy.” Hikaru snarks, with more ice than he was meaning to, and Hiroto shoots him a deadpan look back.

 

“What’s he like? You two obviously know eachother if he’s sending you presents.” Hiroto ventures, sounding genuinely curious.

 

“We met at an Orion training facility. His status as a member of the Girikanan family that founded Orion put him at odds with everyone else, who avoided him out of fear he’d like, ruin their life or something,” Hikaru starts, experimentally swinging the bat, “at least that’s what I assume, I was too much of a little shit to really care about anyone else and their opinions on others. That actually helped, since it meant I just didn’t give a shit about Froy’s status. He actually taught me Russian once Shinjou had taught me enough to understand what people were saying.

 

“We’ve been eachother’s friends since then – the other’s _only_ friends, since Froy was isolated from his peers due to the whole Girikanan thing, and I was an angry little shit who pushed everyone away. We played on the same teams and everything. He was super naïve at the start, and didn’t even know that there was such a thing as non-Orion soccer, which I introduced him to. After that he’s been at odds with the idea of Orion as a whole, and sorta used me as a venting board for his family issues.”

 

“He doesn’t get along well with his family?” Hiroto asks with an all-too-knowing grimace, and Ichihoshi snorts at the question.

 

“Pfft, Froy has a better familial relationship with the goddamn _interns,_ they treat him better too. I don’t know the exact details since I never asked and he never told but I know he has an older brother who’s been slowly taking the reins of Orion for a while now.” Hikaru shrugs.

 

“Huh, interesting.” Hiroto says, then a _look_ crosses his face, “Bad question I know, but, uh, _what about Mr. Shit Dad?_ ” he ventures, body poised to sprint out the room as if he’s expecting Hikaru to take a swing at him for the question.

 

Hikaru takes a second to pause and gather his thoughts before answering, “I can’t see him helping do it – _this_ , I mean,” He starts, making a vague hand gesture to illustrate his point, and the whole thing quickly becomes a panicked ramble, “He’s the only one at Orion who seems to be a halfway decent person. Us disciples never really saw him that much given that he’s the second in command of the entire organisation, but he was always so _kind._ Fuck, he acted like such a dad with all of us that it’s an inside joke between the Disciples – ‘Dad-san,’ we’d call him. One time I actually called him that to his face and Froy’s still laughing about it.

 

“A-And! He was always so much fonder with me? But with a tinge of guilt maybe? It was so obvious that I was his favourite and nobody knew why! We just assumed it was because he taught me Russian and integrated me into life in Russia _._ There was literally no way for us to know it was because he was my dad’s friend. Did he have a hand in the crash? Does he feel guilty about it? Is _that_ why he was so kind to me? I don’t know! I know the bastard more than his own fucking son and _I still don’t know!_ Y’know that press conference? The one the Football Association did in regards to Asuto? _Shinjou_ was the spokesperson. He looked so distressed, but in that _Shinjou_ way where it’s not obvious unless you know where to look. I can’t even rewatch it now that I know _he’s Asuto’s dad.”_ He finishes, out of breath from the impromptu rant, hand through his hair. “I don’t know where I was going with that, I think I just needed it off my chest. Thanks for listening.”

 

“Wow, uh. No problem dude,” Hiroto states, blinking rapidly “He sounds like a, uh, _complicated_ person for sure.”

 

“I’m going to beat the fucker’s teeth in the next time I see him.” Hikaru seethes, holding up the bat for emphasis.

 

“Please do. Are you sure you know how to use that thing?” he asks, pointing at the bat.

 

Hikaru just gives a shrug before putting the bat down, “I didn’t beat up those thugs I sent on Endou using just my feet.” He says as easy as one would about the weather, and a sick part of him enjoys the face Hiroto makes.

 

* * *

 

The dreaded 72 hour mark arrives – 5pm on the third day; Inamori Asuto has officially been missing for 72 hours, and now it’s less a question of looking for him as it is praying for Orion to dump his body at their doorstop.

 

And as if this day couldn't possibly get any worse than it already has, Sekiya walks in holding his tablet, face pale and lips pressed in a thin line. He says that he was recently looking at the data transmissions in the camp, and found that the anomalously large amount of data being sent out - presumably from this mystery spy - disappeared at the same time Asuto did. It takes a grand total of five seconds for the implications of that to set in, and it's almost impressive how InaJapan - specifically the Inakunis, and even more specifically Haizaki - go from despair to unfathomable outrage in mere seconds. Hikaru is too busy recalculating everything about the last three days with the knowledge that  _Asuto was the leak_ to actually pay attention to anything more, but he thinks he sees Haizaki try and cave Fudou's skull in when the latter suggests that Asuto was with Orion the whole time and the kidnapping was an elaborate cover-up. Hikaru joins in, having completely checked out three days ago.

 

Throughout the rest of the four days they have to prepare for their next match, Hikaru tries very, very hard to avoid looking at any of the Inakunis, but it never lessens his despair and it sure as hell doesn't lesson theirs. Now all they can do is prepare for their match with America and hope for the best, and InaJapan reluctantly redirects their energy to preparing for the match.

 

Nobody really puts their all into it, too wrapped up in private misery.

 

* * *

 

Asuto doesn’t know how long he’s been here, and neither does he know how much longer he will be here.

 

All he knows is that his arms are slightly numb all the time, and his hair and clothes are a mess, and that he’s subconsciously developed a habit of crying as little as possible to avoid the constant thirst and headaches. He’s been staring at the wall for so long that the textures on the concrete are basically moving, and the walls are getting closer and closer no matter how hard Asuto tells himself they aren’t.

 

In between the unpredictable bouts of torture, Asuto’s had more time to think than he’s ever wanted, and he’s spending it getting himself tied in knots. He circles back to his dad – _Shinjou Takuma_ – and every interaction they’ve had together, going over each and every one with a fine-toothed comb for any hint at what Shinjou’s true intentions were, at _what Asuto did wrong_. Because that’s got to be what happened, right? Asuto must have done something that got him on his dad’s – or even Orion’s – bad side, he must have done something to deserve this, because there’s simply no other explanation. Bad things happen to good people for sure, but not as bad as _this_. Maybe it was just being born. Maybe it was saving Ichihoshi. Maybe it was agreeing to exchange contacts with the man that turned out to be his dad.

 

Maybe it really is all just for the hell of it, but Asuto can’t imagine the same organisation that’s still feeding him and keeping him alive despite all this to be as sadistic as that, logic be damned.

 

Has his team noticed he’s gone? Has enough time passed for them to even notice? _Do they even care?_ He really doubts it, given his performance in the team. He’s not a spectacular tactician like Nosaka or Ichihoshi, neither is he an incredible striker like Haizaki or Atsuya, and he sure as hell isn’t a skilled goalkeeper like Endou.

 

More and more often, Asuto keeps thinking of his mom, going through their best moments together as a desperate way to cling to something. More than anything, he wants his mom back. He wants to be back on Inakunijima playing soccer without a care in the world, completely unaware of the Orion Foundation and his dad’s existence, with a _mom that’s still alive, damnit._

 

They’ve finally ran out of InaJapan’s matches in the tournament to replay, and the barest flicker of hope that this nightmare is over starts to burn in his chest, but it dies once that forsaken tv turns on, and a cold feeling of numb despair starts to take over as Asuto sees that they’re now playing all the Inakuni matches now.

 

He doesn’t know _why_ Orion is doing this, and he doesn’t know _who_ that mysterious person that visited him was, and he _doesn’t know what he did wrong._

 

* * *

 

The day of the America match arrives, and it’s a mixed bag for sure.

 

Not only do they have to deal with Asuto’s disappearance - missing for a _week_ now - but Orion pulled the rug out from them yet again in the form of Navy Invader replacing Star Unicorn the day before the match, leaving InaJapan completely in the dark strategy wise.

 

It all seems to be going well, up until they bring the landmines out. Fudou is their first victim, and the sheer act of brutality on Navy Invader’s part, coupled with all the shit InaJapan is already dealing with, causes the public to _snap_. The boos are loud enough to drown out Ichihoshi’s thoughts, and a gang of what can only be described as football hooligans storm the pitch and punch the referee unconscious, red-carding the shit out of the entire Navy Invader team. It doesn’t do much, only putting the match on pause for twenty minutes whilst they find a replacement referee, but it’s nice to know that the public is on InaJapan’s side.

 

(Ichihoshi briefly wonders what Asuto’s doing if he’s even still alive, and if he’s watching the match live. Little does Ichihoshi know, Asuto is, and is screaming as yet another shock is applied to him all the while.)

 

The match resumes, and Navy Invader continue their landmine spree, targeting Kirina and – in an _incredible_ dick move – Sakanoue. They’re apparently just practice landmines, and the victims will only suffer a copious amount of bruises and scratches, but it still makes everyone on InaJapan collectively thirst for vengeance. Mansaku looks the most pissed, and nobody can really blame him – first Asuto, then Kirina. If Ichihoshi didn’t know any better, he’d say Orion is targeting Mansaku specifically with how badly they’ve hurt his friends.

 

Regardless, the match goes much better after that – Aphrodi, Hiroto, and Iwato’s hissastu is a success – admittedly with them breaking the police sanction on leaving the sports grounds – and Ichinose and co return to the America team mid-match, and they eventually turn Navy Invader to the good side. InaJapan wins the match by 4-3, and Mansaku’s bloodlust is now mostly sated now that Navy Invader have defected from Orion.

 

And yet, it feels empty. InaJapan boards the coach back to the Kazan Sports Centre, Inamori Asuto nowhere in sight. Ichihoshi wonders if they’ll find his body dumped on their doorstep, but only for a moment.

 

* * *

 

At 2am that night, the world once again implodes. This time, however, for the better.

 

It starts with Hikaru lying face up in his bed, staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. Even though they won the match Hikaru isn’t as happy as he probably should be; three of their members got _landmined_ , on top of Asuto’s disappearance, and it was all due to Orion. Hikaru keeps replaying the events of the past week, constantly returning to when Nosaka asked about the rendezvous location what feels like forever ago, far too late to do anything. He analyses it from every angle and every perspective he can think of, but can’t think of any way to rationalise Asuto walking out the door that day as anything but Hikaru’s fault. Hikaru was the Orion Disciple who Asuto helped break away from. Hikaru was the one who defected from Orion. Hikaru was the only one who knew the significance of that address, and if he had just known – if _Hikaru_ was there to ask instead of _Nosaka_ – then this whole tragedy would have been averted. 

 

_Asuto would still be alive._

 

Hikaru’s not going to get any sleep in this state and he knows it. Making sure not to wake up Iwato, Hikaru moves to his desk and quietly boots up his laptop, intending to do some more useless research on Asuto to pass the time and numb his brain enough so he can hopefully fall asleep. Heaven knows Sekiya is one sleep-deprived Hikaru away from just tying him to the bed and forcing him to sleep.

 

His desk is right in front of the window, giving him a clear view of the street outside the Kazan Sports Centre, and instinct is telling Hikaru to _watch out_ , and he can’t tell if it’s just the usual hypervigilance or something else. Regardless, Hikaru keeps constantly flicking his eyes to the window and looking at the street in front of him.

 

Instinct proves to be right, as at one point Hikaru catches the flash of _something_ out the corner of his eye, and he snaps his head to the window to get a better look. The darkness makes it hard to pick out exact details, but the illumination provided by the nearby streetlights helps him spot two men in black suits and sunglasses, one thin and blond and the other stocky and- _Oh god._ They’re those two Orion grunts (they _still_ work there?) that always get given the most work, Hikaru’s seen them countless times but never caught their name. Regardless, they’re _Orion_ , and they’re approaching the entrance to the sports centre.

 

_And they’re carrying a large, human-sized sack._

 

Mind blank and veins iced in panic, Hikaru shoots up from his desk, grabbing the baseball bat beside him, and sprints out his room and down the hallway as fast as his legs will carry him, crashing into walls and random objects in his panic. He doesn’t even bother being quiet – _there’s no time –_ and he wakes up at least three people in his mad dash. He practically leaps down the stairs two at a time and gets to the front door in time to hear the resounding click of it being unlocked.

 

Shelving the fact that the grunts have the keys to the door away for another day, Hikaru violently kicks open the door with a yell and channels all his strength into the swing at the first grunt he sees – the blonde one. The bastard has sharp enough instincts to react to the bat, but not sharp enough instincts to fully avoid it, and the bat shatters his sunglasses as it travels across his face and breaks his nose. The bastard drops his end of the sack with a sharp cry of pain as he covers his eyes with his hands. _Good._ Hikaru uses the momentary surprise of the other grunt to get in an equally brutal swing at the neck, and the grunt heaves a pained wheeze as his throat gets a steel bat collide into it, dropping his end of the sack as he stumbles to catch his breath. The sack falls to the ground with a thud, and the vague shape of it and the apparent weight means that there’s _definitely_ a body in there, and Hikaru’s rage burns even brighter as he keeps swinging the now bloodied bat at the grunts, fuelled by adrenaline.

 

The grunts _unfortunately_ manage to escape, the stockier one dragging the blonde one away as they run into the night. There’s a commotion behind Hikaru now, the whole team having been woken up from the noise, and Hikaru ignores Hiroto’s ‘Christ, you really have a strong arm, huh?’ as he runs over to the sack, bat hastily discarded as he unties the knot with fumbling hands.

 

And sure enough, the first thing that greets Hikaru is Asuto’s face, bruised and scratched and pale, eyes closed and mouth partially open and face set in pain. Breath now caught in his throat, Hikaru pulls away more of the sack, and practically cries when he sees the soft, steady rise and fall of Asuto’s chest. He’s still in the same clothes he was wearing when he left, and there’s the telltale scent of chloroform still lingering on his body, but Asuto’s _alive_ , Orion be damned.

 

_‘Whatever they’re doing to him, they want him to feel all of it.’_

 

Not quite inside his body, Hikaru reaches out to gently touch Asuto’s face and doesn’t get any response from him, not even a twitch. Someone woke up the adults in the meantime, and now Coach Zhao and Sekiya are next to Hikaru, the former dialling the emergency services on his phone and the latter trying to drag Hikaru away from Asuto’s unconscious body, mentioning something about the recovery position. Hikaru, in his narrowing tunnel vision, swings a wild and easily dodged punch at Sekiya, every cell in his body burning with the desire to _protect Asuto from **everyone.**_ Him and Sekiya struggle for a little before Sekiya manages to coach him out of his tunnel vision, and the fight leaves Hikaru as he gets guided into the supportive arms of Nishikage while Nosaka gently murmurs words that pass over him like silt.

 

“The police are on their way, along with an ambulance,” Coach says once off the phone, eyeing Asuto worriedly, “everyone stay inside. Ichihoshi, stay here - the police are probably going to speak to you first.” He commands, and helps Sekiya set Asuto into the recovery position in preparation for the ambulance.

 

Hikaru just stands there numbly as everyone else filters inside, brain six degrees of separation away from reality. He should probably clean the blood off the bat, but that’s also probably a major obstruction of justice on his part, given how he did assault two people with a steel bat. As he’s distantly finding a way to argue his case as self-defence, the all too familiar sirens and blue strobe lights of Russian police cars and ambulances arrive. The last he sees of Asuto, he's being driven away to the nearest hospital in the ambulance, with Coach accompanying him, Sekiya having been put in charge of the team in the meantime.

 

Finally free from this nightmare, Hikaru grants himself a small mercy, and lets himself fall apart at the seams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for this mess of a chapter. Also skinny Kozoumaru huh. The reason he's in this at all is bc I really needed someone to be That Bitch during the Inakuni call and I'm just having his ridiculous skinnyfication happen after the inakuni call. Which is fucking HYSTERICAL in the context of this fic. Imagine getting lost in the mountains whilst your friend goes missing in a foreign country. Absolute madlad.


	4. For You, Asuto, There Will Always Be A Tomorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the dawn of a bright new day, Asuto wakes up again, and this time it's not to the cold walls of his cell greeting him, but instead the sterile white tiles of a random hospital.
> 
> As far as Asuto being a cosmic plaything is concerned, they're practically the same thing, and as far Orion's reach is concerned, Asuto never really left his cell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Kicks down door* *Cats On Mars starts playing* I LIVE JVBJKGJKER
> 
> Listen I know this chap isn't 14k but it IS 4k and like, I don't want y'all to have to slog thru 10k chapter after 10k chapter and that was sorta (hopefully, for the sake of the shambling corpse I call a nebulously defined update schedule) a one off.
> 
> Heads up Kimura Yousuke is in this chap bc even though he's a minor character I'm using him anyway because I am DUMB. If you don't know who he is, he's the reporter dude that follows InaJapan and is also theorised to be Asuto's dad by some people. If Yousuke is actually Asuto's father instead of Shinjou I will physically leave planet earth.
> 
> Also yes I DID use Yuriko's dying words to Asuto as the chapter title :3
> 
> Have fun!! Feel free to holler at me if you spot a typo kjevskv I'm dumb

When Asuto next wakes up, he’s in a private hospital room, and natural light streams through the curtains.

What he notices first is the weird feeling in the crook of his right elbow, a sharp presence in the constant, slight numbness in his arms. Upon inspection, it’s a cannula for the IV drip that’s attached to Asuto. The IV itself is wrapped safely under the bandages that travel across his arms, starting just below where his uniform undershirt ends and ending at the wrist. Asuto experimentally bends his arms, and doesn’t quite know how to feel about the ever-present numbness as he does so.

The next thing he notices is that Coach Zhao is in the chair next to his hospital bed, arms folded and head tilted to the side as he dozes. For all intents and purposes, it leaves Asuto more alone than he ever wants to be, yet he can’t bring himself to disturb Coach Zhao’s much-needed sleep, especially since Asuto’s the reason they’re even here in the first place.

That leaves Asuto with nothing to do but think and wait, as if he hasn’t been doing that for god knows how long. He tries to reorganise his thoughts and memories in the post-sleep grogginess, and the memory of what happened last night(?) slams into him like a freight train-

The door to the cell had finally opened after who knows how long, and Asuto barely had enough time to register what was happening before two Orion grunts had roughly picked him up and dragged him kicking and screaming to an equally suffocating concrete room, the only furniture being a cheap table and two chairs, one of which Asuto was shoved into. Shortly thereafter the door had opened, and a handsome-looking man in an indigo suit stepped in, skin pale and long white hair tied in a ponytail, carrying an air of sadism with him.

“Inamori Asuto, what a pleasure to meet you.” The mysterious stranger had said, smile pleasant in the way a rose’s thorns cut deep. Walking over to the other chair across from the table and sitting down, the man continued on, “Allow me to introduce myself – I’m Bernard Girikanan, the real chairman of the Orion Foundation.” He intoned, and Asuto could tell the other man’s taking twisted pleasure in how Asuto visibly pales and hunches into himself, trying to make himself seem small.

In the very little time that Asuto had interacted with the man across from him, he already knew he was in far more danger than he ever thought he was before. Bernard carries an air around him – a sick, twisted air that sets nerves on edge and chills the room. Everything about him is calculated, right down to the folds of the man’s blazer, and the way his eyes glint is more akin to a scientist examining a specimen than a chairman of an organisation talking to a traumatized child.

“I must say, you really don’t look like your father at all, do you?” Bernard pondered, elbows propped on the table and hands clasped together in what Asuto distantly recognised as the stereotypical villain pose.  _ Something _ flashed in Bernard’s eyes as Asuto tensed up, but it’s gone the next moment and he carries on, “regardless, I’m not here to gloat. Rather, I’m here to tell you what’s going to happen next.” He said, and his already deep voice somehow became even deeper, commanding Asuto to hang onto every word.

“Here’s what’s going to happen; we’re going to let you go and run right back to your precious team, and when the police inevitably question you on what happened, you’re not to breathe a  _ word _ about the Orion Foundation or say anything that might indicate we were involved. You can drag your father under the bus as much as you want for all I care, but just don't give out any names. Otherwise,” Bernard had warned, leaning in as the room practically dropped a few degrees, “we  _ will  _ find out, and the second we do we’re going to drag you right back here and do  _ far worse _ things to you. Understand?” He threatened, fixing Asuto with a glare that makes him freeze up in terror.

“ _ Understand?” _ He'd prompted again when Asuto didn't verbally respond, and Asuto was too frozen up to get out anything more than a terrified ‘yes, sir’ out, but it seemed to please Bernard well enough.

“Good.” Bernard had simply said, and it was the last thing Asuto registered before a rag of chloroform got pressed onto his face from behind, and he's out like a light.

 

Once the full memory passes through Asuto's mind so does everything else, and clasping his hand over his mouth is all he can do to stifle the soft sobbing coming from his throat as panic takes hold, because now he knows that there's not a single person he can trust anymore. The police are definitely in Orion's pocket if what Bernard said was true, and the hospital he's woken up in is probably also owned and controlled by Orion. Asuto briefly wonders if Coach Zhao is also in Orion's pocket too, and the mere thought of the man dozing next to him is in on the whole thing is enough to make Asuto's already frantic heart rate skyrocket as he spirals further into a panic attack. 

 

Asuto's meltdown is apparently loud enough to wake Coach up, as he snaps awake in his chair with a jolt. The moment he blinks the sleep from his eyes he's by Asuto's side, gently coaching him out of a panic attack with soft words of comfort. 

 

"I'm sorry for waking you up." Asuto croaks out after a while, when his mind has cleared and his heart rate has settled to something somewhat acceptable. 

 

"You don't need to apologise, Asuto." Coach merely responds with a casual handwave, as if to emphasise his point. 

 

"You looked like you needed the sleep though." Asuto can't stop himself from shooting back, and it makes the worried crinkle of Coach's eyebrows deepen as his face moves into a worried expression. 

 

"You got kidnapped, Asuto. A couple hours of sleep on my part is hardly anything important." Coach says, voice quiet and disturbed. 

 

Asuto merely hums in acknowledgement, not even daring to look at Coach Zhao, instead staring at his lap where his hands are scrunched into the thin Hospital blanket, not really registering anything. 

 

"Where am I?" Asuto finally asks after a lengthy silence. 

 

"One of the local hospitals in Kazan, can't pronounce the name, but it's relatively close to the Soccer Centre." Coach replies, and silence once more blankets the room. 

 

"...How long has it been?" Asuto whispers after a full minute passes in silence, scrunching his hands further into the blanket's fabric in anxiety. 

 

"You really don't know?" is Coach's immediate - and astounded - response. Once he looks at Asuto's blank face and realises that Asuto really doesn't know, he mumbles "a week. You've been missing for a week."

 

At the news, Asuto jolts. "Just a week? I thought it was way longer." he mutters to himself in quiet wonder, and Coach's eyebrows only raise in alarm. 

 

"The team's been worried sick, you know." Coach starts, shelving Asuto's lack of time-keeping away for later. Coach jumps into a very brief rundown of the last week's events, starting at when InaJapan first realised Asuto got kidnapped all the way to Asuto being dumped back at the campgrounds. 

 

"It was actually pretty incredible. Ichihoshi saw two men in black suits carrying you in a bag and just whaled on them. He's terrifying with a baseball bat, lemme tell you." Coach whispers melodramatically, unsubtly trying to cheer Asuto up. It actually works, as the mental image of Hikaru swinging a baseball bat at two grown men with deadly precision in the dead of night makes Asuto giggle, which eventually morphs into snorts of laughter. 

 

The good mood is broken when there's a knock at the door, and Asuto's mouth slams shut with an audible click as he freezes like a deer in the headlights, eyes blown wide. Two uniformed policemen step in, one tall with tan skin and brown hair, and the other average height and blonde.

 

"Hello there, Asuto." the former says in a gentle, soothing voice, "I'm Mikhail and my friend here is Alexander, and we're the detectives assigned to your case. Is it alright if we ask you a few questions?" Detective Mikhail asks, clicking his pen and opening his notebook as Asuto breaks out of his panic and nods. 

 

"Wonderful. First of all, do you mind explaining to us what happened? Start right from the beginning." the detective asks. 

 

Asuto starts right at the beginning when he got the accursed text from Shinjou and went to the location in the text message and got kidnapped, never mentioning anything about Shinjou himself. The two detectives ask him who the other person was, and Asuto does a lie by omission and merely says that it was an unnamed man who approached him in Tokyo saying he'd investigate Asuto's father. 

 

After that, Detective Mikhail asks him what happened after he got kidnapped, and Asuto has to constantly rub the tears out of his eyes as he describes what happened in brutal detail. He describes everything from the bareness of the room to the constant shocks and reruns of matches all the way down to the bare minimum amount of food to keep him just barely nourished. He's quivering with held-back tears by the end of it, and even without looking Asuto can see the look of pure horror on Coach's pale face. 

 

"We also need to ask, given all the rampant speculation, was your father involved?" Mikhail asks, eyes softening with a close approximation of sympathy.  After a couple of seconds of back and forth and weighing the pros and cons of answering that question honestly bouncing around in Asuto's mind, he figures  _ (hopes)  _ that Bernard Girikanan won't hurt Asuto for answering honestly.

 

"Yes." Asuto simply utters, and it's somehow the most broken he's ever been as he does it. 

 

Humming whilst he jots the details down, the other detective asks him if he has any specific idea of _who_ kidnapped him other than his dad, and Asuto freezes. As naive as he may have been at the start of this mess, he can tell this is a trap and they're trying to get Asuto to implicate the Orion Foundation in this, and Bernard's threat forces its way into the forefront of his mind. Would it be better to say he _doesn't_ know, or say he _does_ know but _can't say?_ Asuto decides on the latter as the dam finally breaks. 

 

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you." he grits out, using the back of his hand to wipe away the tears sprouting from his eyes. The tears just come straight back, and now Asuto can see Coach grip the arms of the chair in what is is, quite frankly, a deathgrip. 

 

"Why not?" Detective Alexander asks, prompting a mechanical whine from Asuto's throat as he hunches in on himself. 

 

"They said they'd find me if I told anyone." he whimpers as the tears start coming with more force. The two detectives pull and prod for any opening they can use to get Asuto to reveal who did it, to give out specific details and specific names. They assure him that whoever did this won't find him, that he's  _ safe _ , and Asuto doesn't buy it for a second, repeating an endless mantra of 'I can't tell you' as he comes completely undone. 

 

"With all due respect officers, I didn't realise interrogating tortured children's was part of your job." Coach steps in, rising from his chair and pushing the detectives aside to reach Asuto. 

 

"We need to know who did this to him! We can't properly begin our investigation until he tells us!" Mikhail responds, flustered. 

 

"Surely the fact that he's not saying is telling enough?" Coach responds in a tone that brokers no argument. A nurse passes by to make her routine check on the ward, and decidedly isn't pleased at what she finds in Asuto's room. After a lot of back-and-forth arguing in Russian, Mikhail and Alexander get kicked out by the nurse, who excuses herself in a poorly-veiled attempt to give Coach and Asuto some privacy. 

 

Asuto spirals further and further, and he curls into himself as broken sobs wrack his entire frame and gruesome images worm their way into the forefront of his mind. The second he feels Coach next to him he grasps Coach's coat in a vice grip, and Coach simply wraps his arms around Asuto in response, rambling on about simple mundanities as Asuto cries his heart out. Once everything's said and done and Asuto's stopped crying enough for hot shame to fill him, he apologises to Coach again, and once again Coach says it's no big deal. 

 

"Tell you what, I'm gonna go find the doctor assigned to you so we can get you all checked out and get you back to the campgrounds, okay?" Coach says, and Asuto nods in agreement. Even given Asuto's paranoia that the hospital is in on the whole thing, he just wants to go home. 

 

Coach leaves for a few minutes to hunt down someone to perform the checkup, and Asuto forces himself to tough out the mounting fear at being left alone again. Rather than give into the intrusive thoughts and ideas of Orion somehow grabbing him in the short while he's left unattended, Asuto instead dregs up the half-forgotten memories of breathing and distraction exercises Mansaku's dad used to teach him and focuses on those instead. They never really worked with six year old Asuto what with being stressed for his mom's health and all, and they don't really work now. Regardless, it's the best thing he has at the moment, and it passes the time until Coach returns with the same nurse as before and a youngful, glasses-wearing doctor. 

 

They introduce themselves as something that Asuto has no hope to pronounce - mental note: ask Ichihoshi for Russian lessons - and does a quick checkup, asking questions on how Asuto's feeling, which he answers as best as he can. The doctor's face turns grim once they get to Asuto's arms, and it turns even grimmer when he hears the method of injury. 

 

"Electric injuries are some of the most dangerous, since the true damage never shows up until much further down the line," he starts, taking Asuto's blood pressure and pulse as he talks, "electrical injuries usually show themselves not only as the burns here," he continues, pointing to Asuto's bandaged arms "but in more internal ways, such as nerve damage and cognitive problems. I'm afraid that the numbness in your arms is the result of permanent nerve damage to that area, and we'll have to arrange follow up appointments to detect anything else we missed." he elaborates, occasionally talking to the nurse about some medicine shorthand. 

 

"Will I still be able to play?" Asuto asks, reading between the lines. 

 

"Oh, most definitely, probably," the doctor responds with uncanny optimism, "if the damage was focused on your legs then it'd be a different story, although your fine motor skills and general coordination have probably been affected, especially in the arms, so any goalkeeping is out of the question. Overall though, you should be fine - and look, your vitals are fine! A small miracle, given how electric shocks usually result in cardiac problems." the doctor explains, and Asuto is vividly reminded of Kirina's detective tangents in the way the doctor conducts himself. The nurse takes pity on Asuto and steps in to explain before the doctor completely loses them. 

 

"what my colleague is  _ trying _ to say," she starts in a tone that implies that this is not the first time this has happened, "is that you should be okay to continue playing, but you need to recover first." she reassures, and Asuto visibly relaxes now that he knows that Orion hasn't  _ completely  _ ruined his career. 

 

"Indeed, you're going to need extensive follow up for this, especially if any other problems develop that we haven't noticed. We'll arrange some physiotherapy appointments for you and bring your personal trainer into the loop, and we'll also book some more general follow up appointments and send everything over to your health provider back home in Japan." the doctor says, oddly serious, fixing his glasses. 

 

"What about the mental side of things?" Coach asks, and the doctor grimaces at roughly the same time Asuto balks. 

 

"While I'm not a qualified psychiatrist and while I don't have all the information on what exactly happened, I do know that an official trauma diagnosis can only be given after at least a month has passed, but Asuto still needs to have an evaluation in the ward today." the doctor answers, turning to Coach. 

 

"I'm fine." Asuto insists, mood souring. He's really doesn't see the need for a psychological evaluation, and the doctor even said it was too early to diagnose anything for certain. It's all Asuto's fault anyway, and if Ichihoshi got over his problems on his own, then so can Asuto. If anything Ichihoshi had it  _ worse,  _ so Asuto has no excuse. 

 

"I'm afraid you can't be discharged unless you see  _ someone _ , sweetie." the nurse replies, quiet and gentle. It reminds Asuto of his mom, and his mood sours even more. 

 

"Fine." he relents, tears budding at his eyes as he looks at the bedsheets. He can feel all the adults in the room exchange looks - no doubt angry that Asuto is still bothering to be annoying - and Asuto gets led to a private room for the evaluation as the doctor and Coach break off to talk about the more logistical side of things. 

 

The evaluation is over soon enough, with the psychiatrist writing down a full three pages worth of notes, a lot of which have to do with all the comments Asuto made in regards to himself. By the time the evaluation is over it’s roughly midday and Coach - with the new addition of Kimura Yousuke - has gotten the discharge papers sorted and recorded the details of the follow up appointments and they can finally leave this goddamn hospital. Yousuke rummages through Coach’s newly-obtained neon pink duffle bag - 'Li Kobun dropped it off' - and takes a baseball cap out and hands it to Asuto. 

 

"The media are vultures." is all Yousuke says as Asuto puts the cap on, Yousuke making sure as much of Asuto’s hair as possible is tucked under the cap. 

 

Coach then takes out a spare uniform jersey from the duffle bag and hands it to Asuto, and credit where it’s due - for all the man’s eccentricities, Coach really does care, and right now care is something Asuto so desperately needs. Asuto slips the jersey on and sighs in relief when it covers his arms.

 

“You’re also probably gonna need these.” Yousuke states as he hands Asuto a pair of sunglasses even though it’s nowhere near bright enough to warrant them. 

 

Mikhail and Alexander suddenly return again to escort them back to the campgrounds, and Asuto’s trying to figure out why he’d need sunglasses is less put on hold and more forcibly removed from the forefront of his mind as panic starts to take hold. The panic grows more when he sees that they’re not going through the front door and instead going through a private backdoor. Asuto’s panicked attempts at nonverbally communicating ‘hey I think these two are going to kill us but me specifically’ are either unnoticed or blatantly ignored by Coach and Yousuke, but at least Coach offers a hand on his shoulder to ground him, which Asuto takes to like a man in the desert takes to water.

 

The growing panic at the two obviously-Orion policemen being their ride home is lessened somewhat when they step outside, and Asuto is treated to the sight of what has to be a seventy-strong mob of news reporters and interviewers crowding around the front door. In hindsight, the sunglasses and baseball cap makes sense now, given how the interviewers are obviously here for Asuto, if Coach’s not-as-subtle-as-Coach-thinks-it-is groan upon seeing the mob is anything to go by.

 

They’re guided to a nondescript police car with tinted black windows, and Asuto gets in the exact moment one of the interviewers apparently telepathically senses Yousuke - one of their own - near the car, and even amongst the stampede of noise and cameras Yousuke’s ‘Shit!’ is still very much audible, and Asuto giggles to himself as Yousuke basically swandives into the car and Mikhail floors the accelerator before the door’s even closed.

 

“Told you the media were vultures.” Is all Yousuke says, rearranging himself to actually comply with seatbelt laws, elbow occasionally meeting Asuto’s face.

 

“Bit rude of them, blocking the front entrance to the hospital.” Coach grumbles under his breath, texting Sekiya on his phone to let him know they’ll be back soon, to which Sekiya responds with a pic of Hikaru sleeping captioned 'he's finally asleep' only to send 'OH FUCK HE WOKE UP' not even ten seconds later. 

 

“Media vultures are media vultures.” Yousuke says with a shrug.

 

“Do you include yourself in that description?” Alexander jokes from the front passenger seat, obviously trying to lighten the mood, and Asuto starts hovering three feet away from his body as Yousuke goes into a long rant about how his boss assigned him this case because of all the previous interviews he’s done with Inazuma Japan. The adults in the car continue talking about various interactions with the media, all the while Asuto feels himself slip further and further away from reality, body tensing up more and more every time Mikhail or Alexander says something, coiling like a spring at its breaking point. Asuto’s mind unhelpfully gives him a list of all the ways the two policemen could murder them all right now, and his mind lingers far too long on the possibility of a car accident. Ichihoshi was involved in a car accident when he was a kid and that’s how Orion got him. Maybe it’ll be the same for Asuto.

 

Out of the corner of his eye from where Asuto’s staring at the middle of the car, he sees Mikhail give him a knowing glare from the rear view mirror, and the suffocation Asuto’s feeling increases tenfold.

 

Eventually they arrive at the Kazan Soccer Centre and the police car pulls up, and Asuto practically vaults out the car and hopes that his desperation to get out the car isn’t as obvious as he thinks it is. Asuto, Coach and Yousuke walk up to the door, and the second the police car leaves Coach places a hand on Asuto’s back as he unlocks the door to the campgrounds while Yousuke flips the bird in the vague direction of the police car.

 

The second the door opens and Asuto steps in, he’s treated to an explosion of noise and what sounds like Sekiya yelling ‘It’s not an intruder, Ichihoshi!’ as Ichihoshi sprints into the lobby, brandishing a steel baseball bat and looking incredibly sleep-deprived. The moment he sees Asuto he stops and stares, and moments later Kirina, Mansaku, Haizaki and the rest of InaJapan sprint into the room. 

 

For the briefest of seconds the world stands still, and it’s immediately followed by the Inakuni portion of the team - plus Ichihoshi, who looks like he’s about to pass out - charging at Asuto and enveloping him in a bear hug, crying - or in Goujin’s and Ichihoshi’s case,  _ sobbing _ \- out of joy. The sudden physical contact after a whole week of sensory deprivation throws Asuto for a loop, mind trying to catch up to his body and vice versa. Even still, Asuto likes it, and he seeks after the fleeting excitement of the contact as he hugs back as much as he can, something approximating melancholy laughter bubbling out of him as eyes well with tears of joy.

 

Briefly, Asuto considers that maybe, just maybe, everything will turn out okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So like, current events in the canon eps huh. Bernard Girikanan is actually a tragic and sympathetic character and not actually the raging psychopath I made him to be in this fic huh. Ina11 Bernard vs Electrostatic Naivete Bernard who would win
> 
> Also NURSE KIRINA I'M-


	5. But Still The Sun Rises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asuto is out of Orion's cell and out of the hospital, and back home with his team, the first step in a long, long road to recovery.
> 
> And yet, just because the sun still rises after every night does not mean that the darkness doesn't come creeping back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lads I know I've been gone for like 40982395903 years but i want y'all to know that this entire chapter was 23,844 words and 82 pages long on my google doc
> 
> So uh, get ready for a BUNCH of giant chapters bc I'm splitting it all up kjefkae I'm so sorry
> 
> At the very least, happy holidays and happy new year!! The fact that it's a new decade is making me TERRIFIED

After the impromptu crying hug pile session is over and done with, everyone stands back up just in time for a sneeze from Asuto to snap the room's attention back to him.

 

"Uh, whoops." he lamely says, still a little dazed at the current events - and, although he doesn't want to admit it for fear of upsetting or embarrassing Goujin, wearing a shirt that's drenched in tears.

 

Even though they're no longer in the Dogpile Of Tears™, everyone's still crowding around Asuto, pressed up against him in a rough approximation of a human shield. Despite spending the last week completely touch-starved, Asuto doesn't mind the physical contact, instead chasing the disorienting jolts of contact as far as he can, feeling a little bit disappointed whenever one of them moves or shuffles slightly.

 

There's an awkward moment where silence fills the room, everyone staring at Asuto and Asuto staring at anything else but his teammates and friends. After the emotionally charged group hug, those on the fringes - the teammates who never really knew Asuto or were close to him - are left just standing there, none of them really wanting to take the initiative and say something, lest the unofficial bodyguards around Asuto obliterate them for some careless word choice.

 

Coach takes pity on them all with a cough that instantly snaps all attention back to him, "Now then, now that that's out of the way," he starts, eyeing everyone individually before pointing an accusatory finger at the group huddled around Asuto, "did any of you sleep?" he demands, and judging by the tone he already knows the answer. And Asuto didn't previously think it was possible for a group of middle schoolers to shift their weight between their feet in perfect unison, but boy are his friends full of surprises.

 

"Everyone present right now, please raise your hand if you actually slept." Coach sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

 

Predictably, everyone _but_ the people who amass the mob around Asuto raise their hands, and the ones consisting of the group don't. The Inakunis in particular don't seem all that fussed about it, shooting defiant glares that don't look so defiant when coupled with the eyebags under their eyes.

 

Ichihoshi raises his hand, and Coach shoots him a wilting glare at the same moment Nosaka tries to shove the offending hand down, "more than three hours?" Coach asks, voice dripping with scepticism.

 

"Four hours seventeen minutes!" Ichihoshi bites back, head held high in defiance as his eyes gleam with pride.

 

"...a new record, but still. Not good." Coach grumbles, and Asuto is suddenly aware he's missed something important, and turns to everyone with a confused look, who just sheepishly shrug in response.

 

"Alright! Everyone who actually slept, you follow Anna and Ootani to the pitch for some warmups. _Everyone else,_ you're taking a fifteen minute powernap - no ifs, no buts, no _nothing."_ Coach orders, arms crossed and drawing upon all his life experience to create an aura of authority. Given how it's Coach, it doesn't really achieve much, but people still break away to do what they're told.

 

 _"Ichihoshi what are you doing?"_ Sekiya demands with a curt glare, and Ichihoshi yelps in surprise and also very probably fear.

 

"Well, uh, I _did_ sleep last night! A full four hours seventeen minutes! Which is a full seventeen times more than what you're asking them, so uh-" He weakly tries, arms up in a placating gesture as he slowly backs away towards the pitch. Taking the following disbelieving silence as whatever the fuck he wants it to be, Ichihoshi rushes out a quick, 'coolthanksbye' before powerwalking out the door, chased by Anna as the rest of the team collectively lose their shit.

 

"Well, that's that I guess," Coach sighs, suddenly aging ten years. He then turns to look at Asuto with something that isn't completely cruel but isn't completely sunshine and rainbows either. Something soft an understanding.

 

"Asuto, do you mind if me and Sekiya have a chat with you? You're not in trouble I promise." Coach asks, walking over to Asuto and putting a comforting hand on his shoulder, and Asuto instinctively leans into the touch despite his dread.

 

Coach said he's not in trouble, but 'you're not in trouble' is also the number one thing adults say when they're calling children over for a quick chat, so Asuto is still a little worried. And with the worry, that insidious voice in his head start crawling its way back to Asuto's mind, whispering cruel words about how he _is_ in trouble, about how they're kicking him off the team for being so _useless-_

 

Asuto, not really feeling up to words, nods in agreement, and he gets led away by Coach into his office at just the same moment Nishikage and Sekiya bodily carry Ichihoshi up to the dorms.

 

Asuto _really_ needs to check what that's all about.

 

* * *

 

When Asuto arrives in Coach's office and gets himself comfortable in one of the chairs opposite Coach's desk, it takes a full five minutes for a slightly disheveled Sekiya to arrive, smoothing his sports jacket over.

 

"Sorry about that." is all Sekiya offers as he seats himself into a next to Asuto, the arrangement forming this weird triangle of chairs.

 

Coach simply nods in understanding, a whole conversation passing between the two adults as Asuto bounces his legs to work off the excess energy in his system. Sekiya turns to face Asuto, face smoothed over in concern and something non-judgemental as he meets the other's eyes.

 

"Hey Asuto, how you doing?" Sekiya prods, calm but with a definite undercurrent of professionalism.

 

"Uh, fine I guess? A little tired." Asuto answers honestly (if _greatly_ oversimplifying matters), scratching his cheek in nerves. The answer only makes Sekiya nod, eyes steeling a little.

 

"That's- that's great, actually, from what I've been told. Which, uh, brings us to why we're here." Sekiya replies, crossing his legs and arms in a way that, somehow, doesn't give off defensive or closed off airs. It's at that moment that it strikes Asuto that Sekiya is probably used to keeping his reactions in check given his plethora of professions, but even still Sekiya's jaw is clenched in obvious rage - whether it's _at_ Asuto or _for_ Asuto has yet to be seen, but Asuto doesn't want to risk asking.

 

"Don't worry, you're not getting kicked off the team or anything drastic like that," Coach reassures, and the words make Asuto relax ever-so-slightly, "we just want to…ask you some things first." he adds, and he quickly scrambles to explain himself at the despair that creeps across Asuto's face at the notion of _more questions._

 

"Nothing like the police interview! We just want to know if you want to be open to your teammates about what happened?" he clarifies, and the question throws Asuto completely for a loop, because really, _what an obvious answer?_

 

Of course he should explain what happened to his team, _they're his team_. He can't just keep secrets like them, especially not anything as big as this! Keeping secrets about what was actually happening about his father is what caused this in the first place, and while the mere idea of reopening fresh, barely-healed wounds for the sake of his team knowing just how much of a failure he is makes in his lungs turn solid and his blood turn to ice, it's probably not _fair_ to them either. He's been gone for a week and the media won't shut up about it, his team - his _friends_ \- deserve much more than barely truthful 'facts' and grossly exaggerated details the media is definitely spewing. They probably deserve more than Asuto, to be perfectly honest.

 

His thoughts must show on his face, because Sekiya pipes up, "While we can understand if you want to be open and upfront about everything to your teammates, there's the matter of your own wellbeing - you've gone through something horrifically traumatic, and making your mental state worse for the sake of sating your friend's curiosity is going to cause more harm than good. Especially if they don't react how you anticipated them to."

 

Oh. That makes sense. Now that Sekiya has said it, it actually makes a _lot_ of sense. Opening up right now would definitely cause another crying fit, and Asuto's already ashamed of how many he's had just today. Plus, given the current state of his team, he's not entirely sure they wouldn't react badly to the details. Actually, they'd probably drop Asuto like he was a hot sack of potatoes once they found out just how damaged he was. Or just wrack up extensive murder charges. Either seems likely, and the latter has Asuto wincing.

 

"But they still deserve to know." he whispers, aimlessly swinging his legs back and forth and looking down at the ground as if it holds the answers to all of his life's current problems.

 

"Not if it doesn't involve them." Coach replies.

 

"But it does! They're my team! They need to know at some point!" Asuto rebukes, voice on the cusp of a yell. The sudden burst of defiance leaves him as quickly as it came, and he slumps sadly in his chair with a mumbled apology.

 

"While they probably do need to know at some point to avoid any unfortunate upsets, it's your mental and emotional health on the line. You've only been free for less than a day, and these things take time. If you're even a little uncomfortable at the idea of telling them now, then you shouldn't put yourself through that, teammates or not. They're your friends, they'll wait as long as you need them too - besides, anyone who doesn't isn't worth your time of day." Sekiya interjects, voice carefully calm and soothing as he shoots down all of Asuto's worries and fears with a rationality that Asuto is starting to hate.

 

"We were planning on keeping it on a strictly need-to-know basis, but we wanted to ask you first just in case." Coach adds, right hand raised in that suitably Coach-like explanatory gesture.

 

"...fine, but they deserve to know at one point." Asuto relents after a stretch of silence, and the two men in the room nod in understanding at his decision.

 

"Take your time, although just to cover all bases, I want to know what you want us to do if, uh, how do I phrase this, someone _does something_ to set you off?" Sekiya asks, wincing slightly at the verbal acrobatics he has to do to phrase the question in a not-panic-inducing way.

 

Oh, Asuto never thought about that. He doesn't know what anyone could do that could 'set him off,' but he figures that if the roles were reversed, he'd at least want some sort of explanation. "You can tell them as much as you need to? I'm not really sure, but if I was them I'd at least want to know what I did wrong." he answers with a shrug, and Sekiya nods as he stores that answer away somewhere in his weirdly-competent brain.

 

"We'd also like to talk about the possibility of getting you some professional help-"

 

_"No."_

 

It's a single word, but the force and coldness behind it stops Sekiya in his tracks and makes Coach raise his eyebrows. Asuto doesn't _need_ help, because nothing bad enough to deserve it happened. If Ichihoshi could be manipulated and used after the lowest moment of his life to live Orion's lie and still turn out no worse for wear, then Asuto can muscle through this too. They'll win the FFI, they'll defeat Orion, and then Asuto and the rest of InaJapan can hop on a plane back to Japan and Asuto can return to Inakunijima and his old team and be done with Russia and act like nothing happened, like nothing changed. What happened isn't even that bad- Asuto's probably massively overexaggerating it. A kid from a rural island with no form of misfortune other than a sickly and ultimately deceased mother has no idea how to conceptualise something like this, no frame of reference. Even though he can't stand the mere mention of Orion or the thought of being alone and probably a million other stupid things Asuto hasn't discovered he can't stomach yet, it's really nothing at all.

 

At the end of the day, Asuto's just being weak.

 

Besides, Orion will literally murder him if he opens up to anyone about what happened, and Asuto would never put it past them to have all the mental health professionals in their pocket. He can't tell anyone, therefore, he'll just _not need to._ He'll fix whatever is wrong with him as and when he discovers it, and he won't get listen to a single word of Orion-owned 'professional advice' in the process.

 

(Deep, deep down, a voice that Asuto refuses to listen to refutes with logic. With the fact that Asuto _knows_ how mental health works, or at least has a cursory knowledge of it to understand that it's just not that simple. That professionals of any kind exist because the problem is too great and too complex for the average person to solve themselves. He slaps a hand over that voice's mouth to shut it up and shoves it even deeper down than wherever it was before, and continues on with life.)

 

"Just think about it, okay?" Coach offers and Asuto nods, because he's already thought about it, and came to the conclusion that it's pointless.

 

His mood - while not necessarily happy beforehand but was definitely not _bad_ \- is sour now, like milk left out for too long to curdle. He hopes the slouch of his shoulders and the darkened look of his eyes isn't too obvious as they all get up and walk together to the training pitch.

 

* * *

 

The current training exercise is fun! Or at least, it _looks_ fun - Asuto isn't actually allowed to take part, for obvious reasons.

 

When Asuto had arrived at the pitch, the team was currently in the midst of their individual warmups, scattered about the pitch, heck, even Gouenji was taking part, albeit doing his physiotherapy in lieu of actual practice for their next match. Everyone had collectively perked up when they saw Asuto, but one quick glare from Anna was enough to stop any plans of crowding around him from dying on the spot. Safe in the knowledge he won't get swamped again, and not sure what to actually do Asuto had made his way to the bench, where he's currently sitting, water bottle in hand. Coach had objected to Asuto watching the match, walking over to him to not-so-subtly suggest he shouldn't observe this match for his own sake, giving a pointed look. Asuto had merely insisted he was _fine, actually, thank you very much, Coach,_ and Coach had eventually relented.

 

Soon after the warmups had ended, the group who had been ordered to powernap stumbled into the land of the living, sleepily rubbing their eyes and yawning. Ichihoshi in particular almost falling over, giving monosyllabic replies to any words directed his way until he wakes himself up. Which involved slapping his face a few times doing some quick stretches, but whatever wakes him up, Asuto supposes.

 

The team gathered on the pitch in full, Coach orders the new arrivals to begin their warmups while the rest doing some quick team exercises in small groups. Asuto simply observes, feeling content at his team's efforts and achievements, even if the latter is stained with echoes of shocks across skin. Occasionally someone makes eye contact with him and gives him a wave, and Asuto gives them a close approximation of a smile, the uptilt of his lips soured by the conversation from earlier. He's still a little confused about Aphrodi on the team, considering he wasn't on the team the last time Asuto was also on the team, and he makes a mental note to formally approach Aphrodi for an introduction and welcome to the team. Hopefully, the four goals Aphrodi scored last match and the pain that followed them won't get in the way.

 

It’s when everyone is actually on the same page when things get interesting. It’s some sort of mock match in small groups, with a bunch of groups alternating between their plays against other groups, like a mini tournament. Asuto keeps watching, unconsciously gripping his water bottle harder when his eyes glance over to the goalposts, breath catching whenever whoever has the ball approaches the goal. Deep breathes. In, out, in again and then out again. This is fine - so what if Asuto got electrocuted whenever anyone scores? He won’t anymore, and that’s what matters. He’ll get over this, there’s nothing really wrong, he can sort this out on his own. It’s what he tells himself to calm down, even as his stomach somersaults at the mere sight of people playing as they should.

 

Maybe, just maybe, if Asuto wants to consider it, there’s a possibility that he’s just a little bit bitter. At Orion for what they did, or at his teammates for being able to continue on as normal, or even at himself, he doesn’t really know.

 

His moping - because yes, that’s basically what it is - is interrupted when Ichihoshi _falls asleep while standing_ and thus doesn’t see the ball flying directly towards his face, a particularly powerful kick by Nosaka that was supposed to be an easily dodged warning to get Ichihoshi out the way, if it weren’t for _Ichihoshi being asleep_. There’s a startled cry of ‘Nosaka!’ from Nishikage and a full body cringe from Nosaka just before the ball connects with Ichihoshi’s face, and the disoriented yelp Ichihoshi makes as he gets slammed in the face and falls to the ground has Asuto giggling before he can stop himself. Ichihoshi seemingly just stares at the sky, rapidly losing the will to live as his concerned teammates - and a ‘disappointed but not surprised’ Sekiya - crowd around him. At least it woke him up.

 

After that whole accident, Ichihoshi gets sent to the bench to observe just like Asuto, obviously too tired to continue. He relents but doesn’t seem happy with it, because he’s comically pouting and muttering about ‘fucking goddamn bullshit TRAJECTORY and _PHYSICS’_ under his breath as he walks to the bench. He sits right next to Asuto, legs crossed as he rubs his hand over where the ball connected.

 

“I’m awake enough.” Ichihoshi argues the second he sits down.

 

“...You look like a raccoon?” Asuto tentatively suggests after a beat of silence, mentally bracing himself for Ichihoshi-style obliteration. Because Ichihoshi _does_ look awful, his hair is disheveled, his skin is a little pale and the eye bags under his eyes are glaringly obvious. Really, he looks like someone dared him to stay up for a week straight and he accepted, like an _idiot._ Ichihoshi doesn’t give a verbal reaction, instead just gaping at Asuto in betrayal before giving up on the argument and falling into silence.

 

They stay in an awkward silence for a while, passively observing the training exercise, and soon Asuto’s eyelids become heavy, and exhaustion steals what strength he had to keep himself upright and he slumps onto Ichihoshi, cheek placed firmly on the other’s shoulder. Ichihoshi, despite saying he wasn’t tired, had started drifting off where he’s sat, head lolling forwards. He jolts when Asuto slumps against him, before closing his eyes and starting to doze off again. Asuto thinks he makes out a ‘OH MY GOD THEY’RE SLE-’ from Endou before there’s the sound of a hand slapping over a mouth and a seethed ‘SHUT IT’ from Kazemaru, but it’s background noise in the face of Asuto’s sleepy haze and the physical contact from Ichihoshi.

 

It feels nice, the feeling of his cheek against Ichihoshi’s shoulder. The angle his cheek is at means he’s pressing against the bony part of Ichihoshi’s shoulder, and it feels simultaneously too uncomfortably sharp and like a nice anchor to reality. Somehow the physical contact is soothing despite how little Asuto’s gotten over the past week, the forced starvation of human contact making all the nerves in Asuto’s body more hyperaware of any sensory touch than he’s ever been, starved of touch like how a man in the desert is starved of water. The pressure of Ichihoshi’s shoulder is the only thing his mind and body can focus on, a deep and grounding feeling that sends waves of contentedness cascading down his body. It calms him just enough for the tension to bleed from his shoulders and allow him to properly start to drift off. Probably for the best, given how his sleep when in Orion’s captivity was… _shaky,_ at best. The lack of any timekeeping and the unpredictable timing of the electrocutions wreaking havoc on Asuto’s sleep cycle. After the fifth time he was caught off guard and electrocuted on the cusp of sleep, Asuto had forsaken sleep in favour of being on guard. He’s drifting off fully now, body starting to feel heavy and slack as his consciousness fades away, his mind conjuring up the first random images of a dream and he fully gives into the allure of sleep.

 

Which is the exact moment someone yells ‘Goal!’ and Asuto violently snaps back to reality because it doesn’t sound like the announcer from the matches but someone’s just scored a goal and-

 

_He wakes up to the sound of someone yelling ‘Goal!’ and beeping right by his ear, ripped from his dream of the Inakunijima coast, and it makes him fall off the uncomfortable bed in alarm, trying to get his bearings. The TV shows the Australia match and the Austraila team just scored their first goal, and through the panicked and half-asleep haze Asuto remembers exactly where he is and he realises what exactly is about to happen a split second before the shock comes, agony lacing his veins-_

 

The flashback leaves as soon as it came, and Asuto returns to reality lying sprawled on the ground on his side, eyes wide and gasping as everyone looks at him. Including Ichihoshi, who must’ve woken up when Asuto had fallen off the bench, wide-eyed and skin pale as he stares at Asuto, and it takes a second for Asuto to realise that Ichihoshi is deliberately suppressing his reaction, the echo of some horrifying realisation in the latter’s eyes. Asuto blinks rapidly, licking his dry lips as he scrambles his disorientated mind to find words.

 

“Uh,” he starts, the word sounding frail as it passes over his mouth, “The noise woke me up?” he offers, sheepishly shrugging as he spares quick glances to everyone in his line of sight, unconsciously digging his nails into his left arm.

 

His answer makes everyone snap their heads, collectively oozing murderous intent over to Endou, whose hands are still cupped around his mouth from when he was cheering. Ah, so Endou was the one who yelled then. Endou at least looks incredibly ashamed and apologetic for accidentally waking Asuto - and by extension Ichihoshi - up, but the look on his face is also crossed with the fear that comes with realising you’re probably about to be murdered by your entire team, risking glances to Kazemaru, who looks like he’s going to end Endou’s entire bloodline right there on the spot. It doesn’t take long for the stunned silence to be broken, with everyone yelling at Endou for waking Asuto up. Asuto swears he can make out Haizaki screaming ‘ENDOU YOU FUCKER-’ in the cacophony of noise, and just quietly gets up and dusts himself off as chaos reigns on the pitch, meeting Ichihoshi’s shaken look with his own. Ichihoshi doesn’t make eye-contact with him, instead snapping his gaze to Endou’s predicament.

 

“Oh my god they’re gonna Mitsuru him, they’re gonna just murder him like that.” Ichihoshi blurts out in his half asleep haze and immediately regrets it, eyes wide and face red in embarrassment. The comment makes Asuto start laughing again - unfortunately right as he was taking a swig of water from his water bottle. The water falls down onto his jersey as he giggles to himself like an idiot.

 

Honestly, Asuto just overreacted at someone yelling ‘goal,’ but seeing the team lose their minds in protection of Asuto is still comforting.

 

* * *

 

It’s a little after training has finished, and everyone has taken off to various haunts in the campground to slump in various states of exhaustion. Asuto is sitting in the middle portion of the couch in the centre of the common room, flanked by Mansaku and Kirina, the latter of whom is flanked by Haizaki. Ichihoshi, much to the other’s confusion, isn’t with them, having disappeared off somewhere else. Haizaki mutters something that can roughly be paraphrased as ‘good fucking riddance he better be in a goddamn coma’ and it makes Asuto nudge Mansaku’s shoulder and ask about it.

 

“Ichihoshi pulled like, seventeen all nighters in a row, he’s a little tired.” Mansaku explains with a shrug.

 

“There’s only seven nights in a week dumbass, but aight.” Haizaki snarks back.

 

“Listen here you bear-stanning emo child-”

 

_“I am not a child you hat-wearing, fish-kinning twunk-”_

 

_“EXCUSE ME-”_

 

“Okay! Maybe we need to chill!” Kirina suddenly interjects, armed with a slightly panicked wild smile that’s clearly trying to diffuse the situation, his hands in the air in a placating gesture.

 

“There is no chill in the capitalist hellscape that we find ourselves in.” Asuto huffs with the casualness one used when commenting on the weather, his own eyes sliding closed and head falling back into the couch cushion.

 

There’s a brief second of stunned silence where everyone looks at Asuto in bewilderment, before Haizaki bursts into laughter as Kirina and Mansaku continue to stare at him in slight confusion. The laughter continues on even as Asuto just mumbles a ‘I am right though.’ Eventually the laughter dies down and the good mood turns into something more calm and subdued, and Kirina and Mansaku share a look before the former nudges Asuto’s shoulder.

 

“Hey listen, I know this is probably a bad time and all but this is the first time we’ve actually had the chance to just chill today and, uh, welcome back _.”_ Kirina whispers, voice cracking at the last words as he tries his best to not let his tears fall. 

 

From the corner of his eye Asuto can see Haizaki start to squirm in awkward discomfort, and Asuto decides to put him out of his misery and turns to him, “Haizaki, do you mind going to my room and getting my long sleeved jacket? It’ll be in my suitcase under my bed and it’s the only one I packed.” Asuto asks, and Haizaki raises a brow at the odd request, seeing through the thinly veiled attempt to get him out of the room while the others talk. Nevertheless, Haizaki is respectful to not voice his thoughts and obliges, getting up and out of the room.

 

As soon as Haizaki leaves Kirina’s composure doesn’t last long - or even at all - because the tears gathered in his eyes spill over and he violently purses his lips closed in a feeble attempt to dampen the hiccups forming at his throat. Eventually he just gives up on holding it all in, body shaking with the force of his crying as he envelops Asuto in a fierce, protective hug, clinging onto Asuto as if he’s scared the other will disappear forever if he even thinks of loosening his death grip. Beside Asuto, Mansaku gives into his own urge to cry and joins the impromptu group hug, using his height to rest his head on top of Asuto’s as he sniffles.

 

“It’s good to see you again.” he sniffles, squeezing Asuto harder.

 

“We- we thought you were _dead,”_ Kirina confesses, muffled in the layers of Asuto’s jacket and interrupted by his own hiccups, “Ichihoshi said that you were most likely killed, and we all listened to him because of his experience. _”_ Kirina wails. The information throws Asuto for a loop at first, knowing that his team had thought Orion had murdered him. A small, dark, bitter piece of him wishes they _did,_ if only out of mercy. Asuto immediately regrets the thought, ashamed he even considered it, and redirects his attention elsewhere.

 

“He’s just, really upset. He took the whole thing the hardest and blames himself for it, and now the media is on him.” Mansaku tacks on, prompting a confused look from Asuto.

 

“Why is Ichihoshi blaming himself? It’s my fault, I’m the one who fell for the trap.” Asuto argues. says, as casual as can be.

 

“Don’t say that! You wanted to meet your dad and they used that against you!” Kirina yells back, snapping his tear-stained face to stare directly at Asuto, willing him to understand.

 

"And? I should've known better." Asuto retorts, digging his proverbial heels into the ground, stubborn to the end. 

 

"But how? They knew what they were doing and they knew how to do it so that you'd fall for it! It's not your fault for falling into a trap specifically designed for you." Kirina bounces back just as stubbornly, burning with intensity. 

 

“I guess.” Asuto mumbles, agreeing just for the sake of agreeing - just to get Kirina to stop. Even in his stubbornness Asuto knows that Kirina is _right_ , that there really was nothing he could've done against a trap made just for him, but the constant what ifs and small details that he should've noticed keep repeating themselves in his mind like a mantra, one that Asuto finds hard to silence with logicm

 

If his good mood was still somehow intact, it definitely isn't now that Asuto’s dad has been brought up. Strangely, Asuto never really considered the world-shattering revelation of his dad being _Shinjou Takuma_ as much as he probably could or should have, too wrapped up in trying to survive what Orion was doing to him. He dwelled on it for sure, tied himself in circles by overthinking it again and again, trying to rationalise everything he knew about Shinjou and compare it against the idealised concept Asuto had created in his mind. He did all of that constantly, but not as much as a whole week of mostly-uninterrupted solitude would allow. It’s not like he agonised over his own father at every moment he wasn’t being tortured, right? Surely he thought about other things? InaJapan? _Mom?_ Asuto can’t even be sure, the memories and experiences of the past week blurring together into a vague haze even though _it just happened._ His memory is usually much better than this, so why is it that when he need his memories more than ever, they’re sparse, vague things? _Why can he only remember the worst moments?_

 

He does vividly remember crying about his dad in the first couple of hours though. He remembers his dad’s face as he was being dragged off into a concrete box for a week, and he remembers sobbing and wailing over his dad’s betrayal for hours, childishly begging for the man he had just learnt was his father to come save him, even though that same man was the one who brought him here. He remembers all of that in horrifying detail, and wishes more than anything that he could just erase the details from his mind.

 

It’s a “-to?” and a hand waved in front of his face that breaks him from his reverie, and he snaps back to reality to meet Mansaku’s concerned face. Ah, he must have gotten lost in thought then. 

“You okay? You had us worried for a second there.” Mansaku asks.

 

“What do you think of my dad?” Asuto blurts out in lieu of a direct answer, because he couldn’t stop his mouth from saying what his mind was thinking and he might as well commit. Kirina and Mansaku visibly pale, wide eyes meeting eachother as they shift on the couch in visible discomfort.

 

It’s Mansaku - as usual - who bites the bullet. “He’s a fucking bitch. He kidnapped you and did who knows what to how many people, if I ever see him I _will_ kill him.” he seethes, rage clouding his features. Contrary to what the involuntary flinch would say, Asuto knows that Mansaku isn’t mad _at_ him but rather _for_ him.

 

“But you don’t know that? Don’t know if he did I mean.” Asuto tentatively replies, because Mansaku really doesn’t have any way of knowing who Asuto’s dad is or that he was involved at all. From Mansaku’s perspective, it could’ve been a complete lie to fool Asuto.

 

“Well he obviously did if you’re asking about it.” Mansaku snaps back, jaw clenched in poorly suppressed rage, glaring right at Asuto. 

 

“...Yeah.” Asuto confirms, subdued and breaking out of the now loose group hug to bring his knees up to his chest. “Met him too, if only for a while,” he laughs, something dead and joyless, eyes unfocusing. Even though he’s _fine_ , even though he _doesn’t need help_ , he’s till struck by the sudden urge to overshare. “Y’know what’s worse? I really should’ve known better. Back on the cruise ship I bumped into someone, and then the next day the same person _hunted me down_ to talk to me when I was on the Sky Tree, said he was ‘really interested in my plays’ and had offered to help find my dad. A-and I should have known it was a bad idea, because it was _Shinjou Takuma!_ The second-in-command of Orion went out of his way to find me and then offered to help look for my dad, and I didn’t think anything of it! Shady man from the shady organisation we’re fighting seeks me out to help me in a really shady way and I somehow miss all the red flags!

 

“And then if that wasn’t enough, when Shinjou texts me saying he’s found my dad and wants to rendezvous somewhere, I _still_ somehow don’t think anything of it. I only start thinking that _something_ might be up when the _chairman of the Orion Foundation_ walks in and basically slaps me in the face with the fact that Shinjou is my dad. After all this time thinking of my dad and wondering what he’s like, I find out that my dad is the _same shady man_ , and that he’s led me into a trap.” Asuto vents, voice raw and desperate as he forces the words out into the air. He doesn’t even realise there are tears running down his cheeks until they start splashing onto the fabric of his trousers below him.

 

Now that he’s gotten the horrible truth of his dad out of the air - if only just to two people - he deflates, the fight leaving his body. The only sound in the room is Asuto’s gasping, and Mansaku and Kirina are ashen faced beside him at the knowledge that Shinjou had apparently wormed his way into his son’s life long before the kidnapping, as if to scout him out. It explains how Orion managed to bug his phone now that Asuto thinks about it, and it just proves all of Asuto’s self-loathing to be founded.

 

“I miss my mom.” Asuto chokes out, drawing upon some long-passed and deeply buried wound in his heart and picking at it until it starts bleeding anew, leaving Asuto bleeding out on the floor. Mansaku and Kirina wrap their arms around him again, squeezing him gently, and they stay like that for a while, saying nothing. 

 

It’s in that calmness that Asuto glances across the room, and sees the slight bandaging on Kirina’s arms that isn’t hidden by his undershirt, and it stirs up the memory of the America match in Asuto’s brain.

 

“Oh Kirina, sorry I didn’t ask before but are you okay? It looked like you got really hurt with those landmines.” Asuto asks, turning his head to face the boy in question, who in turn lifts his head up before remembering what Asuto’s talking about.

 

“Oh, that! Yeah I’m fine, just a few bruises and- wait, _wait,_ ” Kirina starts to answer before he suddenly stops, having realised something, "you saw our match against America?” he asks with a raise of his eyebrow, and Asuto immediately realises his mistake.

 

“Uh, yeah?” he offers feebly, wracking his brain for an answer he can give his friends that they’ll believe.

 

“How?” Kirina asks incredulously. Which, uh, _fair?_  

 

“Uh,” is the eloquent start to Asuto’s explanation, “They- Orion wanted me to see it? I don’t know why though.” He lies - or rather, _partially lies._ It’s true that Orion wanted him to see the match, but he knows exactly why, and he doesn’t feel comfortable telling them _that_ yet.

 

There’s a pause, and then a small, subdued “Asuto, what did they do to you?” from Mansaku, and Asuto doesn’t even need to see the other’s face to know it’s got worry and fear written on it as clear as day.

 

“Nothing!” Is the panicked response from Asuto, the blatant lie out of his mouth before he’s even aware of it, and quickly switches to damage control when he sees Mansaku’s eyebrows jump to his hairline, “Well- obviously not ‘nothing’ but uh - can we please not talk about it?” Asuto begs Mansaku, forcing himself to meet Mansaku’s eyes dead on to try and convey even a fraction of his discomfort.

 

“...alright then.” Mansaku acquiesces, not happy with letting the subject drop but still doing it out of respect, although he does shoot a ‘we’re talking about this at some point’ look at Asuto. Nobody can find an alternative topic to talk about, so they just sit there in an awkward but companionable silence. 

 

It’s a knock on the door and a ‘y’all done with the crying?’ that changes the subject for them, as Haizaki steps into the room without even waiting for a response. He’s holding the jacket Asuto had sent him to fetch in his left hand, a thin garment made of light blue denim, and the second his eyes snap to Asuto he chucks the jacket in his direction, Asuto catches the garment with slight, numb butterfingers and places it on his lap for the time being. He may be itching to get out of the uniform jersey - which is still slightly wet from when he spilled that water on himself - and into something more comfortable, but he’s too self-conscious to do it right now, where three pairs of eyes will be made privy to his shames and failures.

 

“Thanks.” He instead, well, _thanks_ Haizaki, injecting his usual cheer into it. 

 

“No problem, it’s just a jacket,” Haizaki grumbles back, folding his arms in his default, vaguely-pissed-off stance. “Was a bitch to find though. Seriously, how many short sleeves do you need? I swear you only wear short sleeves when you can.” He complains, although the complaint is less directed at Asuto and more just directed at the offending garments in question.

 

“Haizaki has a point. I’ve seen you willingly wear long sleeves like, twelve times, and we’ve known eachother since we were babies.” Mansaku points out, tone jovial and mock-critical, obviously just kidding around with his friend. His friend, who is currently in the midst of sweating because while his friends mean well, he’d rather pull out his own teeth with an old pair of chopsticks than explain his reasons.

 

“I’m just cold is all.” Asuto lies, hoping it’s reasonable enough to get his friends off his back and onto a different subject. If Mansaku sees the distress that Asuto is trying to clamp down on he doesn’t point it out, instead taking off his own jersey to drape it over Asuto with a joking ‘then you should have just said so, dumbass’ that makes Asuto smile. Kirina and Haizaki follow suit and offer up their own jerseys, effectively burying Asuto under a pile of Inazuma Japan jerseys and a blue denim jacket, the sight of which must look absolutely ridiculous, because Kirina can’t stop snorting and taking photos of a mildly-bewildered Asuto under a pile of improvised-blankets. Oh yeah, Asuto needs to talk to Coach about getting a new phone. That phone was really nice too, sucks that Orion bugged it.

 

It’s at that moment Nosaka and Nishikage to enter the room, scanning the immediate area for someone. They must not find who they’re looking for, and Nosaka turns to look at Asuto, who’s still cocooned in jerseys.

 

“I- y’know what, I’m not gonna question the jerseys,” Nosaka says, pointedly ignoring Asuto’s quiet ‘I was cold’ and instead getting to his point, “Have any of you seen Ichihoshi?”

 

“Isn’t he not with you two? We haven’t seen him since practice.” Mansaku answers with a shrug, gaining agreements from Kirina and Asuto.

 

“I saw him going to his room just now, so check there.” Haizaki says, gaining a stunned look from Nishikage and an eyebrow raise from Nosaka.

 

“Is he finally going to sleep? Is your son doing what you’re telling him?” Kirina asks, directing the second question at Nosaka and Nishikage, who seem to be considering the possibility for a moment. 

 

“Probably not.” Nishikage sighs, face darkening at the mere concept that Ichihoshi still has the audacity to defy them.

 

“Thank you for the information guys. Nishikage, let’s go.” Nosaka says, turning around to exit the room, presumably to obliterate Ichihoshi for still being awake, Nishikage hot on Nosaka’s heels, leaving a dumbfounded Asuto behind them.

 

“Wait, when did those two become Ichihoshi’s dads?” Asuto asks, feeling another piece of the puzzle slot into place at the same time another one falls out.

 

“Like a week ago.” Kirina says.

 

“Ah,” Is Asuto’s incredibly intelligent response, still dumbfounded. “Is there anything else I missed?”

 

“Haizaki punched Ichihoshi and everyone back home is distraught about the kidnapping- speaking of! I don’t think our teammates back home know you’re back yet given how none of us have 72 missed calls from Michinari. Then again I haven't really been online in the past week.” Mansaku explains, deliberately glossing over the ‘Haizaki punched Ichihoshi’ in favour of everyone back home. Asuto just snaps his head to Haizaki, who responds with an unashamed half-shrug.

 

“Oh yeah, good point. I’m surprised they don’t know by now even with the language issue, social media would have picked up on it by now.” Kirina ponders, getting his phone out to check Twitter for any news pertaining to Asuto.

 

“Was my disappearance that much of a big deal?” Asuto asks, the horde of reporters at the hospital earlier making much more sense now. 

 

 _“Yes?_ Your disappearance and Ichihoshi has been the only thing anyone’s talking about. _”_ Haizaki answers, incredulous and eyebrows raised up into the stratosphere, but Asuto ignores it in favour of a part of Haizaki’s answer that confuses Asuto further.

 

“Why is Ichihoshi in the news? Did he do something?” Asuto asks, ignorant of the reason why Ichihoshi is now in the media cycle when the whole thing is about Asuto anyway. At the question, Haizaki’s face blanks out in realisation as Kirina and Mansaku turn to glare at Haizaki.

 

“Oh well _done, genius._ ” Mansaku snarks at Haizaki.

 

“It’s nothing! It’s just because of the baseball bat assault from last night, but you know how terrible the media is. Incidentally, please don’t check out the coverage on your disappearance because it’s not pretty.” Kirina explains, answering Asuto’s question - if a little suspiciously, given the obvious panic. It gets even more suspicious when Mansaku and Haizaki frantically nod their heads in agreement, and Asuto knows for a fact that something is up, and it somehow has to do with Ichihoshi. Not that Asuto can just _ask_ him though, given everything, so he just keeps quiet and makes a mental note to worry about it later.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also!! Because I've seen people wondering about the actual canon-divergence part and where it relates to the actual canon bits (specifically in regards to Malik and Lus and stuff):
> 
> -Because 'Inamori Masato' never happened and Asuto never came into contact with Malik, Malik isn't going to take as much of a role as he did in canon. He'll still be there because I'm a sap who loves my short ginger son but like, not as much as he did in canon.
> 
> -In the same vein, Lus also isn't going to be appearing as much as in canon (if he does at all), and as much as I love the InaBros theory I'm not going for that in this fic. Here, Orion never tried to brainwash Asuto, so Shinjou had no reason to use Lus as a body double for Asuto
> 
> -In regards to Irina and the wild turn the series took at the end: no. I got into this fic and started it all the way back in the Spain match where we had just been introduced to Bernard, and Bernard's character in this fic has changed so much from him in canon. Canon Bernard was a bastard being horrifically abused by his mother, EN Bernard is just a straight up psychopath.


	6. Wild Recognises Wild, Like Attracts Like

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Humans are naturally drawn to others of similar past and present, and misery is the ultimate character-builder, the test of the human spirit and condition.
> 
> How fitting then, that Ichihoshi Hikaru finds friendship in the misery that is Orion's heavy-handed dealings of the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo heads up you're gonna need to know these two things for a very small part of the chapter:
> 
> フロイ　ギリカナン　= 'Furoi Girikanan' = Froy Girikanan, it's just Froy's name transliterated into Japanese katakana
> 
> 'ХИКАРУ' = 'HIKARU' translated into Russian Cyrillic
> 
> Yes i went through all that effort for a really small and really dumb joke, fite me

The ceiling plaster is actually pretty ugly, Hikaru decides after god-knows how long staring at it, lying on his bed.

 

He had excused himself and slinked off to his room after practice, and is now lying flat against his bed and staring at the ceiling as his mind works itself in circles. You’d think your teammate returning after a week of being held hostage by the same organisation that ruined your life would be a cause for celebration, but apparently not and here Hikaru is, still a mess up in his room and  _ not glued to Asuto, as he should be.  _ After a whole week of tearing himself apart over Asuto’s kidnapping, after a whole week of all nighters and breakdowns and caustic arguments with the team, it all concludes with Hikaru cooped up in his room like a coward?  _ Pathetic. _

 

He knows that he needs to talk to Asuto about Orion, about everything, especially given how Asuto’s kidnapping was probably Hikaru’s fault. It’s the least he could do, given he ruined Asuto’s life by being involved with it in the first place. If Hikaru hadn’t been sent to InaJapan to destroy it from the inside, then Asuto wouldn’t have ever helped rescue Hikaru from both himself and Orion, and Orion wouldn’t have snatched Asuto off the streets in retaliation for Hikaru’s defection. And even in the highly unlikely possibility Hikaru  _ wasn’t  _ the reason for the kidnapping, then Hikaru is still at fault for not noticing something sooner and stopping Asuto from leaving through that goddamn door. The logic is all there and it all makes  _ sense _ , and he knows that he should approach Asuto, if not as an apologiser then at least as a fellow victim of Orion’s suffering. Asuto is fresh off the press from Orion’s cruelty, and Hikaru is the only one who can make up for his own involvement in it.

 

_ So then why don’t you just  _ **_talk_ ** _ to him, Hikaru?  _ A voice that sounds hauntingly like his brother whispers in his mind.

 

It’s probably  _ because  _ of Hikaru’s involvement with Asuto’s kidnapping, he thinks. The more Hikaru dwells on it the more and more he convinces himself that Asuto feels the exact same way about Hikaru’s involvement, which makes the tight feeling in Hikaru’s throat worse. If Asuto also agrees that Hikaru is at fault, then why would he appreciate the source of all his misery up in his face to talk to him? Hikaru knows for a fact that he’d feel the same way if the roles were reversed, and maybe that’s the logic he’s using to justify why he’s taken the coward’s option and decided to avoid the whole thing altogether, because he’s too pathetic to deal with his problems as they come. He couldn’t accept that his brother was dead so he developed his brother’s personality and continued on as Mitsuru, and now he can’t bear to face Asuto so he’s hiding away in his room and over-analysing what he saw at practice earlier.

 

Hikaru isn’t dumb - far from it, in fact. He knows what he saw at practice, and he knows what it means. He’s intimately acquainted with trauma to see it in another person and he saw it in the way Asuto reacted to Endou’s yelling, and it’s making him more and more worried the more he thinks about it.  It’s the same reaction he has to squealing tires and images of car crashes on the news and being in the right side of backseats in cars and anything else that can remind him of his car crash. It’s not a reaction that normal,  _ healthy _ people have to someone yelling the word ‘goal’. Hikaru’s had that same reaction - from the panicked scream to the wide eyes to the sweating - enough times to identify it, which makes seeing it on the normally happy-go-lucky Asuto all the more a gut punch. It’s what had made him retreat to his room in the first place, a quiet room where he can come to terms with the fact that Asuto left the campgrounds right as rain and came back to it with post-traumatic stress disorder. 

 

They’ve both been hurt by Orion, and if what Hikaru saw at practice is any indication, then Asuto is much more hurt than he’s letting on, and Hikaru seems to have been the only one to notice it. Which is why it’s a bit of a shock to hear a knock at the door and see Nosaka walk into the room, flanked by Nishikage who gently closes the door behind him as he enters. Nosaka drags a chair over to where Hikaru is still laying on the bed and sits next to him.

 

“I was going to sleep.” Hikaru lies easily, not wanting to deal with The Concerned NishiNoza Parents™ right now.

 

“No you weren’t, what’s wrong?” Nosaka sees through the lie just as easily, getting straight into why he’s here in the first place. When Hikaru just gives a monosyllabic noise in response, Nosaka changes his approach.

 

“If this is about me smacking you in the head with the ball earlier, just know that I’m sorry.” He jokes, or at least tries to, given how it’s Nosaka. Not getting an actual response from Hikaru for a second time, he just sighs.

 

“This is about Asuto, isn’t it?” Nosaka asks, and it’s answered by a small nod from Hikaru as he gets himself into a sitting position and draws his knees up to his chest.

 

“I need to talk to him about everything, especially since I saw something worrying earlier at practice but- but I can’t! I’m probably the last person he wants to see right now.” Hikaru confesses, burying his head further and further into his chest with each passing second.

 

“I think it’d be a good idea if you talked to him, I think you both need it.” Nosaka encourages, voice something soft and open.

 

“Why?” Hikaru bites out, voice something rough and cold.

 

“Because I imagine he’s blaming himself.” Nosaka states, and it has Hikaru snapping his head up to Nosaka’s in incredulity.

 

“Why? It’s not his fault! It’s mine!” Hikaru yells, the conviction in his voice making Nosaka startle.

 

“Why would it be your fault and not his for getting kidnapped?” Nosaka ventures. He’s obviously trying to guide Hikaru to his own conclusion, and Hikaru is too tired to do anything but take the bait.

 

“Because I’m the ex-Orion Disciple! I’m the one he helped to defect! I’m the one who knows what Orion is capable of and I didn’t do  _ anything!”  _ Hikaru bites out, progressively getting more and more distressed with each passing word until he’s on the verge of tears, voice breaking. 

 

"And I'm the one who let him walk out that door!" Nosaka yells back, calm demeanour giving way to something stressed and strained, uncharacteristic venom bleeding through his voice as the stress of the week catches up to him. The sudden bout is gone just as soon as it came, and Nosaka slumps and pinches the bridge of his nose with a sigh. 

 

It's then, seeing Nosaka overcome with his own personal doubts and fears and failures, that has Hikaru's gut curdle with guilt - after all, Nosaka had been the one to wordlessly comfort Hikaru after the disaster that was the Saudi Arabia match. Hikaru had been swept up in the infectious celebration from the team for just long enough to postpone his breakdown until he was out of the team's prying eye. He broke as he was picking up his water bottle in the now-empty locker room, the revelation that his entire life was a lie fed from his hospital bed catching up to him with all the subtlety and grace of a freight train, fat tears pouring down his cheeks as he mourned the brother he just learnt he lost years ago. Nosaka had found him for whatever reason and had discreetly guided him back to his room, where they had spent who knows how long in silence broken only by Hikaru's wailing. 

 

He remembers it all, but not fondly. It's a memory too associated with pain, too barbed with poisoned thorns to be anything worth remembering, another one for the repression pile. The resurfaced memory is a reminder that while Nosaka may not be an Orion Disciple himself, it doesn't mean that he's completely ignorant to Hikaru's turmoil. Seeing Nosaka in a rare moment of vulnerability is also another stark reminder that Nosaka's been feeling the pressure from the past week too, and Hikaru berates himself for being too wrapped up in private misery to think that maybe Nosaka had some guilt about the whole thing too. 

 

“We’ve told you about the Ares program, right? Think of it like this,” Nishikage pipes up to break the now suffocating silence, walking over to stand by Nosaka’s side, “Say someone said they had some information to beat Orion, and they told you to meet them at a certain place for it. So you go to the rendezvous and discover it was a trap by the Ares program and now you’re their hostage for a week. Who are you going to blame?” 

 

“...myself, I’d blame myself.” Hikaru admits, deflating.

 

“And not me or Nosaka, despite us both being a part of the Ares program?”

 

“...no.”

 

“Exactly, you would blame yourself, not the Ares program, not me or Nosaka - yourself.” Nishikage points out, and Hikaru bristles.

 

“But I didn’t help you two dismantle the Ares program.” 

 

“No, but we’d still blame  _ ourselves,  _ and I’m pretty sure we’d think you would blame us too. _ ”  _ Nosaka interject, finally gathering himself enough for conversation, fixing Hikaru with an intense gaze, “you see what’s happened here, right? Both parties are convinced the other is mad at them and blaming them, when they’re both blaming  _ themselves.  _ All that’s changed is the name of the organisation and the information used to set the trap, everything else is exactly how it’s played out with Asuto.”

 

“But Asuto isn’t  _ us.” _ Hikaru defends, stubbornly defending the losing battle that is his point.

 

“Which is probably why you should go talk to him about it.” Nosaka bounces back.

 

“I can’t just do that right now.” Hikaru mumbles, and he gets a fervent nod from Nosaka.

 

“Oh I agree, you still need to sleep young man, the Russia vs Spain match is later today and we need you for strategy.” Nosaka agrees, pointedly ignoring the indignant squawk from Hikaru as he throws the blanket over him.

 

“Is this because my old teammates are on Perfect Spark? Because Yuri’s a goddamn cunt who runs at the first sign of trouble, Viktor is just there I guess and Froy carries the team. There, your strategy.” Hikaru rants, albeit not in lashing out against Nosaka.

 

“Bit harsh, verbally murdering your teammates like that.” Nosaka mutters, his typical Nosaka Yuuma Smirk™ doing a 180 into a Nosaka Yuuma Frown™.

 

“But it’s true! Yuri is a fucking cunt who gets feeble under pressure and hates fun if someone called Ichihoshi is having it  _ just because I circle gamed him ONE TIME-  _ okay he’s actually pretty decent once you get to know him, I’m just really tired.” Hikaru rants, the tonal whiplash at the end making Nishikage choke on air.

 

“Uh-huh, so maybe you should  _ sleep. _ ” 

 

_ “But Nosaka-san-” _

 

_ “No. Sleep.” _ and with that, Nosaka tucks Hikaru into bed as if he was five, not noticing or just simply not caring about the murderous look Hikaru is shooting him with, fixing it onto the back of Nosaka’s head as he and Nishikage start to retreat from the room.

 

“Goodnight.” Nosaka calls back, giving a random wave as he closes the door behind him. It takes Hikaru approximately two seconds before he’s lunging for his phone, which he does at the same time Nosaka opens the door, disappointed frown on his face.

 

_ “Go to bed.” _ he pleads, before closing the door again. This time, Hikaru waits a full minute despite the retreating footsteps around the fifteen second mark, and while he does try to sleep it's just as much a futile endeavour as every time he's tried in the past week. He's not in the mood to deal with insomnia and nightmares, so instead he reaches for his phone.

 

He’s actually glad past him had the foresight to plug it in this morning, because it had died during shortly after Asuto had been dumped on their doorstep. Powering the screen on to see the lockscreen, he’s greeted by approximately a billion texts from one ‘フロイ・ ギリカナン’ - him and Froy have this inside joke between them, where they'd use the other's native languages when texting between them. The only exception is when using the other's name, where they use their native language for the other - so Hikaru uses フロイ in a cacophony of Russian and Froy uses Хикару in a cacophony of Japanese. Hikaru still doesn't actually know  _ why _ , but he does have a vague memory of something about the Duolingo owl. 

 

Clicking onto the messages, Hikaru sees a wall of text all timestamped for roughly half 2 in the morning and beyond, and his eyes gloss over the messages in order. 

 

**フロイ: ХИКАРУ**

**フロイ: ХИКАРУ OH MY GOD**

**フロイ: ИЧИХОШИ ХИКАРУ DID YOU REALLY**

**フロイ: D I D  Y O U R E A L L Y**

**フロイ: ХИКАРУ I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE YOU ATTACKED IVAN 1 AND 2 I'M CRYING**

**フロイ: YOU USED THE OMAE WA MOU SHINDEIRU BAT?!?! I'M SCREAMING**

**フロイ:** **_image.jpg_ **

**フロイ: MY BROTHER'S FACE AKTJWJGJWK**

**フロイ: HEY WAIT I JUST HEARD SMTH ABT ASUTO**

**フロイ: OH SHIT THEY RETURNED HIM??? THEY JUST DUMPED HIM ON UR DOORSTEP?? WHY THE FUCK WERE YOU EVEN AWAKE ACTUALLY NO DON'T ANSWER THAT I KNOW WHY YOU WEREN'T ASLEEP**

**フロイ: THAT EXPLAINS WHY MY BROTHER WAS TOO SKJFKEKSKSSK I FUCKING HATE THIS**

**フロイ: NOT ASUTO BEING BACK BUT JUST,,, *SHAKES FIST AT ORION***

**(Missed call from: フロイ・ ギリカナン)**

**(Missed call from: フロイ・ ギリカナン)**

**(Missed call from: フロイ・ ギリカナン)**

**フロイ:** **_YAMERO_CAT.JPG_ **

**フロイ: ИЧИХОШИ ХИКАРУ ANSWER UR FUCKING CALLS**

**Хикару: omg so that's their names. Ivan 1 and 2. Ofc they're called IVAN**

**Хикару: also THEY FUCKING DESERVED IT OKAY**

**フロイ:  Х И К А Р У!!!!**

 

It takes approximately 4 more seconds for Hikaru's phone to light up with Froy's caller ID, and he accepts the call and brings the phone up to his ear without thinking. 

 

"HIKARU!!" is what he's greeted by, Froy yelling his name down the other side of the phone line. The volume makes Hikaru flinch back from the offending phone a little before he mumbles a quiet "Hey" that he's pretty sure isn't heard over the sound of Froy's concerned rambling.

 

"are you guys okay? How are you doing? I heard from the news that Asuto returned but I mean of course I'd know that way before the news did because  _ oh hey it's Orion _ and I heard something about an assault charge? I think you're fine though I think the police waved it as self-defence. Anyway!," Froy rambles and rambles and rambles, going off into wild tangents and meaningless circles as his words quicken with urgency and worry. Hikaru can imagine Froy anxiously flailing his arms as he speaks in his mind's eye, and Hikaru finds the chatterbox speech style that Froy is so well known for comforting, something staying the same in defiance of a world turned on its head. 

 

"-ru? Hikaru? Are you there?" Froy's worried question cuts Hikaru out of his thoughts, and he snaps back to the present, "are you okay? A dumb question since I know you're not but, uh, yeah." Froy finishes lamely, because he's known Hikaru - or at least, Hikaru wearing a personality wig - for years now, and while Hikaru hasn't been talking to his best friend as much as he probably should've this past week, Froy is observant enough to not need constant social contact to tell that Hikaru's on his very last ropes. 

 

"Yeah, things aren't going so well." Hikaru says, a rough and hoarse whisper as his throat closes up slightly. Despite the fact that he can sense an impending breakdown while he speaks to his childhood friend, he doesn't mind as much as he should have. It's probably  _ because  _ Froy's the only other witness to his incoming tears; Froy may be a prime example of the upper-class, but he's still a kind and empathetic person at the end of the day, and always knows just what to say and what advice to give to anyone in a rough patch. 

 

And it's that assurance of comfort and genuine empathy that gives Hikaru the courage to actually say what he's been thinking, starting with chasing the Orion grunts away in the dead of night and ending with seeing Asuto's behavior at practice. Now the roles are reversed, and Hikaru is the one to ramble on and on about the current situation at hand as Froy calmly listens, making the occasional noise to show he's still listening.

 

"I don't get it! Asuto's back and he's safe so I don't have any reason to be so strung up! I've been such a mess this week because I knew he was being held hostage by Orion, right? So why am I still a mess?  _ I can't even talk to him."  _ Hikaru finishes, venting coming to a close and the only sound being his heavy breathing and Froy's non-committal humming. 

 

"Isn't that a thing though? People become more of a wreck when the danger has passed and they feel safe enough to fall apart? Maybe the same has happened here." Froy suggests, advice once again sound and realistic. Enough so that Hikaru almost doesn't question how Froy would even know that, but Hikaru figures having psychopaths that own a sprawling soccer-terrorism company for family members would give anyone at the very least a passing interest in psychology. 

 

"I guess so, but doesn't that make it worse for Asuto?" Hikaru says, coming to the obvious conclusion that Asuto, despite not physically being Orion's hostage anymore, is still not out of the woods. And that's just in regards to Asuto's mental state; it's arguably more likely Orion would find some way to snatch him back or hurt him further. 

 

Hikaru must've said that last bit out loud, because Froy makes a pained noise and guilt twinges in Hikaru's gut. Froy's also been worried about Asuto to the point of keeling over, despite never really meeting the other boy, his burning hatred of Orion's cruelty and the horrifying coincidence of being in the same building when Asuto was getting dragged off compelling him to care. Incidentally, Froy has also been banned by his brother from entering the Orion Foundation HQ building until further notice, after the nth time Froy attacked Shinjou whenever he saw the bastard. Hikaru had flipped his shit when he first heard that, but is still proud of Froy for his numerous attempts on Bastard Dad's life. Hikaru would absolutely do the same. They fall into silence for a while, before Froy takes the incredible - or just incredibly dumb - initiative. 

 

"Y'know what? I have a match in a couple hours and I don’t wanna be thinking about how sad you are as I trounce Spain. Guess my dad's name." Froy says, literally apropos of nothing. 

 

"What." Hikaru deadpans, the random subject change completely throwing him off guard.

 

"Go on, guess my dad's name. It's really funny I promise." Froy demands again. 

 

"Don't you have your match against Spain in like two hours." 

 

"Pfft we've already practiced enough for it we'll be fine. Look at them, they may be absolute units but they don't even have a Hissatsu Tactic, the fuckin' fools."

 

"Froy please-" 

 

"Go on, try and guess it. I'll give you a hint, it ends in 'ovich'" Froy says, voice practically vibrating with excitement. Hikaru just relents and plays along. 

 

"I know how Russian names work." and Hikaru does; middle names are always the first name of the father, with the suffix of 'ovich' or 'evich'. Or something like that. It's confusing and Hikaru's too tired for this. 

 

"Oh do you, Mr. 'I thought Froy was your surname'?"

 

_ "Hey shut the fuck up." _

 

"Absolutely not. But anyway, guess my dad's name, it's really funny I promise." Froy begs for like the fiftieth time, and Hikaru can see in his mind's eye that Froy is smushing his face against the phone screen like he does whenever he's invested in a call. 

 

After approximately 1.2 seconds of thought, Hikaru simply responds with "Bernard." with brutal flatness, and Froy responds by seemingly dying on the spot, wheezing and maybe also screaming, Hikaru can't tell given the loud thud of Froy falling to the floor from his chair. 

 

"WHAT -  _ NO!!!  _ NO HIKARU NO ABSOLUTELY NOT  _ HOW COULD YOU EVEN SAY THAT! _ " Froy screams into the phone as Hikaru slaps a hand over his mouth to muffle his cackling lest he attract a wayward Nosaka. It's already difficult given how Froy is so loud Hikaru has to move the phone away from his ear to protect his poor eardrums, but he doesn't tell Froy to quiet down and lets him continue his tirade, holding down the 'lower volume' button. 

 

"Okay no but how DARE you even INSINUATE let alone  _ SAY ALOUD  _ that MY OWN DAD, MY INCREDIBLE DAD had his first kid -  _ MY OLDER BROTHER -  _ and went 'oh my beautiful baby boy and hopefully not my last child has just been born, what should I call the darling angel who's gonna inherit all my wealth? Oh I know, what about MY OWN FUCKING NAME. 

 

"Like I don't think you've really considered the consequences of your actions young man but that would make my own name Froy Bernardovich Girikanan! THAT WOULD MAKE MY BROTHER'S NAME BERNARD  _ BERNARDOVICH  _ GIRIKANAN! THAT IS AN AFFRONT TO NATURE. I THINK I LOST 50 YEARS OF MY LIFE JUST BY SAYING THAT. ICHIHOSHI HIKARU HOW DARE YOU." Froy ends up shouting at top volume, and Hikaru can't even breathe once it gets to 'Bernard Bernardovich Girikanan' and he's instead resorted to lying on his side in the bed as he grasps his stomach. He had to bury his phone and his head under the pillow to muffle Froy's shouting, hoping and praying that Nosaka didn't somehow hear it and is on his way to obliterate Hikaru for obviously not sleeping. Hell hath no fury like a Nosaka scorned. 

 

"Can I have another guess?" Hikaru finally wheezes out between gasps. 

 

"PLEASE DO."

 

_ "Froy."  _ Hikaru simply suggests, voice dripping with glee. Froy simply screams in response.

 

"SOMEHOW EVEN WORSE. FROY  _ FROYOVICH _ GIRIKANAN. SURELY THEN IT'D BE 'EVICH' INSTEAD. I HATE THIS" Froy shouts back, once again at top volume and sounding one false move away from a murder spree. 

 

"I'm gonna give you  _ one more guess _ and if you make a fool of me AGAIN then I am  _ LEAVING _ ." Froy warns. 

 

After a few seconds of downright sadistic laughter, Hikaru merely whispers "Gustav? As in your family butler?" and completely loses it when he hears Froy drop his phone and slam the door shut as he storms out the room. 

 

Hikaru's clutching his stomach with one hand and clasping a hand over his mouth with the other, desperately trying to keep as quiet as possible. It's a bit difficult given how his laughter is increasing tenfold with every slammed locker he can hear on the other end. 

 

After two minutes, Froy marches back in and grabs the phone,  _ "It was Valentin. My dad's name was Valentin." _ Froy hisses into the phone, and it takes a second for the information to register in Hikaru's brain.  _ Froy Valentinovich Girikanan.  _

 

"Pfft, hey there Valentinovich-" Hikaru gasps, breath and voice stolen by his laughter. 

 

"FUCK YOU I'M GONNA GO PRACTICE. BYE." Froy interrupts him with, and Hikaru barely gets out his own 'bye' before Froy hangs up, leaving Hikaru to his cry-laughter. 

 

Ten minutes later, as Hikaru is futility trying to sleep in spite of insomnia and laughter, he gets a message from Froy. 

 

**フロイ:  ok but it DID cheer u up tho**

 

Hikaru can't argue with that logic. Between Froy's grounded advice and then making a complete fool of himself with his middle name, maybe today will actually be pretty alright. Or at least, not a  _ complete  _ trainwreck - maybe he’ll finally be strong enough to talk to Asuto.

 

* * *

 

Between being away from Orion’s clutches and finally having a comfortable long-sleeved jacket he can wear, Asuto thinks things are going actually somewhat okay. Even considering how everyone in the world and their grandma seems to want to speak to him.

 

Whenever Asuto sees an opening to excuse himself and slink away - even for a couple of minutes - someone somehow telepathically senses he’s trying to leave the room and drags him back into the thick of the conversation. Nosaka is perhaps the most egregious example of this, hypervigilant and keeping half a mind on Asuto’s every move, tensing up and steering the conversation to Asuto whenever the boy in question leaves his line of sight. It was frustrating the first time and it’s just as frustrating the billionth time, and Asuto just wants to put on the jacket Haizaki brought him, but Asuto can’t fault him for the paranoia - if the roles were reversed, and Asuto was the last person to see Nosaka before he got kidnapped by Orion he’d have probably resorted to GPS tagging Nosaka by now. Besides, it’s not like Asuto isn’t enjoying himself; this is his team, his  _ friends _ , and Asuto would give up the world for them, even if they’re currently getting on his nerves.

 

“I’m just saying, the chances that Clario’s gonna come barging in again at some point is not inconsiderate.” Hiroto says, throwing his arms in the air at Haizaki’s scoff. Distantly, Asuto can make out Gouenji’s terrified squeak.

 

“He has a match today, in like two hours.” Haizaki rebukes, deadpan.

 

“Who says it has to be right now? Who says it has to be  _ today?” _

 

“Hiroto I think you’re giving Gouenji flashbacks-” Tatsuya interjects, giving a concerned glance to Gouenji, who’s pale-faced and absently massaging his neck. Ah right,  _ this. _ Endou had filled Asuto in, explaining how Clario had quite literally kicked down their door when he heard the news and had almost killed Gouenji by complete accident in the process. Asuto had snorted when he heard it and Gouenji had looked vaguely betrayed. 

 

They continue like this, a large part of the team just gathered in one place making idle chitchat. Asuto keeps trying to subtly excuse himself, and the team keep dragging him back into the thick of their antics. At least Yone is here as peacekeeper, gently nudging the others to drop a particular conversation beat and move on - especially if it pertains to Asuto. She keeps sending concerned looks and questioning glances at Asuto, of which he is absolutely not going to acknowledge, thank you very much. It probably has something to do with how he has his left arm trapped in a vice grip from his other hand absentmindedly, digging his fingers into the flesh as hard as he can as the damaged nerves pick up only half the sensation. 

 

It doesn’t take long for things to reach a head and for the laughter to turn to ash in his throat, and it happens when Asuto’s eyes accidentally land on his left arm and his right hand digging into it subconsciously, and he consciously makes himself stop as something trips in his brain and his mood starts to sour around the edges. Something’s wrong, but he doesn’t know  _ what _ other than the sudden burning feeling dancing across his arms. A burning feeling that feels hauntingly like electricity. His arms ache and itch, and he has to grind his teeth together to get himself to focus on something else. He really needs to change out of this damp jersey and into his clean jacket, but nobody’s letting him and he wants to scream. Everyone is still talking but Asuto can’t hear them over the sound of the blood rushing in his ears and his thoughts. The room is too uncomfortable, too suffocating, too full of people he can’t quite recognize right now other the static filling his mind, forcing him out of his body and into the role of passive observer.

 

There’s a feeling of something on his leg, and Asuto snaps his head to the right of him to see someone his age with brown hair and a bandana and- oh right, that’s Endou, how could he have forgotten? It doesn’t look or feel like Endou though, but that may have to do with the fact that, currently,  _ nothing _ looks or feels like how it should, especially Asuto himself. Not-Endou-But-Actually-Endou shoots him a subtle but undeniably concerned expression, hand clasped on Asuto’s knee and expression open enough to communicate more than words ever could, careful enough to not draw any attention to whatever spiral Asuto is having this time.

 

Asuto’s too shaky and too upstrung to respond properly, instead just giving a single, jerky nod despite not actually agreeing to anything. Soon thereafter, the sound of everything and everyone else in the room that had previously fallen away comes rushing back to him and he recoils as if he’s been physically struck, a quiet gasp stolen from him as he tries to get his bearings back. 

 

Not fully attached to his body, Asuto stands up and stammers out an excuse about needing to lie down that sounds weak even to his ears and promptly walks out the room, not sparing a single glance back to everyone’s concerned gazes. The previous light conversation - a forming betting pool on how long until Sekiya murders Ichihoshi for not sleeping - has gone dead at Asuto’s sudden change in demeanour, and guilt and shame crawls his way up his throat as he walks on autopilot to his room, his mind unable to hold onto a thought for more than a second before it flees. 

 

He blinks and suddenly he’s standing in the doorway of the room he shares with Goujin. It’s the first time he’s been back in his shared dormroom since this whole horror began, and the sight of the cream-white walls and his bed, neatly made and untouched for a week, makes his throat constrict uncomfortably. Swallowing, he ignores it and chucks his slightly damp jersey on the unnaturally neat bedding, his static-filled mind wavering and wandering until  _ suddenly, he’s no longer in his room in the Kazan Centre campgrounds for the first time in a week, but instead in a cold, dark cell as he slowly loses more of his mind as he waits for the now intimately familiar sound of the TV preparing for a match- _

 

It’s too cold, Asuto decides. The room is too artificial and lifeless and too much like _ there _ and he needs a distraction or  _ something _ to do before the tears pricking his eyes snowball into another crying fit that he doesn’t deserve to have. He slips on the denim jacket, the texture of the thin material ghosting over his skin as he lifts up the blanket and settles into bed, staring blankly at the wall in front of him. He’s aware in the back of his mind that the sensation should feel much different, more  _ there _ , but then he remembers the doctor’s diagnosis of the nerve damage in his arms and he frowns. He should probably talk to Sekiya about the permanent nerve damage and all the other physical injuries at one point, but a knock on the door and a concerned “Asuto?” floats through the air and he shelves the thought for later.

 

Asuto makes a vague noise that probably means something like ‘come in’ and the door opens to reveal Ichihoshi, and he steps into the room after a bout of awkward eye contact between the two. He looks, quite frankly, like shit; his hair’s a bedheaded mess and his eyebags are somehow  _ worse _ than during practice. He carries himself with a frenetic and vaguely terrified energy, shoulders taught like a rope and eyes anxiously darting around everywhere but Asuto. Even still, as he constantly shifts his weight from foot to foot in apprehension, he oozes a compassion that only comes from shared misery. Deliberate in making his steps audible and every move clearly telegraphed, he slowly makes his way over to Asuto’s bed, sitting down so he can talk to Asuto.

 

They stay like that for an excruciating two minutes, both of them dead silent and too nervous to look at the other, leaving them in an agonisingly awkward atmosphere that worsens with each passing second, Ichihoshi staring at his feet as if they can bring his family back and Asuto staring at the folds of his pillow as if it can undo the past week. They’re saved - as always - by someone (unintentionally) taking matters into their own hands, because Endou knocks on the door to check up on Asuto after his embarrassing moment in the group earlier. Ichihoshi had cobbled together a convincing enough excuse -  _ ‘don’t worry, I’m talking to him now’ _ \- to get Endou to leave them be, and Asuto waits until he can no longer hear Endou’s footsteps before taking the plunge.

 

“I think I worried them.” He blurts out, coincidentally at the same time Ichihoshi spoke, overlapping his rushed ‘so uh yeah.’ Poor Ichihoshi looks like he wants to die of either embarrassment and anxiety, probably both.

 

“You go first.” Asuto says.

 

“You first.” Ichihoshi says, yet again at the same time. At least he added a frustrated scream at the end, making Asuto giggle despite his current state of mind. Emboldened by the accidental lightness, Ichihoshi takes the lead.

 

“So, uh, is everything alright? I know it’s a dumb question to ask given recent events, but you look in a real bad state and- and I thought we might as well talk about, uh, everything.” He forces out, anxious seeping back into his body and words until the last word is nothing but a strained word that cracks under the weight of his emotions.

 

Asuto shrugs, but then sees in the way that Ichihoshi is looking directly at him that he’s hoping for a verbal answer, and Asuto repositions himself so he’s propped up on his elbows and scrapes what little cognizance he has left to reply.

 

“I-I’m not doing so good right now, I feel a little overwhelmed.” He stammers, moving his gaze to the blanket in front of him “I-I don’t know how though, one second I was okay and talking to everyone and then the next I’m, uh, not.” He adds lamely, Ichihoshi merely hums in perfect understanding, the kind of hum that denotes agreement and compassion.

 

“Well given how everything’s been lately, that’s perfectly understandable,” Ichihoshi assures, mind visibly working overtime as he mulls over Asuto’s words, “feel free to tell me what happened if you feel up to it, but don’t worry if you don’t - I did just barge in here after all.”

 

“N-no it’s fine, I don’t mind. I don’t think it was the team at all b-but, uh, my arms? I don’t know how to explain it.” He admits quietly, lifting his arm out from under the blankets and rolling the sleeve up to reveal the bandages in answer to Ichihoshi’s unspoken question. He can’t muster up the courage to even look, instead screwing his eyes shut as hard as he can.

 

Asuto feels the bed move with the force of Ichihoshi’s jolt, and he hears Ichihoshi’s quiet and shocked gasp at the sight, and Asuto tentatively cracks one eye open to see Ichihoshi stare at the offered arm, face pale and horrified at the off-white bandages that snake their way across his arms. He looks directly into Asuto’s eyes, a desperate question asked without words, before reaching out to hold Asuto’s arm with deliberate gentleness. His horrified and glazed over eyes travel back and forth between where the bandages end at Asuto’s wrist all the way up to where they disappear under the denim jacket and travel even further up his arms, soaking in every small detail he sees, expression falling in horror and distress with each and every passing moment, tears welling in his eyes.

 

Asuto fucked up, Asuto more than fucked up. He knew Ichihoshi was currently running on fumes and he’s been told by multiple people that Ichihoshi blamed himself or Asuto’s kidnapping, and yet he still showed Ichihoshi the physical consequences of the kidnapping. He’s an idiot, an idiot who can’t even think before he forces his friends to deal with his own stupid issues-

 

“I have long sleeve shirts you can use if you want. Like an undershirt.” Ichihoshi interrupts his thoughts, gazing directly at Asuto, words forced out with such urgency and shock that they trip over themselves on the way out. Still, Asuto’s self-deprecation grinds to a halt at the offer. A long sleeved undershirt would not only cover up the bandages and the scars underneath, but he could also wear it under his football kit. Plus, Ichihoshi is probably the only person who’s anywhere close to his size and wouldn’t question it, unlike everyone else has.

 

Ichihoshi said that they probably do need to talk about the Orion-shaped elephant in the room, and Asuto only has a thin long sleeved denim jacket to his name. And so, Asuto accepts the offer, silently following Ichihoshi to the other’s room, instinctively digging his fingernails into his crossed arms.

 

* * *

 

He can’t get the sight of those bandages out of his mind. Fuck, this is so much worse than he was expecting.

 

It was pure impulse as to why Hikaru knocked on Asuto’s door in the first place. He was sitting up in bed absentmindedly scrolling through his social media feed, having long since given up on getting any sleep when he heard the sound of steps down the hallway and the door opening. It had taken Hikaru a moment to even realise the sounds were coming from where Asuto’s and Goujin’s shared room is, and he’d immediately panicked. Goujin is never one to take a random nap or coop himself up in his room and Asuto is currently a traumatized bundle of nerves. It was like the universe was mocking Hikaru - too scared to approach Asuto for a talk? Well here he is now, you  _ fuck. _ Nevertheless, Hikaru had still taken the cosmic bait, had taken a few centering breaths to steel himself and had made his way to Asuto’s door.

 

And here he is now, leading Asuto back to his room to find the other boy some long sleeve shirts he could use, because Hikaru had seen the mess of bandages plastered over Asuto’s arms that just made more horrified questions swirl in his head and he had panicked. He just didn’t know what to  _ do _ ; he knew on some level that Asuto wouldn’t have gotten out of Orion’s captivity unscathed - ‘ _ if he had gotten out at all,’  _ that poisonous part of Hikaru’s mind whispered back - but this? He somehow didn’t see  _ this _ , even though he really should have. Out of all the myriad of injuries Hikaru dwelled and imagined Orion inflicting upon Asuto, he never imagined Orion destroying Asuto’s arms. Hikaru doesn’t even know what the bandages are covering, it could be anything from cuts to bruises to burns and Hikaru can’t tell by just looking at the bandages, once again cursing his rudimentary first aid training.

 

"Uh yeah I think I should? Might wanna check." Hikaru replies, standing up from his desk as he walks over to where his suitcase is jammed underneath the bed. 

 

"Thank you." Asuto, uh,  _ thanks _ as he walks over to the suitcase, looking at the black suitcase exterior. 

 

"It's no problem, plus I have  _ excellent  _ fashion sense." Hikaru boasts, unfortunately mere seconds before he flips open the suitcase, revealing two things of note: a pair of the ugliest bright blue jorts in the world, and a Duolingo Owl plush toy holding a fake knife. 

 

"Uh. Wait. I can explain myself." Hikaru blurts out, realising the complete fool he's just made of himself. Asuto is looking at him then back to the suitcase then back again, mouth pressed into a thin white line to contain his laughter.

 

“Jorts.” is all Asuto says, the laugh he was suppressing forcing itself out at the very last second, making a downright undignified snort.

 

“They’re not mine! They’re- actually they are mine, but I’ve never worn them! Actually that’s a lie I wore them once and- how about we just  _ never speak of this again?”  _ Hikaru begs, desperately trying to do damage control and save his reputation even as Asuto snorts in front of him.

 

“Okay, what about the Duolingo plush then?” Asuto asks, pointing to the offending green owl plush. The plush has its typical uncanny smile but is also holding a knife in its left hand. It’s the size of Hikaru’s forearm.

 

“Froy.” Is all Hikaru deigns to answer with, adding a casual half-shrug. Froy would probably collapse a lung laughing and die if he ever learnt that Asuto discovered both ‘Duo McStabbyFace’  _ and  _ the hideous jorts that Hikaru had to bring with him to prevent any of his fellow Disciples discovering. Maybe it’s karma for the Valentinovich thing earlier. Maybe life just hates him.

 

“Why.” Is all Asuto asks, deadpan.

 

“Dunno,” Is all Hikaru responds, faux-casual and wanting to melt into the floor. “Anyway, shall we do this? I hope you’re okay with blues, by the way.” he tacks on, desperate to get back on track before the universe makes him the next laughing stock. Asuto takes the not-so-subtle bait, calming down enough to sit down next to Hikaru and begin lifting a navy blue t-shirt out of the suitcase for inspection.

 

"Don’t worry about it - my favourite jacket is blue, so I doubt I’ll die if I wear a slightly different shade." Asuto jokes back, and Hikaru snorts to himself at the joke. 

 

Asuto tells Hikaru his shirt size, and together they sift through the mass of blues - with a 'I wear things that aren't blue. I'm not allergic to other colours I swear.' from Hikaru. Asuto won’t stop mocking him, the bastard.

 

“What’s this?” Asuto says after ten minutes, holding up a white, long-sleeved shirt Yuri had custom made for Hikaru - or, more specifically, Mitsuru. It’s a culmination of all the inside jokes between ‘Mitsuru’ and his friends, a bright red communism sickle slapped on the front and ‘SOCCER BROS BEFORE BASKETBALL HOES’ written in thick, blocky Cyrillic over it. Hikaru vaguely remembers giving Yuri a gaudy neon yellow ‘Will Score Goals For Pussy’ shirt in response. God, what a time.

 

“Absolutely nothing.” Hikaru says, briefly contemplating letting Asuto wear it before remembering that Sekiya  _ also _ knows Russian. Just to make sure, Hikaru snatches the shirt from Asuto’s grip and haphazardly chucks it onto his bed, all the while refusing to break eye contact.

 

After that, with nothing else to lighten the mood, they fall back into silence and start to slump back into the miasma of worries that cover them like a thick blanket, too jittery with anxieties and troubles to strike up a new conversation. So they stew on their own issues. As the silence continues on, Asuto slowly falls back into the subdued and depressed way he carries himself, but now there's an anxiety in his movements, starting small with the occasional jitter of his hand as he reaches for a shirt, and growing bigger with the constant, quick glances at Hikaru, as if waiting for some massive bombshell dropped by the other. 

 

Hikaru himself is hardly any better, since the absence of a new distraction makes him dwell too much and too long on his own guilt, and he instead refocuses his brain on just what lies under those bandages. Other than the mandatory uniform jersey, Asuto  _ never  _ wears long-sleeves, and even on the rare occasion that he  _ does _ he rolls the sleeves up. By all accounts, Asuto just doesn't wear long-sleeves, and so the only conclusion Hikaru can reach to explain the sudden switch is that whatever lies under those godforsaken bandages are too horrific for their bearer to stomach. It’s another one of the countless things Orion has ruined, and Hikaru's curiosity turns into melancholy. Despite his burning questions for finer details, Hikaru refuses to ask Asuto and upset him more for the sake of something as small as a shirt preference, and makes peace with not knowing the finer points. 

 

But Asuto is far too perceptive and far too anxious to let it slide idly by, and he bites the bullet himself. 

 

"Why haven't you asked? About the bandages." Asuto finally demands, momentarily stopping in folding the shirt he's holding. 

 

"You don't ask me about my brother," Hikaru answers with a shrug, folding a pastel blue jacket onto the - admittedly quite small - reject pile. “besides, I know what it’s like to wanna cover it up.” he explains with a shrug, lifting up his left ankle and patting the general location of where his Seal of Orion is etched into his very skin, like a tattoo that doubles as a shackle.

 

“Yeah, but still.” Asuto finished lamely, voice quiet and bracing for a painful conversation. Hikaru just hums in response as he sifts through the ‘Maybe’ pile.

 

“Look, of course I want to know what happened - everyone does, but it’s still not my place to know and it’s especially not my place to ask invasive questions.” Hikaru responds, sitting down on the bed, because at the end of the day, Hikaru has no real business forcing Asuto to reopen barely closed wounds for the sake of knowledge that’ll keep him up at night. 

 

Even still, the sight of the bandages flash in Hikaru’s mind, and just a little bit more of him dies. This is it, the perfect opportunity to segue into the much needed talk they need to have. Hikaru needs to make his move now, because he knows from personal experience how things will go if he doesn’t - Asuto will take the passing of an obvious opportunity to move onto something completely unrelated, and Hikaru will never get a chance like this again.

 

“B-but, since we’re on the topic anyway,” He starts, mouth suddenly dry and tongue feeling too big for his mouth, “I- I just wanted to say that I’m  _ sorry.” _ he whispers, voice cracking on the last word as he stars directly down at the floor, trying to keep his tears in. He needs to push on, he needs to say all of his piece.

 

“It’s just, I was the Orion Disciple sent to destroy you all, and then you and the rest of the team came along and  _ saved _ me and helped me defect from them, and then Orion kidnaps you the second we land in Russia. Like fuck man, how is that  _ not _ my fault?” Hikaru chokes out, burying his hands in his face as tremors start to dance along his small frame. He feels Asuto pull him into a comforting hug, and Hikaru leans into it as he cries harder.

 

“Hey, it wasn’t your fault, it was mine.” Asuto reassures immediately, patting Hikaru’s back, and it makes Hikaru jolt out of the embrace.

 

“No it wasn’t! You fell for a  _ trap!  _ How the hell is that your fault?” He argues, because Asuto cannot be faulted for losing at a game designed to never let him win.

 

“How is it  _ yours? _ What connection do you have to me other than being on the same team?” Asuto replies with budding anger, defensively drawing his knees up to his chest, and Hikaru hates how Asuto’s still the calmer one in this situation, how he’s the one making the more logical points. It’s also then when it occurs to Hikaru that Asuto doesn’t know about the connection between his dad and Hikaru’s entire trainwreck of a life, and his mind screeches to a halt.

 

“The connection is that  _ I’m the Disciple you helped save.  _ Orion probably figured the best way to punish me is through someone I care about, and you were the best person they could use. _ ” _ Hikaru explains through gritted teeth, because Asuto is refusing to see Hikaru’s side, the  _ truth _ of the matter. It doesn’t matter how many times Coach Zhao and Sekiya and everyone else tell him he’s just blaming himself for something out of his control, Hikaru  _ knows _ how Orion works and  _ they don’t _ , and he knows in his car-crashed bones that Orion is not above doing something like this.

 

“But why go through all that hassle to get back at one kid? Why not, say, brainwash me and make me work for them? That would’ve been a thousand times better than what they actually did.” Asuto spits out, with actual venom. A hateful, caustic venom that makes Hikaru stop in his tracks and maybe, just maybe, start to reconsider where he stands on this paradigm shift of Orion’s deep and dirty deeds.

 

“They- they could’ve done literally anything else and it would’ve been more productive towards an actual goal than what they did. They weren’t doing it to get back at you or InaJapan or as a part of a grand scheme, they just wanted to hurt me for the hell of it, I think. They- they were punishing  _ someone _ , but it obviously wasn’t you and it obviously wasn’t InaJapan or anything that would’ve actually mattered.” Asuto seethes out, gaze distant as he glares a hole in the wall, face contorted in a baleful rage before a realisation strikes him and his anger gives way to misery.

 

“Dad was punishing  _ me.” _ Asuto sobs out, and Hikaru doesn’t have a counterargument, no snappy retort to argue against it, no way to know if it’s the truth or not. It's a loaded statement, and Asuto never clarifies what he's being punished for, but Hikaru can take a wild fucking guess, and it isn't saving Hikaru from Orion for once. 

 

They're done sifting through the shirts, Hikaru tentatively rubbing circles on Asuto's back as the other boy calms down into sniffles and hiccups. 

 

"Wanna talk about something else?" Hikaru lamely asks, more for the hell of filling the oppressively awkward silence. Asuto takes the impulse offer with a shaky nod, and they talk about nothing in particular, Asuto returning to his room briefly to put on one of the many long sleeved shirts he now has. 

 

Despite the conversation being a complete trainwreck, they somehow manage to end on a good note, with Asuto recounting that time Mansaku chucked a brick into his washing machine and literally bricked it, and Hikaru demonstrating his flawless memory of the song 'Moskau' despite not knowing German. Given the fact that they're both cackling at the end of it, Hikaru is gonna classify it is as a solid win. 

 

It's the first of many awkward conversations, but it's a  _ start _ , Hikaru supposes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ichihoshi Hikaru, desperately trying to stay optimistic and hopeful in this endless charade of pain and misery I put both him and his deepest and closest friends through: Maybe it'll finally start getting better now
> 
> Me, the wrathful and omnipotent god of this world that I have fashioned for myself, where I know neither mercy nor pity: HONEY, YOU GOT A BIG STORM COMIN'


	7. You Try -  And Thus, You Fail

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh Asuto, nobody quite knows where you got to idea that you could simply become normal by acting normal, but trying is the ultimate prerequisite to failing, and one does not simply wash away Orion's foul deeds.
> 
> Meanwhile, Asuto's friends also learn that trying is the first step in failing, and it comes in trying to do more net good than net bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi I'm sorry if the format fucks up for y'all on mobile, ao3 is incredibly smart but also incredibly DUMB
> 
> Also this is the last of the 23k beast split up into smaller chapters. I'm so sorry for all of this

About twenty minutes later, Nosaka knocks on Ichihoshi’s door to tell them to come down to the main communal area - apparently, the Russia V Spain match is about to begin.

 

And already Asuto’s nerves are shot and his stomach is coiling, because he’s about to watch a live soccer match, and that means _goals scored_ . He reacted so badly to Endou simply yelling the word ‘goal’, who knows how badly Asuto will react to seeing a goal actually scored. Maybe he’ll die of pure fear and phantom electric shocks, finally. Or maybe he’ll just freak out in front of everyone like an idiot and they’ll all just look at him weirdly because he’s freaking out over fucking _nothing-_

 

“Hey man, you okay there?” Ichihoshi cuts through Asuto’s quickly derailing thoughts, waving a hand in front of Asuto’s face. Ah, he must of have been spacing out again. Probably not good, given how they’re currently descending the stairs, him tumbling down the stairs is only marginally more embarrassing than freaking out over a televised goal.

 

“Yeah, I’m good.” Asuto squeaks, definitely ‘not good at all’, and cringing at how hoarse his voice is and the obviously disbelieving look Ichihoshi is levelling him.

 

“Do you want me to get Coach? I’m sure he won’t mind-” Ichihoshi tries, only trying to help.

 

“No!” Asuto cuts off a little bit too loudly, and immediately backtracks to save face. “I mean- listen, I’m alright? Please don’t get Coach involved.” Asuto pleads, and Ichihoshi begrudgingly acquiesces.

 

“If you say so, but I’m there if you need me.” he reassures, and Asuto nods in response.

 

They eventually reach the main room, with a projector set up and chairs laid out in rows. Pretty much everyone is already there, and are sitting amongst their friendship groups and chatting to themselves as they all wait for the match to begin - if Sekiya is correct, then in roughly ten minutes. It’s easy for Asuto and Ichihoshi to find some seats without being hassled by anyone, and Ichihoshi chooses a seat behind Nosaka and Nishikage while Asuto plants himself between Mansaku and Kirina right behind him. They're all pretty near the back, so Asuto can make an escape without inconveniencing others too much, should the need arise. Everyone notices the undershirt he's suddenly wearing, and Mansaku raises an eyebrow. Asuto refuses to acknowledge any of it.

 

He sees Coach and Sekiya give him a very concerned look, pinning him to the spot with their concern, and it makes Asuto bristle. Yeah, _sure,_ he did get kidnapped by Orion, and yeah, _sure,_ they did use soccer matches to electrocute him to an inch of his life, but he can handle it. It’s not even him on the pitch, unlike all of the matches Orion had shown. It’s not the same, he’ll be fine.

 

“Imagine if Clario busts down the door right now.” Hiroto jokes as he helps set up the projector, bringing Asuto back to the present.

 

“Clario’s in a stadium right now.”

 

“You’re just trying to reassure yourself, Gouenji.”

 

“Maybe he’ll do it after the match.” Endou wonders, and he’s answered with a barely-suppressed snort by Ichihoshi.

 

“Pft, that’s not gonna happen.” Ichihoshi says, confident, and it attracts Nosaka’s attention.

 

“Why not?” Nosaka asks with narrowed eyes, critically evaluating Ichihoshi.

 

“Because he’s gonna fucking die?” Ichihoshi responds, uneasily chuckling to himself as he sits in his plastic chair. “The entire Spain team is going to get completely obliterated, I’m predicting like, _at least_ six-nil for Russia.” He adds, and everyone balks in response.

 

“That’s a bit much.” Mansaku mutters, to the tune of similar disbelieving proclamations, and it only makes Ichihoshi more confident in his words.

 

“Spain is built like absolute units, but given they don’t even have a fucking Hissasstu Tactic and how you can completely unravel their strategy by _running really fast,_ ” Ichihoshi explains, gesturing to a bewildered Asuto at the end, “I’m gonna go ahead and say that the golden boys of Orion have got this.” he finishes, crossing his arms as he sits.

 

“Ichihoshi knows the Russia team better than anyone here, so he might be onto something.” Nosaka states, entering the calculative strategist mode he’s so well known for.

 

“Ok but also consider the fact that Ichihoshi’s also gotten two seconds of sleep.” Haizaki retorts, and Ichihoshi can only nod sagely in response.

 

“Both are equally valid points.” Ichihoshi answers just as seriously, and it has Nishikage bring his hands to his face in despair.

 

“Ichihoshi, are you okay?” Nishikage asks, looking directly at Ichihoshi and demanding an answer. An answer which Ichihoshi is taking his sweet fucking time giving, apparently.

 

“No.” Ichihoshi deadpans after a good solid five seconds of silence, and the match starts immediately after, making Asuto wheeze despite himself.

 

The sound from the opening part of the match blares, and Ichihoshi and Asuto both respond with the exact same deadpanned ‘ah shit’ at the exact same time, causing the two to turn to look directly at the other, pointing to eachother in vague confusion. Mansaku and Kirina are levelling Asuto with shocked and worried looks, and so are Nosaka and Nishikage, except they’re looking at Ichihoshi instead. Out the corner of Asuto’s eye, Haizaki starts laughing.

 

The match begins proper, and it all seems to be going well. Even with Ichihoshi’s rather outlandish prediction hanging over their heads, there doesn’t seem to be an obvious victor, both teams seem to be evenly tied, Froy leading the charge for the Russia team and Clario doing the same for the Spain team. Asuto watches it all, absentmindedly clutching the edges of his chair in anticipation whenever he thinks someone’s nearing the goalpost, but the players are mostly stuck in the centre, a rough game of cat and mouse.

 

And then Froy Girikanan gets the ball, and it all goes to shit.

 

The only warning they get is a ‘rest in fucking pieces Clario’ from Ichihoshi before Froy steals the ball from one of the Spain players and makes a beeline for the goal. Asuto sees it happen, and he knows what’s about to happen; Froy’s going to score, and the rapidly building panic and phantom electricity crawling across Asuto’s skin is going to reach a head. His body knows it’s about to happen too, because the second players start moving from the center of the pitch towards the goal his heartrate picks up its pace and the air leaves his lungs. Asuto’s hands won’t stop shaking, desperately clutching the edges of the flimsy plastic chair to contain his tremor, and Froy’s not even at the goal yet.

 

The voices of his friends start to fade away as Asuto’s suddenly back in his cell again, watching his match against Spain. He’s not actually back there and he knows it, but he also doesn’t, because he can still feel the cold weight of the metal bracelets and the barren chilliness of the concrete room he’s in, even though he’s staring at the linoleum tiles of the Kazan Sports Centre main hall. He can’t hear the concerned voices of his friends, only his heart’s frantic rhythm as the inevitable rapidly approaches. He can even hear the way the announcer's voice echoed across the cell he was in, and the barely-comfortable fabric of the blankets. He can’t breathe, couldn’t even if he tried harder than he ever can, and all he can do is hold his breath and stare directly at the floor as Froy scores the goal, sweating and shaking and very nearly crying.

 

 _“Goal!”_ the announcer yells with fervour. The metal bracelet strapped to Asuto’s wrist starts beeping.

 

The beeping won’t stop. It’s actually going to happen again. Asuto never actually left his cell and this is all just a very detailed dream, the escapist fantasy of his mind. He’s going to open his eyes to find the drab concrete ceiling and the haunting chill of the cell and the TV booting up, and he doesn’t want that. He wants to hold onto this desperate fever dream for as long as possible, even though his lungs are burning with denied oxygen and the all-too-familiar shocks are about to come.

 

_3, 2, 1, brace!_

 

The beeping reaches its frantic, high-pitched crescendo and Asuto’s eyes snap open involuntarily, gasping for air as the world bleeds back to his ears and electricity dances along his skin and bones. The beige linoleum tiles of the Kazan Sports Center greet his eyes, not the suffocating concrete walls of his Orion cell, and he snaps his head up to see the projector screen displaying the Russia and Spain teams getting ready to begin again after Russia’s goal. Relief floods through him inbetween the shaking of his body and the phantom numbness, and he brushes off Mansaku and Kirina’s concerned looks and words with shaky yet firm reassurance.

 

Coach and Sekiya won’t stop looking at him, concern written all over their faces.

 

The match picks back up again, and true to Ichihoshi’s prediction, Spain gets absolutely steamrolled. The Spanish players are too well-built for their opponent's agile-yet-strong style of playing, and it’s never more than five seconds a spanish player has the ball before one of the Russian players - more often than not Froy - steal it and beeline for the goal.

 

Froy steals the ball again not even ten minutes later, and Asuto’s heartrate once again starts to speed up and crawl to his ears. The metal bracelets are back even though Asuto can’t see them on his wrists, the cold metal pressing down on his skin despite _not being there_. The same thing as before happens; Froy approaches the goal and Asuto forgets how to breathe as he braces himself for the inevitable. It’s not going to happen for real - if it didn’t happen just now then it won’t happen at all, he tries to reassure himself, but it doesn’t work. If anything, it makes his heart pick up a more frantic pace, digging his hands into the cheap plastic of the chair to try to ground himself, except his hands only register the uncomfortable material of the bed he slept in during his confinement.

 

Froy scores again, and the announcer yells ‘Goal!’ and the bracelets start beeping again. It’s the same song and dance as the first time, and it’s also the same song and dance as the times in the cell, and it’s somehow worse than before. This time Asuto flinches, chair slightly scraping across the floor, and this time it attracts Ichihoshi’s attention too. He turns around to look at Asuto, and Asuto brings his head up to look at Ichihoshi dead in the eye and stop the other boy from making a scene with the force of his glare alone.

 

The third time is too much for him. Froy scores the third goal, and the announcer yells ‘Goal!’ for the third time and the bracelets start beeping for the third time, and it’s _just too much._ He can’t breathe, he can’t do this.

 

“I’m sorry, I’ll be right back.” Asuto shakily forces out, abruptly standing up and marchin out the room, no destination in mind other than anywhere else. He can see Ichihoshi look at him as he walks out, concerned.

 

He can hear the concerned buzz of his teammates, the concerned ‘what was that about?’ from Haizaki and the ‘I’ll go talk to him!’ from Ichihoshi, and that’s when the tears start falling, just as he reaches the living room area and sits down on the couch, burying his head in his hands. God, he’s so pathetic, he can’t even watch a match without freaking out over nothing. What must his team, his _friends_ , think of him? That he’s a loser, not worth his place on the team.

 

And oh god, what is he going to do about actual matches? If he can’t even watch a broadcast of two random teams without crying, then what is he gonna do when it comes to the real deal, when he’s on the pitch and _he’s_ the one who’ll score the goal, the goal that earns him three shocks from the bracelet. _What is he going to do?_

 

“Hey, kid.” Sekiya calls out as he enters, making his way to sit by Asuto on the couch, pulling him into a gentle half hug.

 

“I’m sorry.” Asuto chokes out, face still buried between his hands, because this _shouldn’t be a problem._

 

“Don’t be, it’s not your fault.” Sekiya reassures, squeezing Asuto lightly.

 

“But it is, I’m the one crying over nothing.” Asuto hisses out, angry at himself more than he is angry at the big man in the cushy vice-president job who ordered this to happen.

 

“Well it’s not nothing if you’re crying over it.” Sekiya states, and Asuto genuinely doesn’t have a way to counter that. The silence between them stretches out for longer, and Sekiya takes it as his time to pounce.

 

“Asuto, listen to me,” he commands, gently cupping Asuto’s tear-stained face with his hands and turning it so that the two are looking directly at eachother, “You’ve been back for what, four, five hours? You’ve barely just left a super stressful situation and now you’re deliberately putting yourself _back_ into another stressful situation and beating yourself up because you’re not magically fine? That’s not how this works. You need to take time to rest and recover, and it’s okay to sit out from something you know is going to upset you. You shouldn’t force yourself to act like everything’s fine and nothing happened when that’s not the case.” Sekiya soothes, and Asuto lets the words sink in as he ponders them. Yeah, he knows that Sekiya’s right on a logical level, but his mind and emotions still insist on fighting tooth and nail against it.

 

“I take it you don’t want to go back there?” Sekiya asks, and Asuto fervently nods in answer.

 

“That’s fine, I can stay with you if you want.” Sekiya adds, and nods in understanding when Asuto answers with a shaky ‘y-yes please’ and brings out his phone to check the time.

 

“Halftime is about to start, so we should probably move to the pitch or somewhere more private, just so you don’t get bombarded.” Sekiya explains, and together they make their way to the pitch, and that’s when Asuto decides to take the time to ask his question.

 

“Um, sir?” he asks, and continues only when he knows Sekiya is paying attention, “what are we going to do about me playing?” he asks, and doesn’t need to elaborate on what exactly it is he’s asking about.

 

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there, but for now you’re not doing any practice at all for the foreseeable future and you’re getting some rest, alright?” Sekiya asks.

 

“Yes sir.” Asuto answers, still not fully satisfied with the answer.

 

* * *

 

“What was that all about?” Haizaki asks once Asuto’s properly left the room, and it’s met with equal parts confusion and concern.

 

“I don’t know, but he seemed really distressed whenever someone scored a goal.” Kirina says, distant with concern and worry.

 

“That’s a bit of an understatement, he looked like he was about to die.” Mansaku interjects, crossing his arms.

 

An uneasy silence settles over the room, and Hikaru is staring at the chair that used to seat Asuto, mind going a million miles a minute. The telltale signs of trauma written all over Asuto, and panic attacks that happen whenever someone seems to score a goal. Neither of those spell a good picture, and both of those spell something horrific.

 

“I’ll go talk to him!” Hikaru declares, rising from his chair and starting to make his way to the door before he’s stopped by Sekiya.

 

“Stay here, I’ll do it.” he commands, and Hikaru doesn’t have the energy to argue with him, so he makes his way back to his chair and tries his best to pay attention to the match, just like everyone else.

 

And just like everyone else, the match is basically forgotten in favour of worrying about Asuto, which makes the halftime commercial break a blessing in disguise, as they all disperse to the general living room area to try and find Asuto and Sekiya.

 

They find neither Asuto nor Sekiya, and they enjoy their break as much as they can before they have to go back and watch Perfect Spark completely crush their opponent.

 

And indeed they do - just like Hikaru said, it’s a six-nil to Perfect Spark, but that’s hardly their biggest worry.

 

* * *

 

Hours later, when all is said and done, the ‘Asuto Protection Squad’ - consisting of all of Inakuni, a currently-unconscious Ichihoshi and honorary member Hiroto - convene for an emergency meeting in the common room.

 

Specifically, on Asuto and their concern over him. It’s been hours after the weird thing with the Russia Vs Spain match, and Asuto’s been acting even more depressed than usual. Which is to be expected; he got kidnapped by Orion, for crying out loud. But even still, it’s slowly killing them so see it, and a solution needs to be found sooner rather than later.

 

“Any ideas?” Hiroto asks, standing in front of the whiteboard they wheeled out for this exact purpose.

 

“Well, do we know what happened to him? Other than the whole kidnapping thing.” Kirina asks, and it’s a good point - nobody actually knows what Orion did to Asuto after they kidnapped him, but whatever it was they did has traumatized him to hell and back.

 

“Has he told anyone? I think the one most likely to know is Ichihoshi, and we’re _not waking him up.”_ Mansaku says, with a sleeping Ichihoshi sprawled on his lap. Ichihoshi had accidentally fallen asleep and Mansaku hadn’t resisted when the other had slowly started to slump into Mansaku’s lap.

 

“What can we even do if we don’t know?” Kirina asks, occasionally reaching over to gently pet Ichihoshi’s head.

 

“Well, let’s talk long-term ideas first,” Haizaki says, uncapping a whiteboard pen and writing on the whiteboard, “Idea 1: we kill his dad.”

 

“That won’t work, he blames himself for the kidnapping and not his dad because he’s convinced it was his fault for falling into the trap.” Kirina sighs, weary and about ten years younger.

 

 _“Oh Shinjou Takuma you motherfucker,”_ Haizaki seethes as he crosses Idea 1 out on the whiteboard, “alright how about Idea 2: we burn Orion to the ground.”

 

“I love it, but is it achievable?” Hiroto bounces back, and it earns a growl and a restrained _‘fuck!’_ from Haizaki as he angrily crosses that idea out too.

 

“I’ll make it achievable, I just really wanna beat the shit out of Shinjou.” Haizaki hisses.

 

“I mean fair, but Asuto and Ichihoshi already kinda have dibs on that - speaking of, did anyone tell Asuto about the whole, car crash thing?” Kirina asks, making a vague gesture to the sleeping Ichihoshi. 

 

“He doesn’t know?” Hiroto asks incredulously, and he’s met with a lot of floundering from Mansaku, Kirina and Haizaki.

 

“We may have accidentally let slip that Ichihoshi is somehow connected, but that’s apparently all he knows. I don’t think he even knows about the bat thing.” Mansaku explains with a shrug. 

 

“Oh fuck.” is all Hiroto replies with, and he earns sympathetic nods from everyone else.

 

“Is Idea 1 still on the table?” Haizaki asks, barely containing his fury.

 

“Idea 1 is a given.” Mansaku reassures, and the sadistic look Haizaki gives could send a grown man running.

 

“How about this for Idea 3: we get Asuto some therapy?” Goujin voices out, shrugging.

 

“Even less achievable than burning Orion to the ground.” Kirina answers, and it earns a loud ‘FUCK!’ from Haizaki. The volume causes Ichihoshi to stir slightly, and everyone stops breathing in an attempt to make sure Ichihoshi doesn’t wake up. He stays asleep, and everyone shoots Haizaki a death glare.

 

“We need to figure out what Orion did to him if we wanna do anything long-term, so what do we know? He panics whenever he sees a goal scored and he hates having his arms exposed.” Mansaku rattles off, making a pained and confused noise at the end.

 

“What if Orion beat him up for every goal we scored, gosu.” Golem speaks for the first time in this conversation, and everyone just stares at him in response.

 

“Jesus christ Golem, that’s dark.” Hiroto whispers, slightly taken aback by Golem’s sudden morbidity.

 

“They did kill Ichihoshi’s family, gosu.” Golem merely replies with, and it gets a begrudging nod from Hiroto.

 

“He has a point, they did do that,” Haizaki states, thoroughly uncomfortable, “I’ll write it on the board.” Haizaki says before writing ‘Beat the shit out of Asuto for every goal we scored’ under the ‘Theories’ section of the whiteboard.

 

“Why don’t we just try cheering him up for now?” Kirina interjects, and after a second it earns an excited point from Hiroto.

 

“Excellent idea! What could we do? Uno?” Hirito asks, and all of Inakuni balks at his suggestion.

 

“Are you kidding me? I like having my dignity.” Mansaku bites back, face pale in fear, beside him, Kirina speaks a quiet ‘Asuto’s unfairly good at Uno’ to quell Hiroto’s confusion.

 

“Even more of a reason to do it.” 

 

“He once gave me ten +4’s because I skipped his turn  _one time."_

 

_“Alright nevermind.”_

 

"Wait! I know what'll cheer him up!" Goujin suddenly gasps from where he is on the couch, perking up in excitement as he shoots a mischievous look towards Asuto, who’s far away in the conjoined kitchen area to not hear them. Nobody actually knows what Goujin is even _thinking_ half the time, and the same applies here, with Goujin earning confused looks from everyone - especially Mansaku and Kirina - up until he takes his shoes off and starts rubbing his socks against the carpet. 

 

"Oh my god- you're really doing this? The whole 'ooh if I rub my socks against the carpet I can zap people' thing? what are you, _five?"_ Mansaku scolds from his spot on the couch, looking so disappointed in Goujin it's practically sapping life from the room. 

 

"Hey! He _loves_ this! We used to do this all the time! Remember that time when Asuto zapped you and-" Goujin defends, before he's cut off by Mansaku throwing Goujin's own shoe, the traitor.

 

"One time during a sleepover Asuto zapped Mansaku and it scared him so much he fell over into the coffee table. Also, Mansaku bricked his washing machine when he was five." Kirina helpfully supplies to Haizaki, the former spotting  both an opportunity to quell Haizaki's confusion and a way to wind Mansaku up further at the same time. Mansaku simply responds by throwing Goujin's other shoe at Kirina, and Ichihoshi - still dead to the world on Mansaku's lap - responds in turn by slipping onto the floor, landing face first with a thud - _still somehow asleep._

 

"Damn he must really need that sleep." Hiroto whispers with a slight tinge of awe as he gently shakes Ichihoshi, who merely starts softly snoring. 

 

"He got like 4 hours of sleep in a week, I'm surprised he's even still alive." Haizaki replies, gently kicking Ichihoshi in the side in mild disinterest. 

 

"Guys! I'm ready!" Goujin whisper-yells, immediately rerailing the conversation to Goujin's prank. After a quick melodramatic blessing from Kirina and Hiroto, Goujin carefully sneaks over to where Asuto's currently talking to Nosaka about something, back turned to Goujin and body facing slightly away from Nosaka, head tilted down slightly in Goujin thinks is either contemplation or observation of the threads of Nosaka's shirt. 

 

Regardless, the moment Goujin is in range he gently pokes his now-electrified finger into the exposed part of Asuto's neck, and the exact moment his finger connects is - rather unfortunately - the exact moment it all goes to shit. The shock clearly reaches Asuto, as he immediately tenses up, which - okay, Goujin _will_ admit is a pretty normal reaction, childhoods spent zapping eachother be damned. 

 

What _isn't_ a normal reaction, however, is how Asuto stops talking mid-word, not even giving a surprised yelp at the shock, much to Goujin's disappointment. And what's _definitely_ not a normal reaction is just how _still_ Asuto is, never having moved from his pose pre-zap. Goujin's not even sure Asuto's _breathing_ , and he's close enough to practically see the tension in his muscles. It's like he just stopped or he suddenly became a statue or someone hit the pause button on him or _something that isn't right._

 

And it's obvious enough that the group from the couch has noticed, the telltale sound of leather rustling as Mansaku shifts on the couch and Haizaki's quiet 'Asuto?' giving it away. Nosaka must have an even worse view, as his face is scrunched in worry. 

 

"Uh, Asuto?" Goujin asks, quiet and worried for his friend. 

 

Trying to get some sort of reaction from Asuto, Goujin experimentally pokes him in the same spot as before. This time, Asuto snaps back to reality, whirling around to face Goujin as he jolts back with a wet, half-formed scream. Asuto's eyes - blown wide and glassy and budding with tears - look through Goujin rather than at him as they dart frantically about the room, looking for a threat that isn't there. For a split second, Asuto's eyes meet Goujin's, and Goujin's brain slams to a halt when he sees just how much fear is in Asuto's eyes, and how distant and _not here_ he is. 

 

Goujin, dumbfounded with shock, thinks about reaching out to Asuto or talking to him or _something_ , but Asuto beats him to it. Before anyone has time to process what just happened, a short, hitching gasp claws its way out of Asuto, and more follow as he starts to slowly back away into the wall, not present enough to know who or what anyone in the room is. Asuto's steps backwards are jittery and light-footed as if ready to bolt, and he clenches his left arm in a death grip, which twitches as if in contact with electricity. The twitching only makes the tears in Asuto's eyes spill more, and the whimpers morph into harsh cries that scrape the back of Asuto's throat in their clamour to get out, leaving something raw and exposed in its place.

 

In the few seconds it's taken for things to go to shit this badly, Goujin wonders what actually happened, and his stomach turns rotten when he realises it was him. 

 

A few moments later the room snaps out of its collective daze, and everyone previously on the couch practically vault over the thing in their rush to get to Asuto. Haizaki in particular shoving everyone out of the way to get closer, earning a squawk of rage from Mansaku. Ichihoshi, bless him, is still passed out on the floor, and everyone seems to have had enough decency to avoid stepping on him as much as possible in their rush. Nosaka - who'd instinctively moved out of the way when Asuto was backing away - has his arms up in a placating gesture, turned to face Asuto and reciting soothing words to the latter. Meanwhile, Goujin is still standing there, a horrific mixture of guilt, confusion and panic fixing his feet to the ground as he stays rooted.

 

And Asuto, despite not having the cognizance to tell friend from foe, is aware enough of his surroundings to notice the mass of people running towards him, the suddenness of the movement ripping a terrified scream from his throat as he flinched so hard he loses his balance and falls backwards onto his back. The sudden fall winds him for a moment, but he's up into a rough sitting position and scrambling backwards into the corner in desperation too soon to make a difference. If anything, the fear and panic in his eyes seems to have only increased tenfold, and his eyes fog over more as some horrific memory seems to strike him. 

 

Seeing Asuto's reaction to the sudden clamouring from everyone, Nosaka stops what he's doing and immediately puts his arms out as wide as he can, acting as an impromptu physical barrier between Asuto and the others. The others respond in kind by trying to get past Nosaka, Mansaku and Haizaki in particular thrashing as hard as they can to reach Asuto, forcing Nosaka to use his own body to block the two, earning a few smacks to the head. At the very least, Kirina and Golem helps Nosaka by physically dragging Mansaku away from the unofficial boundary line, using all of their strength in the process. Haizaki just doubles his efforts up until he makes eye contact with Asuto, and cold realisation fills his eyes as the fight leaves him, body slumping against Nosaka's as his face pales, obviously seeing something hauntingly familiar that nobody else is. 

 

Nosaka was considerate enough to leave a fair amount of physical distance between the others and Asuto, and the latter seems to take it as an indication he can let himself breathe a little, because his shallow breaths morph into heaving gasps as his eyes dart about too quickly to actually see anything. Asuto takes the presumed safety to bring his knees to his chest and curl into a ball as the cries and gasps become more even. It's not _good_ by any means, but they'll take plain old - if obviously taxing, judging by the full body movements - sobbing as opposed to Asuto hyperventilating. 

 

"What the fuck did you do to him?!" Haizaki roars at Goujin, grabbing his shirt and bringing it to his face. It just makes Asuto sob harder, and a little bit of Haizaki turns to ash in despair.

 

"I didn't do anything!" Goujin defends, because _he really didn't do anything;_ he tried to cheer Asuto up with a harmless prank and now he's sobbing on the floor. 

 

"Well you obviously did _something!_ This doesn't happen for no reason!" Haizaki yells back at point blank range from Goujin's eardrums. The volume of Haizaki's yells accompanied with Asuto's sobbing is loud enough to make Ichihoshi startle awake halfway across the room, and he bolts upright and sprints towards the gathering before he's even fully awake, almost tripping over himself. 

 

"Wh?" is all that Ichihoshi can get out, slurred with the haze of having just woken up. He seems to wake up a bit upon seeing Asuto crying in the corner, because he rushes out a quick "I'll get Coach!" before sprinting out the room, almost tripping over himself yet again.

 

With Ichihoshi out the room and getting someone who knows what the fuck's going on, it's up to Kirina to try and gently calm Asuto down, prattling off about things that ultimately mean nothing but are at least something. All the while, Asuto still cries over something as small as a little zap, and nobody really knows why or what to do. Goujin, gnawed by guilt and other anxieties, just ends up staring at Asuto, trying to figure out what exactly happened just now to cause this. 

 

Belatedly, Goujin realises that whatever happened to Asuto during his captivity definitely had a hand in the state Asuto is in now. ‘Beat up by Orion’ was probably a bit less accurate than ‘Electrocuted by Orion’,

and his shoulders sag as the bad mood worsens. 

 

Ichihoshi returns in roughly half a minute, accompanied by both Sekiya and Coach Zhao, alongside what has to be just under half the team. Sekiya orders the newcomers to wait in the next room over, even asking one of them to fetch Anna and Ootani as Coach walks over directly to the corner where the Asuto is and asks what happened. Once the managers arrive, Sekiya asks them to guard to door from any curious teammates and makes a beeline to the little gathering of despair. 

 

Upon hearing a brief rundown from Nosaka about what happened, Sekiya takes Goujin out into the hallway for 'a little talk' as Coach joins the effort to get Asuto to calm down. When they return, Goujin looks ashen with horror and neither him nor Sekiya explain why, and Goujin won’t meet anyone’s curious glances.

 

Regardless of whatever horrific knowledge Goujin is now in possession of, Asuto does eventually manage to calm down enough to breathe normally, and his sobs trail off into small hiccups as tries to curl up into a tighter ball, refusing to look at anyone. It takes a while, but Coach Zhao manages to get Asuto to come with him to his office for some space and probably a very serious talk, and Mansaku helps Asuto stand up as the latter gets guided by Coach out the room. 

 

Asuto doesn't look at anyone as he leaves, too ashamed of himself. 

 

\---

 

It takes a good solid hour for Asuto to return from his talk with Coach.

 

It was mostly just Asuto recovering from his mental breakdown and talking about it with Coach, up to and including Coach giving Asuto a very heartfelt speech when Asuto mentioned that he felt it was his fault, and now Goujin is beating himself up for nothing. Even still, guilt curdles in Asuto’s gut for the upteenth time, and at this point he’s wondering whether Orion should’ve even bothered letting Asuto leave if he’s just going to hurt his friends more and more every time he’s around them.

 

It’s been a while since the whole Goujin incident happened, and Goujin still won’t meet his eyes. Everyone’s confused, and Asuto still doesn’t have the strength to tell his friends what they need to know, yet another in a long list of failures on his part.

 

Goujin obviously knows, because the colour still hasn’t returned to his face, and Asuto vaguely wants to scream. It’s not fair, it’s not fair that Goujin has to know the result of Asuto’s failings because he made one innocent mistake, and it’s not fair that this happened in the first place. But fairness was never a thing that Asuto ever knew, be it with his mom’s untimely demise or his entire dad’s existence. Really, life has been a downhill spiral for Asuto the moment he was born, huh?

 

His mood is ruined, happiness and faith in himself to not be a fuckup now six feet under. Still, when Mansaku mentions while they’re all sat on the couch that he’s suddenly gotten approximately seventeen missed calls from Michinari he can’t help but be interested. Then Kirina does some rudimentary googling and finds a news article about Asuto’s reappearance translated into Japanese, which means that the news has finally reached back home and all of Inakuni still there.

 

“Welp, secret’s out I guess. Wonder why they haven’t called Asuto.” Kirina half-ponders as he too is inundated with calls from Michinari. It’s pretty late here in Kazan, already approaching the beginning of the evening, meaning that it must be even later back home. Still, it’s touching that his friends care that much about him.

 

“I don’t have a phone anymore.” Asuto shrugs, eating some noodles Ootani had graciously given him earlier than dinner was due for. A touching gesture, Asuto should probably repay her.

 

“Oh, right, yeah.” Kirina deflates a little, and oh for _fucks sake_ Asuto, do you really need to ruin the good mood _every time?_ Not this time, Satan.

 

“I mean, one of you could give me your phone and I could message the group chat?” Asuto suggests, and a lightbulb collectively goes off between all of Inakuni. 

 

Ah yes, the Inakuni group chat, the bastion of memes and the ‘Coach Time’ phenomena, where everyone will randomly just change their profile pic to the same memetic picture of Coach and change their name to some variant of ‘Coach Zhao Jinyun’ specifically to cause havoc. It’s a hilarious inside joke, but nobody on InaJapan seems to appreciate it, what a shame.

 

“Mansaku, give me your phone, I have an idea.” Asuto demands, unable to quite keep the shit-eating grin off his face. Mansaku is all too happy to oblige, practically throwing his phone at Asuto.

 

A selfie and approximately a minute later, a message gets sent to the _#general_ channel:

 

 ***incoherent fish noises***                                                                                                                                                           **Today**

 **@everyone** **Inamori Asuto, who was kidnapped in Russia a week ago and presumed missing, just sent me this:**

 

**_I_lived_bitch.jpg_ **

 

It takes approximately seven seconds for the group to see the message, the dreaded ‘ _Several people are typing…’_ message appearing alongside a barrage of the group chat collectively screaming. Asuto hands Mansaku his phone back as it endlessly pings notifications, laughing like a madman.

 

 **Team Mominari**                                                                                                                                                                         **Today**

**_VKJSGKJBNETJKBHNRTKL_ **

**_RALKSGNGESKJFNBLSD_ **

**_SALKVNKLEKLNH_ **

**_WH_ **

**_ASUTO!!!_ **

**_A S U T O!!!_ **

 

A group call gets started, and Mansaku glances at Asuto before deliberately declining the call, and repeatedly declines the next fifteen group calls that follow it, wheezing so hard he’s at serious risk of collapsing his lung.

 

 **Team Mominari**                                                                                                                                                                       **Today**

**_IS HE ALRIGHT?? IS HE WITH YOU??? WHAT HAPPENED??_ **

**@fishnoises4180** **_ANSWER THE CALL_**

 **@fishnoises4180** **_MANSAKU ANSWER THE FUCKING CALL_**

 

 **Goal: kept**                                                                                                                                                                                 **Today**

**_YAMERO_CAT.JPG_ **

 

 **Gouenji Shuuya Is My Dad Actually** **Today**

**_DUDE WHAT THE FUCK_ **

 

 **Can’t Hurt Me These Shades Are Gucci**                                                                                                                                   **Today**

**_:CLOWN: :CLOWN: :CLOWN:_ **

 

Asuto and the rest can vaguely make out the sound of Goujin screaming from down the hallway, followed shortly by Haizaki’s insane cackling. Thunderous footsteps are then heard, and then the missing portion of the InaJapan InaKuni’s barge into the room.

 

“A group call?!” Goujin screams and Asuto can’t stop laughing.

 

“Sure why not! I wanna talk to them!” Asuto enthusiastically supplies, before a moment of realisation strikes him.

“Mansaku before you answer that call, let me troll them some more.” Asuto says, before making his way so that he’s out of the way of Mansaku’s and everyone else’s phones so that he’ll be out of the shot when Mansaku answers the call. It earns a cackle from Haizaki and a ‘FUCKING GENIUS!’ from Mansaku, high on severely fucking with their teammates.

 

Mansaku clicks the accept call button on the upteenth call, and the screen switches to all the Inakuni’s back home. Or, well, _almost_ all of them - Kozoumaru and Norika are nowhere in sight, meaning it’s just Hiyori, Michinari, Hattori and Okuiro. They look ansty and bewildered, eyes wide and clearly looking for Asuto within the shot. It takes approximately two seconds for them to spot he isn’t there, and all hell breaks loose.

 

 _“Where the fuck is he you CLOWNS?!”_ Okuiro roars, earning hysterical laughter from Mansaku and Asuto, who has to slap a hand over his mouth to stop himself from giggling.

 

“Mansaku don’t make me kill you, I WILL do it.” Michinari warns, hair a frazzled mess.

 

“Where’s Asuto? I thought he was fine! The news said he was fine! Is he actually fine? DID HE GET KIDNAPPED AGAIN?!” Hiyori demands with increasing volume and terror, and the other three look at the Russia-bound part of their team with expectant glares.

 

“He’s fine! We just wanted to talk to you guys!” Kirina reassures, and it only gets him much fiercer glares.

 

“Without our son present? Without the precious Sonshine?” Okuiro retorts, incredulous.

 

“Well where’s Kozoumaru and Norika?” Goujin bounces back, and it riles Okuiro up even more.

 

“Asuto’s been missing for an entire week, I asked first!” He yells, and it gets Haizaki riled up in response.

 

“He’s fine, he’s been back since this morning?” Haizaki reassures, and it only earns him more angrily protective yelling in response.

 

“Why didn’t you tell us then?! We had to wait for the news to be translated and everything! What kept you so busy?!” Michinari demands, and the shit-eating part of Asuto’s brain knows this is it, this is how he gets obliterated by Michinari.

 

 _“Me!”_ Asuto happily chirps as he pokes his head to be just barely in frame, and Michinari’s angry words morph into screaming. Hattori actually starts crying tears of relief.

 

“Oh my god!” Michinari chokes out, overwhelmed with emotion, along with everyone else in the call.

 

“Hey, guys, I really missed seeing you.” Asuto sniffs, suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to cry at seeing his closest friends after an entire week of hell.

 

Everyone is too overwhelmed to actually form coherent words, so they instead spend the next twenty minutes just crying tears of joy and relief at finally seeing Asuto safe - or in Asuto’s case, finally _being_ safe - for the first time in a whole week. By the time the last tear has been shed, everyone’s a snot-ridden mess, but at least they’re a hell of a lot happier.

 

“So, uh, where _are_ Kozoumaru and Norika?” Kirina asks, and Michinari opens his mouth before closing it, repeating the process a few more times.

 

“Well, uh-” Michinari starts, before he’s interrupted.

 

“Kozoumaru got lost in the mountains.” Okuiro reveals with all the tact of a nuclear strike, and flinches when there’s a chorus of ‘WHAT?!’ from the other end of the line.

 

“He’s fine now!” Michinari reassures, before Okuiro steps in again.

 

“He almost got mauled by a bear!” 

 

“‘ALMOST MAULED’ DOES NOT MEAN ‘ACTUALLY MAULED’!”

 

“What happened?” Asuto interjects, and the sound of Asuto’s voice immediately quells the noise, and Michinari goes to explain.

 

“Two hours after we called you guys last week, Kozoumaru went out to the mountains to do that training regimen he’s been doing recently and, uh, got lost in the mountains for the week. He was perfectly fine, but it still stressed us out.” He says, and the Inakuni’s all the way in Russia can only blink in dumb shock.

 

“Huh.” Asuto says.

 

“Yeah, we’re all kinda pissed at him a lil for it.” Hiyori nods.

 

“Also, Coach wouldn’t have told you this in advance because it’s _Coach_ but Kozoumaru and Norika on a plane to Russia right now.” Michinari answers, bracing himself for the other’s reaction. Kozoumaru and Norika, on a plane to Russia, presumably to join InaJapan.

 

“Why?” Mansaku blurts out at the same time Haizaki groans a ‘A fourth Goalie? We only use one!’

 

“Yeah I don’t know why they did it but surprise! They should be arriving tomorrow morning your time. But! They have undergone a surprising transformation and they wanna see how you react to it!” Hiyori happily supplies.

 

“For the love of god PLEASE send your reactions in the group chat, I tried to take Kozoumaru’s intestines out of his body when I first saw him. We can’t spoil it you just have to experience it.” Okuiro begs, a frantic kind of energy burning in his eyes.

 

“...but then he’ll see it?” Asuto tenderly replies, and Okuiro goes through the five stages of grief right then and there.

 

“Fuck.” is all he says.

 

“Anyway,” Michinaru interjects, redirecting the conversation onto something more important. “How is everyone? Give me the details.” he asks.

 

They make idle chitchat for the next few hours and fill eachother in on what’s happened recently, and it’s good that Asuto’s in the front of the pack, because otherwise he’d have seen everyone’s throat slicing gestures whenever someone ventures a bit too close to touching upon the elephant in the room. This is meant to be a fun, lighthearted conversation before bed, _not_ another thing that makes Asuto start crying. Heaven knows he’s had enough of that.

 

By the time the call ends, it’s well approaching the group bedtime, and everyone begins to make their way off to their dorms. Asuto and Goujin share a room, so they make their way to their shared dorm. They get ready for bed, brushing their teeth and changing into their pajamas before finally settling into bed, ready to finally embrace the blissful emptiness of sleep.

 

Except, that’s not what happens. Asuto’s tired, all of Orion’s electrostatic tortures taking his body to its absolute limit and further, and he feels an exhaustion deep in his bones, but he just _can’t sleep._ Because the darkness of the room and the placement of his bed and the drab plaster of the ceiling is hauntingly familiar, and Asuto’s already tortured mind hardly needs any more prompting for it to overlay his bed in his shared dorm with the bed in that cold, dark cell. It doesn’t take long for his mind to flash back to all those times he spent just, staring at the ceiling, tracing all the minuscule details with his eyes until he could recreate them in his sleep. He did that so many times because there was nothing else he could do; he was isolated, in a dark cell underground where nobody will ever find him, and the only things that happened to him were unpredictable bouts of torture. He had tried making noises just to fill the silence, but it only brought a crushing sense of despair whenever the only noise that echoed was the sound of his own poor, scared voice. He tried so desperately to waste away his time by staring at the ceiling because that was all he could do, nothing else to occupy him from the despair and madness that was slowly starting to creep its way into Asuto’s mind.

 

He was so alone back there, locked up in an underground cell with no-one coming to rescue him from the father that put him there. Here, in his bed back at the sports centre, he’s alone too, staring at the ceiling to pass the time and Goujin too far out of his reach.

 

Tears start springing to his eyes, his face burning as he tries to suppress them, push his incoming breakdown far down into his mind until it can’t ever rear its ugly head again. But he can’t, and the sniffles are the first crack in the dam before the whole thing breaks, and he’s got a hand clamped over his mouth to keep his weeping as quiet as possible so as to not disturb Goujin.

 

Unfortunately, Goujin is woken up despite Asuto’s wishes, or maybe he was never properly asleep at all. Regardless, there’s the sound of rustling and someone getting out of bed, footsteps quietly padding on the carpet.

 

“Asuto? You okay there buddy?” Goujin asks, quiet and reassuring, and Asuto can’t stop the hiccup that forces its way out of him in response.

 

“Hey man, what’s up?” Goujin asks, careful to keep his voice as casual as possible, “is this about the zapping thing from earlier? Because Sekiya explained all of that and I’m so sorry-”

 

“No, it’s not that,” Asuto finally chokes out, “It’s just, I dunno, the way this room feels right now is making me feel like I’m back there again. I keep thinking I’m alone again.” Asuto explains, and Goujin gets a rare look of deep thought across his face before an idea strikes him.

 

“Well then why don’t we just share the same bed! That way you won’t feel alone, right?” Goujin suggests, and Asuto’s silent for a moment to think about it, but Goujin takes it the wrong way and starts backtracking.

 

“Uh actually now that I’ve said it out loud it sounds kinda weird-”

 

“Let’s try it.” 

 

At that, Goujin’s sheepish look turns into one of surprise, and Asuto takes it as a cue to reassure him further.

 

“I mean, it’s worth a shot, right?” Asuto reassures with a wet laugh that only sounds kind of alive, but Goujin still gives a determined nod.

 

Asuto throws off his blanket and makes his way to Goujin’s bed, and is promptly enveloped into a protective bearhug by Goujin, the taller boy using his height to designate himself as the bigger spoon, with Asuto as the small spoon and face pressed against Goujin’s chest. Asuto doesn’t mind it - loves it in fact, the constant contact from Goujin reassuring his hysterical mind.

 

“Oh man, Nishikage would’ve been perfect for this, him and his big comforting tiddies.” Goujin randomly blurts out once they’re both settled, and Asuto’s lungs and throat almost collapse with the force of his sudden laughing fit, burying his face further into Goujin’s chest as his body is wracked with laughter and not sobs. Goujin can’t stop laughing too, and together they’re a giggling mess.

 

By the time all’s said and done and they’re finished laughing, they’re too tired to even wish eachother a goodnight, and they both fall into a blissful sleep. 

 

It’s the first time Asuto’s not had a nightmare since this whole disaster began, and even with how this day has gone less than stellar, it’s probably the best sleep he ever remembers getting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No I don't know why Hiroto is an honorary member of the Asuto Protection Squad, but he's feral and hates his dad too so he's probably about to become Asuto's best friend alongside a completely apeshit Hikaru. Rest In Fucking Pieces, Shinjou Takuma.
> 
> Also!! This is all I have for chapters right now!! I've been meaning to get this one out much earlier but it kept getting bigger and bigger but I'm glad I got it out before the end of the decade!! Unfortunately, I have exams next month and also next year so I'm gonna be back up and running at late Jan/Feb at the very earliest
> 
> Thank u sm for putting up with my shit updating skills sfkjsngk i'm so sorry for all of this

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact I actually started writing this just after ep 25 aired because I had an Angstamori dream about the potential TakuDad theory and. Given the recent revelations I have gathered from ep 27 (there's no good English subs out rip) I am inclined to believe that Asuto is going to get Orion'd in the very near future.
> 
> Also rip the entire first chapter because ep 27 just lowkey destroyed it but I'm too lazy to change it especially since I don't have subs yet. I was a massive supporter of Asuto being the second traitor but unwillingly but now that ep27 has revealed it was Shirou I'm just gonna go ahead and cry.


End file.
